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Wanderings of a Plus Size Diva (A pinch of Self-Delusion)

Hell yes!!!
This picture makes me laugh every time I see it. If you're plus size I'm sure you can relate. A lot of people who are passed the size 14 cringe at the thought of wearing a sleeveless dress or top. In fact it takes a lot of "bravery" and self-confidence, and some times a healthy amount of self-delusion. Self-delusion is necessary sometimes, trust me! Its something I occasionally experience along with a mild dose of reverse-anorexia. Lol. I'll explain it, there are times I look in the mirror and I honestly can't see how big I am. I am a size 18 but my reflection shows me size 14. On such days I rock the hottest baddest outfits I own, and if I go out and someone says "Wow! You're big!", my reaction would be "you must be seeing double". Lol. Note that, on such days I am a lot happier and livelier than I am on my "Oh No. I'm so huge!" days. 
         Back to the matter. Last weekend I went for a show at The Oriental with a friend, it was one of those red carpet events with a lot of celebs where everyone tried to outdo theirselves lest they end up on the pages of Bella Naija and have those extremely fashion conscious readers shred them to pieces.
My friend who used to be a size 18/20 and is now is size 10 was wearing a longsleeve dress, and I, in all my size 18 glory was in a short, sleeveless dress. We then, for reasons I fail to understand, began to argue about sleeveless versus long-sleeves. She said even though she's lost all that weight she's still so self-conscious and can never be caught dead in a sleeveless outfit. This my friend in question is hotter than fire o! Yet she looked at me in my sleeveless mini dress like I'm the eighth world wonder.
        Truth is, I look at myself, I do not know how the world sees me, nor do I care really. I wear what I feel I look good in, I wear what makes me happy, and not what others would find acceptable. In your head you may be thinking "wow, see her arms like two tubers of yams" but as long as I look in the mirror and I feel like screaming "beyonce move over, there's a new diva in town" then that's good enough for me. I guess this all boils down to happiness. I strongly believe in doing whatever makes you happy as long as no one gets hurt. Likewise, dress in ways that make you happy without worrying about what others think or how you're perceived. I love short dresses, in fact, all my "outing" dresses are short and I rock them with pride. 
        That said, I will not fail to point out that its important to know what works for you, and also to put your body type into consideration when choosing outfits. Because the better you look, the better you feel. 

        I must also point out that your best accessory is CONFIDENCE. If you lack it, I could lend you a pinch of my self-delusion. 
       Don't get me wrong; would I like to be a curvaceous size 12? OF COURSE.
       But till that day comes, in this life or the next one, I will love the body I'm in, I will dress it in those outfits that make me walk with an extra spring in my steps and huge grin on my face.
 I may work towards my desired weight, but every step of the way I will celebrate my body and rock those sleeveless dresses I love. 
Because Life is simply too short to dress for someone else!


  1. Dat last paragraph did it for me,well said...and YES,I love yuuu thelma

    1. Mariam, you have no idea how much I LOVE YOU. Thanks!!!

  2. i want that time i come to Lagos its mine...

    1. It's yours. I promise. I hereby bequeath my dress to Anonymous.

  3. I have always had big arms even as a size 12. After my first pregnancy I increased to a 16 and managed to drop to a 14. I don't have d confidende to rock sleeveless but a iadmire big girls who do. Any ways right now I'm preggers again and I have sky rocketed to an 18 and I wear lots of sleeveless dresses and even tube dresses. Cuz of heat! Phew and IDK wat any one says till I put to bed sha lol.
    Btw u look nothing like a size 18 Oo°˚˚˚°! U look like a 14.

    1. Tokoni I think it's because I'm tall that I don't look that big in the picture. Congrats on the new baby, in advance.

  4. Sleeveless and Fearless! It really takes a lot of guts to rock the sleeveless dress if you're on the big side. But some people just don't care.

  5. Babe did u raid my mind?! U know dis is one of 'our' biggest worries! Anyways I hve re-discovered my naturally overflowing self confidence ( and occasional self delusion! Bt den potatoe, tomato...all na 4 salad) n so I've been rocking d bad 3 : prints, sleeveless n tinyweenie clothes, both shorts n dresses (n u know dat last part is bound 2 create drama of epic proportions *wink) Realised after watching my size 22 inlaw lay down d sexy in I really little LBD dat life too short 2 spend it looking lik a frump! So imma live la vida! (Smtyms wit da dats anoda tori *wink) Ziggy.

    1. Ziggy! Should have known that was you!

  6. Confidence is key.If it feels right,rock it!

  7. U got it! Life is too short to dress for someone other than yourself! My next pm, permission? Don't worry il give you credit


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