*Dee called at 2pm. Let me come and get you from work, then you'll take us to the movies. I told him OK, knowing fully well I had no money to spend, but God forgive me, I needed a ride home. I'd been wondering all day how I would get home as my colleague whom I usually go with wasn't at work. Dee came at 5 and I told him sorry, boss man was meant to pay today but he didn't. Dee was super pissed but seeing as he's always forming "always in control of my emotions" he calmed down and seethed in silence.
Personally I didn't feel up to seeing a movie, just wanted to get home. But off to the Palms we went. I was starving so he bought me a meal and then we got our movie tickets and 3D glasses for X-Men, our pop corn and sodas. Please you need to see this X-Men movie. Mystique is so amazing and this was all about Mystique, now played my Jennifer Lawrence. I'm a fan of Jennifer Lawrence but I prefer Rebecca Romijn as Mystique.
I got to do all those things that you lucky shidren do at the movies, hold hands, lean on his shoulders, make out, snuggle, whisper rubbish, giggle etc. not necessarily because I wanted to but because I thought, ok now I don't just get to watch people do, I get to do it too! LOL.
The movie ended and Dee and I waited for the hall to clear out to avoid the rush. Well it was almost empty and Dee was still calmly sitting down, looking at the credits. I got up and demanded we go. He smiled and shook his head. "Whatever, I'm out of here. I don't know what's wrong with you, please move, let me pass" I snapped at him irritably and scuffled out of the row, stepping on his feet in the process. I thought I'd gotten my mood swings under control. One minute I was cozy and comfy, giggly and cheery. The next minute I was rude, irritable and ill-tempered. As soon as I got out I felt terribly guilty. Poor guy did nothing at all to deserve that from me but I couldn't help it. My mood swings used to be legendary but I put a lot of work into keeping them away. I still have vivid recollections of blog reader Keke telling me back then, at age 16/17 "Nwando you have terrible mood swings". I always denied it but one day I finally admitted it to myself. Unfortunately sometimes it creeps up on me and one minute I'm shining my teeth, the next I'm positively insufferable and irritable and you would do yourself some good to stay away from me during that period.
We drove to my place in silence and when we reached, I didn't want to leave things the way they were. And then I chose the 'the best form of defence is attack' strategy. "Why are you so quiet? What did I do? Open your mouth and say what's on your mind abeg..... What was wrong with you sef, how can a movie end you're still sitting there and looking? What were you waiting for? Are you that selfish, you should know I had a long day at work. And then I have to go home and get ready for tomorrow. Besides I was so pressed I needed to pee and you just sat there, staring!"
By the time I was done Dee wasn't sure whether to stay angry or apologize. He finally mumbled that he wasn't a mind reader and I should have explained. Then I finally apologized. "I'm sorry, I was tired and I needed to pee and the movie was over and,.... I just got irritated. Sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you or disrespect you. It wasn't intended to upset you, I'm sorry".
How does one completely get mood swings under control? More often than not I find myself apologizing for something I said or did when my mood swang. My closest friends are very used to it and they just dismiss it saying "your brain has started to touch again, abi?" But then they keep a safe distance till the storm blows over.
BTW If you go to the movies check out X-Men. As usual after watching X-Men I find myself wishing I had super powers and I wonder which I would like to be. I think I will like to be Mystique and change into anyone I want. Or the Professor and read people's minds and get into their heads and control their minds. Which X-Men will you like to be?
Please forgive any errors, I cannot reread this write up. I'm way to tired, I just hope I've managed to make even just a tiny bit of sense.