I've loved in the past, and I'm fortunate to say I've been loved too. I've had some fantastic relationships and I've had those that I would only wish on an enemy. I've met men, the good, the kind, the nonchalant, the mean, the hurtful, and yet more. It's not often you get to meet that person that was perfectly tailored to suit you, or that was made just for you.
I remember the night I met *Obi, just like it was last weekend. No it wasn't, it was years ago. It was at Swé Bar, Obi was with his friends, about six of them and they were the life of the party, but it was him who had my attention, and my heart. Watching them it was quite obvious that they were hardworking men who had obviously had a hectic week at work and really needed to unwind. The way they danced like they just didn't care, like nobody was watching, like everybody was watching..... There was something so refreshing about watching them. But Obi, something about him, how he was the most attractive of the lot in spite of the fact that he wore Senegalese to club long before it became cool for men to wear traditional attire to clubs, something about his bushy head of hair, and how he danced and laughed with reckless abandon, so many things about him made me want him, so naturally I was pleased when it so happened that he'd been wanting me all along too.
Later that weekend, on Sunday, Obi came over to mine and spent a couple of hours. It was like I had found my missing rib (LOL). In the months to follow I would have what till date has probably
been my most amazing relationship.
been my most amazing relationship.
Our first date was on Good Friday. That night we were meant to go and have drinks but he suggested we go for evening mass instead. That would be the most memorable mass I've ever attended in my life. All through mass we held hands, and looked in each other's eyes and smiled at each other and sat so closely together and though if we let an inch between us something bad would happen. Mass ended and it was then he told me the real reason he wanted us to come for mass; he knew his mum would be in church and he wanted her to meet me. I remember how she hugged me tight and called me "nwa m" my child. She was so pleased that we were from neighbouring villages and that I was studying law. In the less than five minutes we spent together, she hugged me three times. After we left his mum, the next stop was the Reverend father's house. Obi had told one of his father-friends about me and he wanted him to meet me too. We spent the next hour having tea and biscuits with Father in their beautiful quaters. And later that night when Obi dropped me off, we kissed for the first time. My most memorable kiss till date.
Obi and I proceeded to have a fantastic relationship. He met with my siblings and my mum and my brothers seemed to really like him (which doesn't happen very often). I met his friends and colleagues and bosses and everyone who mattered to him. I remember the first time we made love..... No doubt Obi was my most memorable lover till date.
Obi, I remember that day you came to meet up with me at the Galleria. I watched you from the top most floor while you chatted to your friends below, by some force you felt my eyes on you and although there were hundreds of people around that day, you looked up right at me. The smile on your face when you saw me could light up a thousand cities. Your friends followed your gaze and looked up and when they saw me they smiled knowingly. I remember how I rushed down to meet you and one of your colleagues asked "is she the one?" And you looked at me and smiled so confidently and lovingly, and simply said "Yes". Immediately we left them and retreated to a world of our own, that night, at the water-side in Ikoyi where we spent hours talking about everything and nothing till midnight crept on us and we had to leave.
But just as they say, when something feels too good to be true then it probably is. I remember that day like it was yesterday. We woke up together, when he dropped me off he kissed me and told me he loved me. He called me during break at work, as he always did, and promised to call me once work was over, as he always did also. Once again, he told me he loved me, and he missed me terribly and couldn't wait to see me.... That was the last time Obi ever called me.
When he didn't call me at the close of work I thought nothing of it but when hours later he still hadn't called, and wasn't returning my calls, I knew something was wrong. I remember that night like it was last night, he didn't take my calls and when I had run out of credit, having called his friends wondering if my Obi was ok, I finally called him with my brother's phone, a number he didn't have. Obi answered on the first ring.
Long story short Obi varnished from my life just as magically as he appeared in the first place. Nothing I did would bring him back and the months that followed were months of depression, confusion and my self-esteem at a new low.
Obi has been on my mind almost everyday since then. Partly because there was no closure and the way things ended just made no sense at all. I've thought of him so much ever since and remember every minute detail of our lives together, so it's one of life's great ironies that when I ran into Obi last month, he had no recollection of who I am. (Ouch!)
An Anon commented saying "Behind your brash facade is a woman desperately searching for her fairytale love.". And while I'm not aware that I have a "brash facade" I am actually desperately searching for love. Anon do NOT get it twisted, I don't and will never hide that truth. Its one one my desires to love and be loved in return, (as is everyone else's).