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The Proposal

He kept calling me.
Maxwell kept calling me.

I don’t know why because after the fifteenth call, he should have given up. I stood him up last night. We were supposed to go to Cheesecake Factory for dinner but I didn’t show up. I was in one of those moods where I would fling a china dish on someone. It wasn’t PMS. My voice mail box is full. I deliberately left my mail box full because all these telemarketers would not let me see the life of day so they might as well call and not have to deal with my voicemail. Maxwell and I had been seeing each other for about nine months and he is the only man that I have dated that I treat like crap. My laundry list of men left me with too many wet hankies and he is my revenge. Unfortunately I think the fact that I am mean to him is a turn on and God knows how many beautiful material possessions I have acquired in nine months, one of which includes a $500 pair of Gucci sunglasses. No matter what I do to Maxwell he keeps coming over and calling me. Two weeks ago my cousin told me to stop being mean and just love him back and then I thought about it for the first time. Love didn’t cross my mind and I am definitely not in love with him.

I strolled into work by 9.30am. I was fashionably late. I had to take my neighbor to the airport and there was traffic on I 101 on my way back. My co workers stared at me like I was crazy. Their fake smiles never ceased to amaze me and I still haven’t gotten over the bathroom incident. The LED light on my office phone was flashing. I had a new message. I pressed the “play button”

“Hey, I have been trying to reach you, called your cell phone so many times, your voicemail is full, I had to call you at work and you are still not picking up. Can I see you today at 1pm? Please show up, it is very important. I will be at Red Lobster, our usual spot. See you.”

Why is he still wasting his time? If I didn’t show up last night, why should I show up this afternoon? Anyway, I guess I would go and just have free lunch on him. I picked up the phone and called him back. It went straight to voicemail. Oh well. I left him a message letting him know I would show up.

At 12.35pm , I left the office and drove to Red Lobster. I wasn’t excited to go over there or nothing; I just wanted a free meal and have the opportunity to look at the handsome man that I am not in love with. I pulled up to the parking lot at 12.58pm, right on time and spotted his Camaro in the parking lot. He was there, always on time. I checked my make up, my mascara wasn’t running and my lipstick was on point. I did the pout and stepped out of the car. No one needs to tell me I look dashing and hot in my Anne Klein suit, my 12 inch Remi was blowing in the wind. Haha!!!

He was already seated with the Menu in his hand when I joined him. He was sipping from his glass of water.

“Hey” I began.

“Hey, you look great.” He said smiling.

“Thank you.” I responded.

“So what’s good?”

“You didn’t show up last night” he said

“Oh that, I am sorry, I had a headache and fell asleep” I responded and looked at him. The look on his face told me that he didn’t believe me, he said nothing. We pored over our menu’s and then ordered some food. Thirty minutes later our waiter brought our food. I loved my tall glass of coke with ice that was my usual. I started sipping from it while I ate. Maxwell was quiet but he kept watching me. I felt like he poisoned me or something, he just kept staring at me as if he was looking for a reaction.

“What’s wrong?” I asked breaking the silence.

“Nothing” he replied. “Are you enjoying your meal?”

“Yes” I said.

I kept sipping from my drink and then I noticed something sparkle from the ice. I took a closer, in the middle of the ice in my half way drunk coke was a ring. Oh my goodness. I looked at Maxwell and he smiled.

“A ring” I blurted out because I was out of breath. It was the most beautiful ring. Princess cut. My dream engagement ring. The diamonds sparkled. I took the ring out of the glass and Maxwell took it from me and went down on one knee.

“Baby, I may not be your dream man but I am in love with you, I see you taking care of my home and being the mother to my children and also my friend. You are a great woman and I want to take care of you forever, will you be my wife?.” He said. Replay. I looked around there was a curious lady staring at me with her boyfriend.Oh my goodness, I am not even in love with this fool but like my grand mother would say love grows if you let it. You cultivate it and let it grow. He will provide me security not like I cant afford to take care of myself and he is in love with me, the best thing that has happened since I started dating men. He loves me and proves it all the time even when I treat him like a damn retard.

“Yes” I found myself saying. The lady and her boyfriend clapped.

He got up and gave me a hug. I expected a kiss, like in the movies, it was romantic and beautiful this one was just, ughh. Anyway he slipped the ring in my finger and it fit perfectly. Now I know why whenever he held my hand he was always playing with that finger.

Hyperventilating was an understatement. I was out of control. He sat down.

“I am so excited, I need to tell my family.” I said as I took out my I Phone.

“Not so fast, lets fix a date.” He said.

“Maybe next year.” I said.

“ 90 days from now” he said, I can afford the wedding.

“Waoh” I said breathless. “It is like a dream”

“ Best believe it is happening, so honey we could get married this summer 90 days from now” he replied.

“Oh okay.” I replied.

“So honey lets count 90days from now, what is todays date?” he asked me. I looked on my cell phone. He had a smirk on his face and smiled wickedly. Oh no, this wasn’t happening.

“April 1st” I replied slowly. I had just been fooled.

This story was written by my good friend Oyinlola Oseni. You can check out the other great stuff she has on her blog ;


  1. Hahaha.... ooops! You see if you dont like him, dont force it. She could have saved her face. Bobo maxwell sha...*smh* Good work oyin.

  2. Lol. how could he do that to her o! Not fair jor!


  4. OMG! that guy is mean mehn! lovely story

  5. Hahahaha, chai! Serves her right, she should have known it was too good to be true cos she hadn't done anything to deserve him.

  6. Bwahahahahahaha...laffn in spanglish.... Oh dear feel real sorry for her



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