It's a mystery to some friends how I'm so comfortable and content in my aloneness; being single, even at my age. I never did see myself as someone who'll shy away from love or turn her back on love because of past experiences and failed relationships, but somehow I find I'm happy with the way things are, and when I think about past experiences I'm even happier because when I'm alone, when I've got no feelings and no expectations I know I won't get hurt or disappointed. Add to that the fact that in my last two relationships I was happier when I was single than when I was in them.
Some stories I've shared with you guys, some I keep to myself, others I try hard to blot out of my memory. It's been a while since I felt anything for anyone. But everyday I see, read and hear stories of people going through the trauma of a failed relationship or love once reciprocated, now unrequited.
Last night I listened in on Aunt Landa's show. Yesterday's show was basically for callers who are going through hurt or a difficult period in life to call in and talk. Guys one particular call broke my heart. It wasn't the caller's story; we've all either had, heard or experienced similar stories. It was the pain in the caller's voice. The way she cried so wretchedly and hopelessly all through the call, as though her life had come to an abrupt end. The caller is a 22 year old lady. She said she was a virgin even though all her friends had lost theirs and kept mocking and teasing her for keeping hers. She said she'd met guys and had dated a few but they all left her, always, because she refused to have sex with them. But alas she found one! He was loving, caring, and didn't mind the fact that she was a virgin. They began a relationship and she soon fell in love with him. Everything was perfect and soon he began to talk about marriage and build up her hopes for the future. So the young woman, thinking she had a husband let her guard down and gave up her virginity to him. Unfortunately a while after they had sex the man began to change, he began to neglect her and their relationship. Then suddenly he said he wasn't interested in it anymore. That was when she found out that her lover and hubby-to-be is married with three kids.
I can't believe the extent some men are willing to go for sex.
Anyways someone called me today with another sad story. After dating her man for 5years he suddenly says it's over, out of the blues. She's confused, distraught and devastated. When we spoke she sounded almost like she wasn't even sure what was going on around her anymore, you know the way someone who is in shock sounds.... What words can you say to heal a wound that fresh and raw? 'Sorry' just doesn't cut it! Advice at that point is as useless as the K in Knot. Assurances sound empty and contrived. Promises of a better tomorrow sound like the biggest lie that ever was told.
All I could do was listen to her cry.
Have you ever been heartbroken? Have you ever experienced the pain of heartbreak? How did you cope? How does one move ahead? How do you deal with being heartbroken? Does time really heal all wounds?
Please share your story.