Skip to main content

26 and HIM (TTRWT) - By Uju Beibe




I had just turned 26 when every bone in me screamed marriage.
I had picked out my wedding dress, my wedding songs, my hall decor everything was already in place and I was very convinced he was soon gonna make me the queen of his castle.
I loved him dearly, he was all I could think of and all I knew I cared for and deep down I knew he loved me too and couldn't wait for me to be his forever.
He however didn't exist at this point.
I knew he wasn't  *Greg (the guy I was kicking it with that period)
I knew he could be *Iggi.



Iggi and I had dated some years before and obviously fate brought us back together so it definitely was Iggi it had to be him so I left Greg to be with Iggi.
Then some writer messed with fate's design and threw*HIM in my path.
HIM was definitely it. The right age (10yrs older), he was every inch a man I could definitely marry.
After 6weeks of courting over the phone, he came back to Nigeria just to see me, his soon to be bride.
He was it, generous, sensitive you name it plus a divorcé yes HIM is a divorcé or so he told me.
I listened to HIM go on and on about how his oyibo wife left him for her junky ex, calling the cops on him and taking away his two boys and everything else you can think of. I was his sounding board and I didn't care for I had all this love for him.
Well he came back and we hit it off he was just it. Then he wanted to meet my people but even I who knew I was going to be married at 26 felt it was too soon for we needed to court some more. 

He went back to Aussie fastforward 2weeks later I told him the good news, we were expecting our first child.
He was over joyed but angry with me for not letting him meet my people.
It took me about 3months to tell my ppl about him and our baby. They weren't happy he was a divorcé and I had gone ahead to get pregnant but they were glad I was happy.
So I went off to law school and he came back and started the traditional rites
One beautiful morning I woke up from a terrible nightmare and found I was wet. Well I must have wet myself I thought to myself but I was also feeling my baby kick. All was well and so I dashed off to class.
Amara kicked all through the morning (he was convinced we were gonna have a girl and he had always wanted one so he named her Amara which means Grace).
At noon I had wet myself again so I thought I should head to the clinic in school to know why I was wetting myself and Amara wouldn't stop kicking.
Well 3days later I gave birth and it was indeed a girl our Amara but Amara didn't come to stay I buried her, she was only 4month and 2weeks old for that was how far my pregnancy would last.

Then HIM came to abj to see me 3days after the burial and left the next morning and he was gone with the wind.
He left me but he wasn't supposed to, he was gonna do for me what I stayed up all night doing for him.
He was gonna let me cry and console me and promise me all would be well.
It was as if the "twin towers" crumbled down on me. For the first time in my life I was hurt nothing I had ever been through prepared me for what was to come.

Well he left and our wedding was called off and as I was touching each letter to sum up this article, I took a journey to the past and I relived that experience and I wondered how I got the strength to live through  it and get over it. I can only say it was God, He's indeed a comforter and peace giver.
I really don't wish that experience on my worst enemy but all is well now and I hope it ends well too.

Comments

  1. awwww. sad. life goes on dear. we grow through what we go through. he was never the one for ya.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Terrible writing. It was really difficultt reading this. Gave me a headache.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. it really wasn't my intention, i hope you;ve had something for the headache hopefully next time i don't cause you anymore headaches

      Delete
  3. Sorry dear! Affliction shall not return 2 us a second time.prepare 2 dance 2 d glory of God!cos dats d next step

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Anon 5:43pm

    Whether youre an asshole, a writing critic, some 12 year old kicking around online, an arsenic old bitch with spiked panties and a nail-studded vibrator in her kitty, OR who gives the FUCK!, please STOP that bile thats inside you from dripping down here.

    Someone goes through so much and you complain about the writing style?
    Lord Have Mercy!!!. I wanna spank you till your black ass blushes pink.

    @Uju Beibe: Your Boo cometh soon. Just hang on there - O.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmao!!!!! @ I wanna spank you till your black ass blushes pink... And please don't be angry for someone else. Thanks

      Delete
  5. Anon 8:06 I LOVE U! I LOVE U some more!!! Thanks for putting that "Nama" anon 5:43 in his/her place.
    It's sad when people can't differentiate fiction from reality. This story is IT. It explains Pain, Strength & hope.
    Yet ur premature jelly brain couldn't grasp a lil emotion. *SPITTING on U till u drown in My saliva* Tufiakwa gi.
    Let that headache blind/Kill U there!!! Miserable bat.

    God forgive me but YES!!! I feel better.

    Now to Uju darling, I Am glad to know there are still a lot of VERY strong women out there!
    U are officially one girl I will love to meet at our End of year get together!
    Like U said, God is all U need. He'll satiate ur heart will ALL it's amazing desires. Keep hoping Love...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. i appreciate every uplifting comment here, but ruthie yours just stood out. i think i'm in love with you *no homo oh.

      Delete
  6. Uju dear, keep your head up and smile. I pray God puts unending joy in your heart and fills your mouth with laughter. All will be well IJN. #Enjay#

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yayyy. Enjay is back. U left without telling us...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Phone issues. It hasn't been resolved but I get to read the blog everyday. Though I don't comment much and its partly related to my second comment.#Enjay#

      Delete
  8. Dear Thelma, Sanitation is much needed here now. I hope you understand... Too much hate and I keep wondering where its coming from. And by the way, Surulere is central as well as Ikeja and Yaba. #Enjay#

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Enjay what can I do about it? I'm often tempted to delete some comments but I'm just hoping the blog will self-cleanse with time. And if it doesn't then I guess when the time comes we'll do the needful.

      Delete
  9. May i use this opportunity to apologize for not being as frequent as i should be. but i promise after my exams next week i'll try to catch up and keep up with the stories and comment.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Uju bia, you shouldn't even be here at all till after your exams. Please study hard so that you can give me some tutorials when I'm taking mine, next year hopefully. (I'm still scared of that financial management thingy sha... It's the reason I haven't taken it yet).

      Delete
  10. Glad to read that all is well now, imagining the pain was painful enough! May it end well, very well for you.

    ReplyDelete
  11. i don't know if it's just me but i think there is something about this blog................ something "healing" and selfless and comforting. i hope i'm not the only one who feels this way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're not the only one. :D

      Wake up, thelmathinks; break at work, thelmathinks; before bedtime, thelmathinks. Truly a BLOG with so much to learn from.

      Delete
    2. Lol. Thanks Memphis. Uju I wish I could hug you in person (I misssssssssss you!) but an e-hug would have to do for now.

      Delete
    3. @memphis, i thougyt i wa the only one o! T, hmmmmmm.......you shal tell us what you have done to us o! I keep coming back here because it"s refreshing and fires up one's imagination. God bless u T!
      I hope the date for the shindig will favour me o! I really dont care for the location.

      Delete
  12. So sorry for your pain and happy for your strength. Your own boo is definitely on the way. Kpele dear

    ReplyDelete
  13. It's not just U Uju, some Sincere people here do. Mostly bcos some of us see ourselves through T's posts. Most of which strengthen our resolve to REMAIN STRONG.
    Enjay is right though, We need sanitation.

    *Still spitting on that Anon btw*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like u and your comments Ruthy but wishing someone dead and I quote 'let that headache blind/Kill U there!!! Miserable bat' is really disturbing. I strongly believe in freedom of expression and that's how that anon felt about the post. I know you want to quickly jump and defend but let's sit back a litttle and think before spewing. What you have said is even worse dan the anon's comment. I had to point this out. Iv said my peace.

      Delete
    2. Hmmm thank God I was not the only one who noticed this. I am SOOO veru glad that Ruth's true colours have come out. For u to wish sumone dead just goes to show the sorta wicked heart Ruth has and wowww I now totally get y her relationships never worked out. U can't be wicked and annoying at the same time, biko Nne'm pick a struggle.

      Delete
  14. Yes, I agree we need sanitation.Recently I have been wondering if I am on LIB or still here.

    This blog is like a breath of fresh air for me, haters should just not come and corrupt it!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Errrm Ify, I'll respect ur opinion.
    But u know just 10% of what this Anon has said.
    If this Anons statement was to me, i'll simply shrug & move on but to Someine else in something so sensitive, am Sorry but what I said is even mild...

    My opinion / piece too! I Like U too Ify.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stop being paranoid idiot. It's not even close to who u think, u stink, that's all.

      Delete
  16. That Anon is bitter.I think the best way to deal with her is to ignore her.@ Uju,I'm speechless.God makes all things beautiful in his time.Yours will not be an exception.Nwamaka

    ReplyDelete
  17. Everything becomes beautiful in his time.

    We need cleansing on "our" blog. Some bile spitting humans are trying to take over. We no go gree!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is a public blog and there's nothn you can do about it so stop ranting. Thelma needs traffic that's why you neva see her approving the cleansing bullshit. I'm sure Thelma is somwr laughing at u lot and your silliness, feeling like a click lol. Wake up and smell the coffee. Don't spoil blog market for Thelma abeg.

      Delete
    2. Anon on the contrary I'm not laughing. Yes, I love the traffic but not the hate or bullying. I'm always tempted to delete hurtful comments and the reason I don't is because I don't want to stifle anyone. But I'm worried we're getting to a point where I might need to do that. A bigger problem is that I just do not have the time or energy, I need to make some major cash before this years ends and when I think about that, (deleting) comments is just not primary.

      Delete
    3. Thelma don't let this ass lickers control ur blog like dey did with Aunty Eya of wivesconnection and almost messed up her blog. Telling her to delete comments or approve this and that. If they so want to command how you blog den dey shud go open ders. Treat your blog only the way you want it to be run. Don't let these friends-wannabes tell u what to do.

      Delete
    4. I absolutely agree with you. @anon 11.29pm... Let the blog be, if you've got ideas share it. Otherwise, go and open urs

      Delete
  18. I have a question. Why the assumption that all anons are just 1 person and also the assumption that all TTWRS posts are real life stories? #Confused Anon

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good question, please Thelma, are all TTRWT posts non fiction? because i would love to send in something. And yes please, we do need some cleansing in this blog, i hardly comment on here, i'm a terribly shy person (i'm amazed at how you are introverted but still super amazing and fun), the comments here these days is not what i've known Thelmathinks for. Please do something about it and people, i'm sure we can express ourselves without all the bitterness and hate and insults, really.

      Delete
    2. Veevian TTRWT is whatever you want to write; fact or fiction. So far most stories that I've posted are real and not fiction. All except one which was obviously a story. So send in whatever you feel like, anything at all.

      Delete
  19. So sorry 4 ur pain @uju,bt d ryt man is on his way dats y d fake had to go.D lord is ur strenght.I̶̲̥̅̊
    just love d comfort dis blog gives,pls let's nt corrupt it wit spiteful comments.looking forward to seeing a lot of U̶̲̥̅̊
    guys.thelma I̶̲̥̅̊
    stl insist yaba is central enuf.#steffi#

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anon 10:57, if u've been long on this blog, u'll find out that the Posts explain themselves at the end...

    It it's fiction, it's stated.

    The above story, is Uju's true life story.
    People are looking for closure on this blog, so no Anon should mess it up.

    Any bile comment is attributed to that 1st Insane anon...

    ReplyDelete
  21. Uju I think you are an excellent writer. I can't begin to imagine your pain. I pray you find someone that would make all these sad story seem like a hurdle you had to jump to meet him. He would make you happy beyond words and the kids you guys would have, would be Awesome! IJN

    ReplyDelete
  22. Aww uju, that which doesn't kill u, makes u stronger.
    I'm glad u r doing better. I can imagine d pain u went tru.
    He makes all things beautiful in his time indeed, keep putting ur trust in God, your story will surely end in praise. Xoxo.

    ReplyDelete
  23. What a sad story.
    Wishing you Uju, better experiences.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Uju beibe,God isn't through with you and I know it will all end in praise,you have truly being through a lot..may God continue to strengthen you. And bless you with one of his best creations..

    ReplyDelete
  25. The essence of sharing stories and life experiences is to give one hope that all will be well. When people tell their stories, fiction or not, it kind of puts another's pain and disappointment in perspective making you realise that it could have been worse.

    My friends, Thelma is doing a good job here! Yes, agreed, the traffic will be nice but she hasnt gone the path of gossip and celebrity bashing and all them annoying nude things everywhere. It wont hurt to keep the unneccessary expletives and cussing out of here. I was attracted to this blog because of the freshness.
    Please, i beg of all of you, let's keep it clean.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Eazee E. We'll give adequate notice so that if you'll like to attend you'll enough time to plan.

      Delete
  26. Dear Uju, I salute your courage (and that of other TTRWT contributors) for putting up this experience. I have written something but do not have the courage to send it forward.....don't blame me abeg.
    Thank God for the gift of TIME which heals all wounds. I'm glad you have healed considerably well. Please, for the next one, let your head and not your heart rule and guide your decision. Wish you all the best.
    -F

    ReplyDelete
  27. @ Uju u know where u are and will always be with me! Nvr worry abt hime cos the great HE wld perfect all that concerns U! ( and in d meanwili we can always hve TUSH! *wink)

    ReplyDelete
  28. Uju God will give you double for all the trouble of the past. Amen.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I read this and words escaped me. What an experience! You truly are a strong woman Uju, may all your bitter memories be wiped away with beautiful ones. Before long, this shall fall into the recess of your mind. Please don't let this experience close you up to trusting men; the right 'HE' will sure come your way and you will recognize him when he comes. I pray for the spirit of discernment for you. Keep soaring and go dazzle in your exams...

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Turia Pitt Suffered 65% Burns But Loved Conquered All...

Amazing Story Shared by Dr. Ben Carson on Facebook, i thought it is inspiring and i decided to share;

The Australian ex-model Turia Pitt suffered burns to 65 per cent of her body, lost her fingers and thumb on her right hand and spent five months in hospital after she was trapped by a grassfire in a 100 kilometre ultra-marathon in the Kimberley. Her boyfriend decided to quit his job to care for her recovery. 
Days ago, in an interview for CNN they asked him:
"Did you at any moment think about leaving her and hiring someone to take care of her and moving on with your life?"

His reply touched the world:

"I married her soul, her character, and she's the only woman that will continue to fulfill my dreams."

***
This made me very reflective. I just wonder; if the person you love today encounters an incident or accident that transforms who they are physically, it could be amputation, it could be paralysis, it could be severe burns that scald their flesh beyond recognition, w…

#WriteRight. VIVIAN: MY FIRST SEX EXPERIENCE WITH MY BOYFRIEND

He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
LOVE THEM and watching the season film of The Secret Life of
American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
Kai!
See how you are serious dey read this story....!
My…

...

Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

One More Post...

THE ‘NEW’ SIDE CHICK: I WAS HER

A side chick is commonly known as a mistress or a woman that’s romantically involved with a man who is in a committed relationship.  However after doing some reflecting, I realize that’s not the only type of side chick.  I want to discuss “the new side chick”–a woman who decides to stay by a man’s side after he has expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words or actions.  So many women have made this mistake at least once in their lifetime, and unfortunately I’ve done the same thing. I like to think of the new side chick as an appetizer.  You’re there just to satisfy the immediate appetite of the man, but as soon as that mouth-watering entrée comes out to the table, you will get pushed to the side, literally.  Why?  Because that entrée is what he really wanted; he went to the restaurant to order steak, not hot wings.  You were just a placeholder, fling, temporary commitment, or  maybe even just a “good ol time” until what he really wanted was presented to hi…

Shhhhhhh....

I'm in an amebo mood tonight. Don't ask me, I honestly don't know why. Also I'd like to share too but I'd do that anonymously in the comment section. Tonight I want to talk about secrets. It's ok, we can all be anonymous. 
Is it true that EVERYBODY has a secret? 
Is there anyone here who doesn't have a secret? I'd really like to know; You're a completely open book and there's not ONE thing about you that you wouldn't mind other people knowing about? Please raise your hands up. 
And for the rest of us, what's something about you that no one knows, or very few people know? Who's got a dark secret here, or a weird one, or a funny one even? I really don't mean to be invasive but I don't want to be the only one sharing, plus I think hearing other people's secrets is quite fun, don't you think?

Let's Be Random Together! (Open Keypad).

Hey guys, a while back blog reader F said something about creating an Open Keypad post, where you can write whatever you want in the comment section. I thought it was a fun idea!
So who is interested? Comment on anything you feel like, ask me or anyone a question, talk about how your day went, your job, your interests, tell us something about you that we don't know, share a testimony with us, rant about anything you feel like, talk about your crush/boo/spouse/relationship/marriage, challenges you're facing, ANYTHING AT ALL! 
I'll only make one request; that we stay civil. 

(F it was you who made this suggestion, right? I'm not too sure and I can't even remember the post the comment was made on). 
BTW please Ejoeccome out come out, wherever you are!

Adventures, Fun, Friendship & Laughter at the TTB Hangout (Lekki Conservation Center).

Nicole to Clare: mummy lets go. I want to climb that ropy thing!

Isn't Clare beautiful?!

Uyi et moi. Clowning. 

Mother & child. 


Scary af! Trish on the ramp. The chica loves the outdoors so much, she was like a kid in a candy store. She and Uyi took this walk twice! More power to them, you can't pay me to do this a second time.


Uyi & Tiwa

Giveaway Finale!

Happy Sunday y'all. 
This is the conclusive part of #WCG. 
All the N25,000 recipients have received their cash.
All the students have also received their N10,000. 
Once again guys please comment under any of the posts, or this one that you've received your money. Thanks. 

So moving forward, this final giveaway contains 
1. N10,000 for 5 people. 

2. 3 kimonos from Julian's dressmakers. 
3. 3 pairs of Palm slippers from WaleOnibata. (Gents) 
4. 2 pairs of shoes from Courtney's Closet. (Ladies. Size 9 and Size 11). 

5. 1 human hair wig from Gabby's Wigs'n'Weaves. You pick from one of the wigs below. 
6. 3 cakes from CakesandCream 

7. A getaway at CitiHeight Hotel Ikeja for 3 people. (Who can each bring one person along).  


As I said earlier, Kon has already won a stay at CitiHeight and Clare, a kimono. So those gifts are now available for 2 people each. 
There is no competition. We are only going to play a game. 
I have each gift item listed out in numbers. Number 1 to 100. …