I was getting tired of hearing them complain, of the things their men did or didn't do. He doesn't call, he's too possessive, he's peepee is too small, too big, too curved. He's a one minute man, he takes forever to come. He stares at other girls when he's with me. He gets too jealous. He loves me too much. Sometimes I'd just want to ask them to shut up. At least you have someone to love you so what are you complaining about?
Look at me, fat and unloved. Never been touched or kissed or loved. *George seemed to love me. We spent hours chatting on the phone, talking about everything and nothing. In a few short weeks George became my everything. Only problem was that George had never seen me.
So we set a date to meet, nothing serious, just lunch. I warned him before hand; I'm a bit overweight George. To convince him I sent him some pictures but he said I looked beautiful to him.
Lunch was ok. George seemed distracted. It wasn't really what I had expected but I didn't mind. We talked and had a few laughs and I fell even harder for his cute face and boyish charms. Lunch soon ended and he said he would take me out the next night.
The next night I didn't hear from George. Didn't hear from him the next week or the next month either. Eventually I asked the friend who had hooked us up why George wouldn't take my calls or call me back. Reluctantly she confessed. That night after we met, George, her boyfriend and their other friends had dinner George said to her boyfriend "tell your babe never to hook me up with that sort of person again. She looks like a blimp!".
I thought George loved me but it turned out my weight had put him off me completely, and he told his friends I looked like a blimp, I, a blimp, a fat blow up doll... That hurt me no end.
It had been two years and I'd not found anyone who loved me. Till I met *Camron. And last night while we lay in bed and he started to kiss me I froze. "Let's put the lights off, please", I begged. I couldn't let him see me; my rolls of fat and my dimpled thighs. I couldn't bare to imagine the look of disgust on his face.
"No darling, I want to see you, all of you" Camron said sliding down my nightdress. I cringed as he kissed my lips, my neck and every inch of my body and as he made love to me I couldn't stop the tears that flowed; it was a mixture of pleasure and joy. Joy of both seeing the pleasure he was obviously getting from making love to me, and knowing that someone finally loved me for me.
Camron and I just celebrated our first year anniversary and are expecting our first child. I never got skinny but he helped me to eat better and takes long walks with me in the park, he also bought us bicycles which we ride together on Saturday mornings. I've lost some pounds and feel healthier.
I've learned that when someone loves you your looks don't matter. They love you for what's inside and not the body you inhabit. I've also learned that when someone loves you they'll do what they can to better or improve you and your life; be it helping you get fit, helping you do better in your career or academics, teaching you to love yourself, giving you a new wardrobe, encouraging you to pursue your dreams.... whatever it is you need to be a better version of you.
Yes. When someone loves you they accept you for who you are, they don't try to change you. No, they accept you and strive to make you the best version of you you can possibly be. That's what love is.
*fiction....sort of. *.
I'm really pitying myself, still awake by 3am when I have to wake up by 5am. The sad part is that I'm not remotely feeling sleepy. *sad face*.