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Thelma Asks... On The Rape Of Men.

Maybe I'm a tad ignorant but I think the right word should be clueless. I'm clueless in this regard. Last night while I was struggling to stay awake till midnight and say (fire) some prayers LOL, to keep me awake I decided to scheme through my ever faithful Thought Catalogue. I read an article on why feminism isn't about gender equality. The writer made some arguably valid points but no, that's not what this post is about.

He mentioned something about Male Rape and how less women are convicted for it than should actually be. At this point I stopped to think. I hear about men getting raped and I never think about it past surface level. Most times it's with a tiny voice sniggering "yeah right" in the recess of my mind in an exaggerated tone. But seeing it in the context of the article it was obvious that this is pretty serious and so I was forced to think. 

As a lawyer my first definition of Rape was as defined in the Criminal Code and based on that definition only a man can rape. So my mind, obviously following that thought pattern struggles to understand how a woman rapes a man. It seems almost physically impossible. Does she force him to become aroused, force his penis to become erect, force him to penetrate her, force him to move in and out of her/massage her genital with his? Remember that once again, it's almost physically impossible for a woman to overpower a man. 

How exactly is a man raped by a woman? Do you think the time has come for a Review of the Nigerian Criminal Code? Should the law begin to recognize male rape victims. (This calls to mind the story of a man in Benue , in 2012, who on returning late at night from a beer parlour was raped to death by his six wives. Of course these women may have been charged with manslaughter but certainly not rape as that isn't recognized in Nigerian law.). Also in reviewing the Criminal Code do you think it should also recognize a man being raped by another man? 

But first, is it possible for a man to be raped by a woman?


  1. Yes of course.. a man can be raped by a woman. a woman can drug a guy which can stimulate an erection and he's been taken advantage of. that is rape. You can choose not to act but you cannot choose not to react.
    and as for your previous question..of course the criminal code should recognize a man being raped by a man.. same goes to female raping a female.. these things happen. The problem is most men won't come out to say they were raped, also being physically abused by their spouses. As long as both parties were not willing to have sex and one is being forceful it is rape.

  2. Like you said, it's physically impossible but it happens. I think women use other ways like drugging him, tying him up etc. it's unfortunate sha. As for the man that was raped to death, why have six wives if you cannot satisfy them all?

  3. i should imagine that only statutory rape is applicable to males- ie sex with an under-aged boy.

  4. I doubt it, maybe with university students..not sure, just kinda alien to us in Nigeria. Most guys out there will willingly surrender, and it wont be rape anymore.

    On something else, is it better using a lawyer as an executor when you draw up a will? I got into discussion with some folks and expectedly had diverse opinions.

  5. execution means to sign a document thus making it legally binding, the owner of the will must execute it. the will should also be witnessed by two other persons,who are not beneficiaries to it, they must not be lawyers but it is advisable that the lawyer who drafted the will in the first place should act as one of the witnesses.
    sorry,T had to answer this for u..too much law is turning my brain:)

  6. Uche I think you may be mistaken. Isn't the Executor of a will the person in whose hands the Testator places his estate, to distribute his properties , assets, settle his debts etc after he passes on? If I'm correct then Wale, no it doesn't have to be a lawyer although it may be preferable if it is. Sometimes the executor needs to hire a lawyer if he isn't one.

    1. Thelma, thanks for the clarification

  7. ohhh, that executor..true but that is after the death of the testator.i was looking at it another way. u r right


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Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
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He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
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American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
See how you are serious dey read this story....!

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That mail that someone sent me a few weeks back. 
But why on earth should a man sleep with his son's fiancé? But what am I saying, some men even sleep with their daughters...

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