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The Other Reason One Is Single That No One Ever Talks About...

Tonight I listened to Aunt Landa on Inspiration fm, my Lord she's simply fantastic! She asked singles to call/text/tweet and say why they think members of the opposite sex are still single, and if you're single, why do you think you're still single. 

After listening to a myriad of comments one thought struck my mind and it's one that's hardly ever talked about. I realize that this topic may be somewhat taboo but hey, I'm going to talk about it anyways.
Last year someone wrote to Stella Dimoko's blog about constantly having sex in her dreams, constantly eating in her dreams, having sex with a particular man, regularly seeing herself go through labour and delivering the baby and then someone comes and carries the baby away and when she wakes up her privates are very sore and painful, in reality never being able to have a relationship or hold on to a man etc. Dear Lord, it was not just the mail but the comments on that post! So many ladies wrote in and talked about having spirit husbands, presently or in the past. One particular lady commented on various failed relationships, how her relationships never lasted, the men just start to avoid her or distance themselves, for no reason at all the men end the relationships and move on to marry someone else. Then one of her Exs who wanted to marry her and ran away later told her why. He said that after he proposed to her he had a dream where he saw a man asking him to leave her alone but he ignored it. A few days later he lost his job. Then he had another dream with the same man asking him to leave her alone, once again he ignored it and a few days later he had a near-fatal auto accident. It was then that he put his shoes on his head and ran for dear life. 

Several people commented about spirit and marine husbands/wives and their encounters with them. (I'll put one of the comments below). The main feature is that their relationships constantly fail, the men they're dating just start to act irritated, funny, uninterested or tired and then break up for no reason and this happens over and over again. Some commented and talked about how these men (the spirit husbands) would come and warn them in their dreams when they're about to begin a new relationship and warn them not to date anyone because they're already married. The shocking part about this was the people that commented and said that they actually see their spirit husbands in real life. As in they come to warn them in person, in reality. 

I honestly did not believe this till sometime last year I decided to take some time out and go for the one week deliverance program in MFM's Prayer City and then I talked to and witnessed the testimony of someone who said that she had had a spirit husband who always frustrated her relationships and always came to warn her, both in her dreams and in reality, to end her relationships. She even said that during the deliverance program he came to her to warn her! I had goose pimples all over my flesh.

People don't usually talk about this. Some Christians don't believe that these things exist, they say there's nothing like spirit husband or spirit wife in the Bible, that same Bible says "my people perish for lack of knowledge", modern Pentecostal churches shy away from this topic and act like it doesn't exist, in fact I was shocked to hear Pastor Ituah Ighodalo preach about deliverance from spirit husbands and wives once on the radio. 

I've never had any such experience or encounter, never had any issues with sex in the dream, eating in the dream, or being visited by any strange man claiming to be my husband and warning me to stay away from any man but from what I've seen and heard, (even from close friends) I have cause to believe that this thing is real and could be one of the factors (albeit affecting a tiny population) hindering some people from settling down with their life partners. Below is one of the comments on Stella Dimoko's blog that I saved from last year. 

The comment:
Lyk I said earlier I use to suffer frm d same thing nd weneva he sleeps with me in d dream I would av an orgasm in real life just before I wake up, d whole twisting nd turning nd climax, I wld experience everything in real life nd den within weeks or days I wld get a big fianacial reward like he wz paying me. Honestly I use to enjoy it nd luk forward to it, till I joined mfm nd my eyes were open to d truth, I started becoming more serious in d church nd started praying nd he got angry, infact one nyt I dreamt of a man beating me, anoda tym a man wz shooting at me in d dream, at difrnt tyms a man wld be chasing me in d dreams, sometimes I wld be walking naked in d dream nd barefooted, nd den d eating nko?? Let's not even go dere, d question wz wat I wld eat wen I sleep not if I wld eat, I got fed all sorts of watnots untop ds spirit husband. I thot it wz a good thing, until God used my pastor to show me just how bright my future is nd dats why ds evil strongman doesn't want to let me go. I thank God for d power of prayers, I'm still battling him cos honestly its not easy, sometimes u just get tired of praying, nd u begin to cry nd wonder wat u av done to warrant all ds, nd dats for me dat doesn't even av kids oooo, how much more u. Plz u av to pray violently nd u av to pray ceaselessly, if not he will neva leave you. I became really serious with God wen d only guy dat I av loved with all my body nd soul left me for someone else with whom he now hz a child. Things were going on smoothly nd den suddenly we had a little argument nd dat wz it, I thot it wz a joke, I almost ran mad, I cried nd begged but yet nothing, infact he told me dat he just hated me nd he cldnt xplain why. Also weneva any guy I wz dating plans on helping me or doing anything big for me, we wld just suddenly av issues nd break up irreparably. Sometimes dey wld start xperiencing hardships fianacially. All deze re d work of d spirit husband. I've since moved on frm him by d grace of God cos I believe dat my own husband will not pass me by, dats why I av quickly gone to seek refuge in d temple of God. 

Oh well, I didn't do this to convince or confuse you, it's just one of my many thoughts. 

Have a good night lovers!


  1. Ifesinachi Okonkwo9:25 pm, June 28, 2014

    I don't believe it. I don't want to believe.

  2. The reason men were walking away is because of this silly mentality, dafuq is spirit husband??? Anybody that is so superstitious is a total turn off cos dt ll be thr approach to everything in life, always looking for who to blame for thr bad plans that eventually yield bad results. Aint no shit like spirit hubby or wife. The real problem is mental disorder or schizophrenia. Am out.

    1. I don't believe in imposing my personal convictions on others. Everything in the physical is being controlled in the spiritual, there are only two reasons you may not know this; you're an atheist or you're ignorant. It is understandable if you're an atheist but being ignorant is unpardonable.

    2. Am an atheist..... u smart *smiles*

    3. Hey Anon! Can we be friends? If you're cool with it please mail me (

  3. Mental illness or attention seeking superstitious people. Fake deceitful pastors and gullible congregations. Please.

    1. Gbam!
      I rest my case on Myne's comment.

    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

  4. Lol. Well,I'll comment as anonymous but yes,they are real...very!
    A friend told ME of how the dude visits her both in person and in real when she was younger. When she began to resis him,he told her dat she wld either not marry or never hv kids. Today she's got a 10yr old kid and the baby daddy aint the daddy (pls don't ask)
    Some mothers cld pass it to their daughter while for some,can't explain.
    For some,even if they do get married,either things start going bad financially ir they can't have kids ir they just start having marital issues.
    One of my newly married lectures in skl went for an mfm delivernce and my classmate who was a witness to that church event said the wife said whenever the hubby(lecturer) climbs her,she sees another mans face but after the deliverance,it stopped.
    Summary is: yes,shit happens. A lot of sick,twisted and scary shit happens. That u don't share a similar tale don't mean someone out there isn't experiencing it. Just keep right with God thru prayers...

    1. Dear God.
      Anon it's NOT me. U should how I type & as a Person there are things I DONT believe in, E.g this post.

  5. Tee it's so brave of you to raise this topic knowing that people will definitely call you names. I agree with Myne Whitman that there are false prophets and gullible congregation looking for answers to imaginary problems but these things do happen. Things happen that you can explain with neither science nor logic. Nigerians generally like to think everything is spiritual, not everything is spiritual. But whether you admit it or not, witchcraft and wizardry are real, and it's not just in Nigeria or Africa. Isn't Satanism a religion in itself in the Western world? I never believed in spirit husbands/wives till I had cause to see things with my own two eyes. Look at families for instance where all the daughters are close to 40 and none is married, or people who have been engaged almost ten times only to be dumped a few weeks to the wedding, I've met someone with that experience personally. There's not much to say, if you have problems please ask questions and take it to God, you might just find your answers in the process.

  6. Epistle time

    Brave of you to bring this up Thelma, and yes, no one talks frequently about it because it's mostly incomprehensible. And in most cases there're usually logical explanations for these kind of problems that actually make people wave it off. I'll give a peculiar example.

    Most of us are familiar with the common tales of ogbanje. For those who don't know, an ogbanje refers to a spirit child who re-incarnates and is delivered by the same woman after initially living for less than 8 years. The spirit repeats this cycle until its *mother reaches menopause. In order to stop this cycle the child is taken to a witch doctor who subdues it, in some cases. The witch doctor then gives strict instructions on how to manage the child's welfare so he/she lives fully. Some of these are: allowing him adequate ventilation, unnecessary stress through scolding, lots of pampering, less exposure to cold or rain, and so on. Now, notice how these are synonymous with sickle-cell kids. They usually die very young, and in order for them to survive and live longer, their parents have to do almost exactly the same things as those done for an ogbanje child. The *CYCLE* of an ogbanje could hence logically be explained as the constant conception and death of sickle cell kids if both parents have the AS or SS genes. So, do we now conclude that the knowledge of ogbanje is mere superstition? Absolutely not. Ogbanje is real as sand and water.

    If you believe in GOD, you should know HE has an extremely powerful adversary in Satan and his demons. We have an instance in the Bible were fallen angels had sexual intercourse with women and these women gave birth to children who would become giants. It clearly shows that beings of the spirit world can have earthly kids...can affect directly the affairs of our logical world. We've heard stories in the media of girls who have kids for dead men. So, in as much as I haven't got enough conviction on these tales of Spirit Husband, I'm not about to rule out it's possibility, and I urge all to do likewise. GOD and Miracles are real; satan and direct evil manipulations are also real. Be blessed.

  7. Ironically I almost instantly write off anything I hear about 'ogbanje' because as you've rightly said, when there are sickly or 'special' children it's usually attributed to ogbanje spirit especially when the parents are unenlightened. Meanwhile most times the child has bad health or is just overly hyperactive.
    This other issue, I cannot give any evidence as I've never and will never have any personal experience yet I have reason to believe that it's more than mere superstition. Memphis things happen that people just choose to ignore, I know of people who looked for children for so many years and when there was no success desperation drove them to the extreme, they go to white garment churches and they tell them to go and throw one thing or the other into the river. One month later wifey is with child. 21 years later you have a useless child on your hands and you have absolutely no idea what to do with him/her, you ask God why. Well, it wasn't God you gave sacrifice to for your child was it?, Thus... These are sensitive issues and therefore i won't get deep. I guess some topics are too delicate for blogs.

  8. No such thing as a spirit husband pls! Y must nigerians be different? And it has nothing to do with ignorance. Ppl need to understand that shit happens, things happen, ppl have luck and some don't. So what if a family has 4 girls all close to 40 and unmarried?really so what??? Does that mean they r unmarried cuz of spirit husbands?what if theyv just been unlucky in love?what if its by choice? All fingers aint equal. Spirit husband indeed. Pls let's wake up. That's y as a nation, nigeria is kinda stagnant. Just saying

    1. There is no need arguing about it. U will never understand until u have been in those shoes. Not everything is black and white. T you just wanted people to argue, u have succeeded. Goodnight.

  9. Thelma dis is picture nawa, the spirit husband used chain to tie the woman....lmao. I ll agree with the anon that said not everyone is lucky in love. I dont like when pple ve problems they attribute it to spiritual, this shit has caused a lot of problem in some families, sm parents wont raise thr kids well and wen thr cousins start doing well, they ll say smone stole thr Destiny, smone is attacking them spiritually. Goshhh.....i cant deal abeg.

    1. The picture actually depicts something else but it's the only one I could find related to the topic. I agree the Nigerians can be a bit singleminded, blaming everything on spirits and witchcraft, people have mental illnesses and rather than go to the psychiatric home they take them for deliverance, a lazy man is poor and instead of finding something to do he says they're chasing him from the village, one's child is repeatedly ill and immediately they say it's ogbanje spirit. This thinking is very backward and causes a lot of harm, in fact it holds you back instead of allowing you to move forward. But like someone said, not everything is black and white.

    2. If you believe there is God then there is also devil.devil has powers and we children of God must be alert and prayerful.

  10. I never believed the Ogbanje thing until my first cousins ( who were SS) confessed to being Ogbanjes. That they came from the spirit world to suffer their parents. 3daughters o. My parents stopped us from going to visit them. We thought it was a joke till they started dying months after each other just before they clocked 21.. My aunt is something else now. It's really sad. They even confessed to doing things that aided them getting sick very often. Very brilliant girls that could have been the pride of the family.
    Memphis' illustration of demons having earthly kids is also very real. You need to open your ears to what actually goes on in the real world not what you see on TV, then you will know scary things happen..

  11. See where westernization and oyinbo believe is leading us those shit is real like bread and butter,we better thank God we never witnessed it..mewa n sele

  12. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    1. Because u ve seen that there are people on this blog that are superstitious, u have brought ur 419 here. Chai.... There is God oo. Thelma pls delete this evil post by this fraudster trying to mislead gullible people. Ur sins ll surely catch up with you. miss fatima ko!

  13. Honestly, as much as I want to shut up about this issue or join the bandwagon in the theory that it's just hallucination, I believe it happens.
    I believe the spiritual rules over the physical and there lots of things we humans just seem to explain away.
    I'm typing with my phone so I can't say much but, I know this happens.
    I really think that a spiritually aware person would be wary of A Lot if things- eating in the dream, making live- I became spiritually aware at a young age (cos i had evil extended relations) and so I could detect when something that isn't supposed to happen was. That doesn't mean I live in fear, I'm just aware.
    I blow tongues in my dreams and, sometimes, the force of my prayer wakes me up.
    I don't pray anyone be surrounded by evil forces but, these things are as real as the fact that Jesus dues and released us from all of that spiritual captivity. He FREED us and so, the fact that anyone still may seem under a bondage just goes to show that you haven't really believed.
    You are literally FREED once you not only believe but WORK your belief(faith).
    When I hear people say these things aren't real, I really an speechless- but that is why and where the gospel comes in. That isn't why the world us in chaos and things that aren't right are all up in our faces and wanting a "right" to exist.
    Can't type longer. Tired much

    1. Abeg forgive all my numerous typos- I literally hate this phone (when I need to write now sha) and the auto correct us bad.
      *Jesus died.
      *making love.
      Abeg, correct the rest, I'm really tayad.

    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    3. Abeg dido scram. D fact dat u believe sumthin dsnt mean we all should, bye!

    4. hey dido. how are you doing? your health and all. ive missed reading your blog and was wondering if there was a way i could reach you or your blog via email or something. please let me know. thank you.

  14. While I'm not so sure about spirit husbands, I am about ogbanjes. Or how else does one explain a woman birthing a male child who dies at same age 4 times, was advised to perform some things and burn a part of the child and alas! He came again with burns!!
    Devil dey o!
    But I also agree that in these parts of the world, we're very superstitious to our detriment.

  15. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  16. You see Nwando, my grandmother was a herbalist. And amongst her 'areas of specialization' is the 'settlement' of Spirit Husbands. You see this thing is REAL! And I have been around sometimes when women with such issues visited her. One striking similarity between most of them is: in their various villages, there is a known River. Hence, the marriage to the Spirit Husbands. Granny would always tell me- "Nnaa, as we live here on earth...and get married,there are others under the earth, doing the same thing."

    I've always told people, "that you don't believe something or in it does not make it non-existent...". For instance, the atheist's view and the existence of God.

    Now, after consultations, the Spirit Husband makes some demands, a ransom sort of, in consideration of setting the woman free. Sometimes such demands are made repeatedly, for you see, some of them can be really clingy, stubborn-and jealous (in granny's words). "They cannot let go of their lovers just like that", granny would intone.

    Chief amongst what they normally demand is: old coin. Usually the 'Ten kobo' coin- the one with a whole on it. That is 'ten kobo kpopuru akpopu'. They are specific about it. Granny said they use it in buying and selling. Others are usually dolls, red and white clothes, a small coffin and somethings that will leaving you thinking: "where on earth can I find this!". Example: the egg of an eagle.

    There is a lot about it unknown to me.

    Well, like I said earlier, it is REAL. The best thing is for the person with such issue to find solutions as soon as possible. The earlier the better.

  17. My name is Rebecca Miller I'm from united state, i have been married for 4 years and i have a break up with my husband 3 months ago and i was worried and so confuse because i love him so much. i was really going too depressed and a friend directed me to this spell caster Dr. Laco and i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come back to the house. i have never in my life believe in spell and but now it have just helped me and i am now so happy. All Thanks to him and if you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his emailAddress( i am so happy to testify of your work and kindness

  18. My name is karen tanya, i live and work in Oxford shire, UK. My life is back!!! After 2 years of Broken marriage, my husband left me with two kids, I felt like ending it all, i almost committed suicide because he left us with nothing, i was emotionally down all this while. Thanks to a spell caster called Dr. okuta the spell caster which i met online. On one faithful day, as I was browsing through the internet, I came across several of testimonies about this particular spell caster. Some people testified that he brought their Ex lover back, some testified that he restores womb,cure cancer,and other sickness, some testified that he can cast a spell to stop divorce and also spell to get a good paid job so on. He is amazing, i also come across one particular testimony, it was about a woman called Vera, she testified about how he brought back her Ex lover in less than 2 days, and at the end of her testimony she dropped his email.After reading all these, I decided to give it a try. I contacted him via email and explained my problem to him. In just 48hours, my husband came back to me. We resolved our issues, and we are even happier than ever.Dr.okuta you are a gifted man and i will not stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man. If you have a problem and you are looking for a real and genuine spell caster, Try him anytime, he is the answer to your problems. you can contact him on


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