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I love exploring blogs and what fascinates me is not necessarily the posts but the comments. For me it's sometimes like taking a peek into the lives of ordinary/everyday people like me. The anonymity that the Internet avails us allows one to tell even their deepest darkest secrets. People tell about things they do or have done, things they have experienced or are experiencing, the things that they are least proud of, and so on. In fact reading comments used to be one of my guilty pleasures. Some comments leave me rolling on the floor in laughter, some nearly bring me to tears and some comments just leave my mouth hanging wide open. So I thought it might be a good idea to occasionally bring a few comments that I find interesting and share them with you so we could discuss or analyze them. 
This particular comment was culled from BELLA NAIJA. The post was related to domestic violence and a question was asked; What would you do if three weeks after your wedding your husband basically "dashes you slap". 

Now this comment is one of those that left my mouth hanging open. In my opinion it was all shades of messed up . Let me begin by saying that I have never been and by God's grace, will never be a victim of domestic violence. This post is not about domestic violence itself (topic for another day), but the comment.
     I agree with the first thing she said, when you truly love someone it may be difficult to just up and leave. But everything that followed....made my head spin. So her dad pummeled her mum "ALL THE TIME" and the woman refused to run for her dear life and the daughter is grateful her mother stayed and endured the beatings! Na wa o! I just had to ask, if one day while her father doled out punches and one was fatal, would she be singing this tune? 
And my people, did you know that there's a standard for acceptable and unacceptable beating? If he slaps you everyday and isn't remorseful then it's ok to consider leaving. But guess what, if he beats you, say, every four months then it's ok, there's nothing wrong with that. 
Also, The victim must have done something to deserve the beating!? Really? Really?? Really??? OMG! I honestly cannot believe its a woman saying this. Suffice it to say that if you marry into this girl's family and her brother turns you into a punching bag, don't bother calling for a family meeting because you're on a loooooong thing. 
And no, I do not believe you were brought together with someone to change them. You are not the Holy Spirit! 
I actually sympathize with the poster for having to witness all that she must have. I strongly recommend she get some therapy and counseling because she has unfortunately come to accept domestic violence as the norm. NOBODY deserves to be beaten by the one person who's supposed to love them the most, even under provocation. Ask yourself, if your husband's boss (male or female) insults, taunts, humiliates and generally provokes him, will he raise his fist in a fight? Chances are, he would not even raise his voice. So it shouldn't be when it comes to you that he begins to flex his muscles. Mba nu!
Please does anyone else see anything wrong with this comment or is it just me? 


  1. The thing about DV as with so many other things is that its all one big cycle. Women who have grown up in such homesgo ahead marry men who willbeat them up as well. Like you said, she really needs counselling

  2. Yes she does!! If my future husband so much as fantasizes about laying a finger on me, amma go all Lorena Bobbit on his errr, his ass!

  3. The husband should love his wife as Christ loves the church. Erm... Christ actually DIED for the church. I don't see any husband dying if he's beating her.


  4. hahahahahahahhah...... I know English is not our mother tongue but mehhnnnn it was hard reading that stuff. The fact she classified domestic abuse into ".... he is beating everyday and he isn't remorseful" and "... he beats you or slaps you every 4 months" ????. I think it will be easier for me to forgive an unfaithful husband .

  5. Well the only reason a woman should leave her husband in the bible in sexual infidelity, not DV. That being said if anyone dare touch any of my sisters I'll not advice my sister to leave the marriage but I might make her a widow.


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