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A Relationship after The Relationship.

So apparently Iyanya is to appear in Yvonne Nelson's new movie and the minute I saw this I started thinking. Can I work with my ex on the same project, in the same office, in the same environment? I've never had to do this and honestly I'm not sure if I can. 
      If I did the breaking up and we subsequently start working together, anytime I see him with another girl I'll get mad that he's moving on.
      If he did the breaking up, well I'll just generally be mad! And I don't think I could bear to see him with someone else, living life like nothing happened when he almost destroyed mine (I exaggerate a little). 
      I mean naturally after a break up its expected that he'll move on but do I really need to be a living witness to his moving on, on a daily basis? Mind you, even though I've moved on, even though I'm in a new relationship, I still don't think I'll care to see that. 

This reminds me of Lamide Akintobi and Ebuka Obi-Uchendu of Ebony Life's The Spot, I hear they are Exs and that they were once engaged! Every time I watch that show I keep scrutinizing them, looking out for telltale signs. There are none but as far as I'm concerned that's all for the camera jor! Can two people who were once so in love, to the point of making that decision to be together for the rest of their lives be friends when it ends? Can they just live life like nothing happened?
        When a relationship ends it's my understanding that unless it was a loveless one then one party (at least) always ends up being hurt and unhappy. If you both decide "erm, ok, let's end it" and go on with life like business as usual then as far as I'm concerned there was no love. Probably just mindless shagging or friendship devoid of passion and chemistry.
       Those are not what I'm referring to as relationships. I'm referring to that one where there was friendship, love, chemistry, passion, steamy hot sex (maybe), memories, long meaningful and meaningless conversations, tiffs, misunderstandings, make-up sex, French kisses first thing in the morning even with dragon breathe, and plans for a future... That is the kind of relationships I'm referring to. And when this ends can both parties become friendly, civil while working together?
         I can't remember who it was that once said "Unless you can die when the dream is passed, oh never call it lovin' " Of course not literally but you get the drift. 

It's just like Katrina Campins and Ben Moss of the reality show, Miami Hot Listings. They're business partners, own and run a company together and guess what, they were once married! I keep on wondering about it, I mean Ben has moved on and is seeing someone seriously (last I checked) and Katrina is still single and searching. And they have to work closely together everyday, Katrina even has to meet with and be civil to her ex-husband's chic. Honestly I think I would lose it if I had to endure this everyday! 
      These people all look cool and well put together on TV but what happens behind the cameras? And then let's raise the issue of Okafor's Law, we all know how it is, the relationship is over but the sex isn't.... (Topic for another day). Do you think during break they rush to the storage room for a "quick one"? And most importantly, how do the new people people in their lives feel about them working with the former other-halfs? How would you feel?

Let me point out that I'm not referring strictly to being friends with your ex. Most of us are, but we don't have to see them everyday and know all the details of their lives, whether we want to or not, like we would have to if we work together. 


  1. As for Lamide and Ebuka I really wonder how they do it. I don't think I can o!

  2. Like seriously I cnt stand it,call a spade a spade.

  3. Whenever I see my ex we instantly start undressing each other with our eyes so I don't think I'll be comfy with my current gf being in close proximity with her ex on a daily basis. AS you said Thelma, except they were never really in that "kind" of relationship

  4. Sorry o before I comment on this topic lemme sha first ask a question that has been on my mind.....this iyanyas body is it just me or does he have low waist?.....
    ehen now to the topic at hand the only way I can be in close proximity with an ex is if my life (emotionally, physically, financially etc.) Is going way better than expected and better than his is...I have to do him pepper eye na...

  5. Lamide and Ebuka were never engaged they broke up 8 years ago. Stop with the stupid talk.


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