There's a Yoruba adage that says The cane that was used to beat the first wife is on the roof top for the second wife. My understanding of this adage is, succinctly put, Karma is a bit*h.
I'm not going to talk about people's personal lives as I'm not a part of it so I won't get involved, nor do I have any desire to. However, I am curious about certain things and I would like us to discuss them, I need answers.
Is the cane used for the first wife always used on the second? Is it possible to have a more fulfilling and happier marriage as a second wife than the first one did?
Just a short while back, Adaora Ufondu's marriage to multi-millionaire, Emeka Offor, as his 3rd wife, made headlines and I kept on seeing this adage in the comments section. But sentiments apart, is it possible that 3rd time's the charm and she could be his "true love"? I know that sounds corny but just think about it....
I heard a story of a man who had been married to his wife for about seven years. They had three children. The man began to have an affair with his secretary and his wife divorced him. The man got married to the secretary and they've been happily married for twenty three years.
So, stories like this make me think.
My second question, and the reason for the picture above is what could such a woman be thinking?Let me put it in context. In 2012 the Yoruba actress, Bisi Ibidapo-Obe claimed she was pregnant for Dino Melaye and he denied it, they both created a messy situation and the media turned it into a circus. Now barely some months back his wife asks for a divorce citing spousal abuse, and even put out pictures to support her claims, she also asks for custody of her three children (whom "gist" says she's being denied by her husband). Now while this is still ongoing and the divorce isn't even final Dino is engaged to the buriful lady above, we hear the introduction is this week.
I'm sure we've all heard similar stories. But what intrigues me is the mindset of this woman and others like her. Do they think
a) it would be different with them
b) the man loves them more than the others and therefore would treat them better
c) even if he treats them just as bad, "there are worse things in life"
d) they just don't care
e) the benefits far outweigh the negatives
f) the struggle to be Mrs is real
g) love conquers all
I've run out of ideas. What do you guys think? Have you or someone you know been in this situation, how does it usually play out. And do you agree that Karma doesn't always show up?