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Mbong and I... What's a Girl To Do?

I'm soooooooooooo sorry people. I'm slacking majorly and I know it but hey, if I could help it I would. To worsen matters just as things were easing up I got hit by a bad case of the flu and fever. So that's just not helping. It also sucks majorly because I'm supposed to be going on this hot "date" tonight. Oh well... 

Yesterday afternoon I had to go and do something on the mainland and when I was done I figured I had some time on my hands and decided to use the opportunity to see my friend *Mbong. Mbong has been my friend since I was 17. I remember the first day we met, I'd been seeing her around but we never spoke. My then boyfriend was out of town and my life was boring. On one of our very numerous phone calls I complained of the boredom and he said it was my fault; QC was over and I needed to start making new friends. He accused me of not trying so to shut him up I vowed that by the time he got back to town in a week, that girl we always see around would be my good friend. And then I started going on frequent strolls, hoping to run into her. Eventually I saw her and went to 'toast' her. "Hello, please do you have any novel?" I'd asked. And the rest, as they say, is history. She didn't have any novels, she however gave me something better; long lasting friendship.

From that moment till date Mbong and I have been very close. We were both virgins then and I remember those evenings we'd sit outside her compound and swear that no man will ever see our panties till we get married, we'll both be like "I can't even imagine opening my legs for one stupid boy. God forbid!". LOL. Well mine went some years before Mbong's. She was always kind of a goody-two-shoes by the way, so much so that when she finally did it (at 23) she felt so guilty that she called her mum and her sisters and told them what just happened, crying all the while. She cried so much they even began to sympathize with her. As if that wasn't enough she reported herself to her pastor and her department in church, the choir. 

So you can imagine my surprise at yesterday's conversation. My friend had lost a great deal of weight and while that's everyone's dream these days, hers was not as a result of any diet, but a great deal of stress. In fact she was home during the day because she had broken down at work and had to take time off. I wanted to grab my ill friend and take her somewhere everything was perfect. We began to bitch about life and how this life is not at all what we had expected. How we prayed for jobs but now we have the jobs and the jobs are threatening to kill us (her, more than me), and how she needed a new job. It was then we began to curse out people working with Federal government agencies and parastatals like Customs, Immigration, NIMASA, NCC etc. We bitched about their inflated salaries and allowances while getting to work at 9am and leaving at 4pm and doing little or nothing in between. (Mind you neither of us know these to be facts but just spoke based on the perception most people seem to have of federal government agencies). We both begged God for connections, and then I told Mbong about a certain Captain who could place me there in a heartbeat. Unfortunately the one thing he wants is the one thing I cannot give. It was then Mbong, my fellow 'abstainer' said "Nwando I'm not asking you to do anything but if I see someone who wants to sleep with me to put me in (Customs) I won't even think twice about it. I will do it!". Mbong also said "After all it's not like there's any virgin here. Doesn't it make more sense to have sex with someone and have something to show for it, instead of sleeping with one guy that will still spend your money after and still break your heart?"

"Do you think God blesses people based on how good or bad they are?" She asked. And yes we both agreed that God doesn't. The "carefree" seem to be winning in fact. 

I would really like that job. Should I, as Mbong suggested do the do and beg God for forgiveness and resume abstinence afterwards? Didn't Dr Lanre Olusola once mention something similar; taking a break from celibacy/abstinence and then going back to it when you wanted to? (It's been several weeks since that show so maybe I'm mixing things up). 

Isn't this life too short to deprive oneself of the things you need to make and keep you happy? 



  1. My job wanted to kill me too plus I didn't have time for my home at all. I didn't cook for over a month at a time. My husband will get home 1pm while I get home 10:30-11pm. To resume work 5am the next day. No weekends off so I wasn't going to church at all. We always eat out. It was killing me. The job itself was very stressful on my pregnancy . It got to a point I just gave my resignation o. Didn't wait for it to kill me. Thinking of a business to do now.

  2. I hope when u enter Nimasa out of your own good qualifications, u wnt b disappointed in the rumours Goin round saying u slept wt captain to get the job! O, what a question u ask????

    1. Personally I don't know of anybody that got a job at NIMASA or other federal agencies by merit. It's always either parents connections, bribery or sleepin with an oga at the top. I'm not encouraging it, just telling u d way things are.

  3. I hope when u enter Nimasa out of your own good qualifications, u wnt b disappointed in the rumours Goin round saying u slept wt captain to get the job! O, what a question u ask????

  4. Blessings from GOD usually aren't weighed on how good a person is but punishments are most assuredly given to the less ignorant. It's why JESUS warned of a more severe judgment for misleading clergy, and also why the devil fell from Heaven "like lightening".

    It's frustrating when we don't get what we want...what we feel we deserve, but towing the path of evil to achieve our goals have NEVER and will NEVER be right with HIM, no matter how much we try to sugar coat/justify it. Fortunately grace abounds for us 'cos we're ignorant, but as St. Paul asked, do we continue with this sentiment because we know Grace abounds? Some escape punishment, some don't have such luck. But what we must understand is this; we can't be hoping on GOD for something and having a Plan B at the same time. There's no fillet joint with that. Be blessed all.

    1. Chop knuckle!

      We can't be hoping on GOD for something and having a Plan B at the same time..

  5. "We can't be hoping on God for something and having a plan B at the same time"..#word..really needed this 'cos I've been believing God for something and deep down,I already have/had a plan B planned out incase..thank God for Memphis who just reminded me of putting ALL my trust in God alone..

  6. My dear, I understand that it can be so annoying and frustrating feeling the way you do, especially when you know you can deliver.
    Who says the grass is greener at NIMASA. What if you get there and hate it. Your sacrifice would be for nothing.

    I know things are hard especially when you feel you should be on a certain level but you aren't.

    I was at Exxon Mobil the other day, see young ladies that were asking me for documents with respect to my work, common simple issues I wanted them to resolve them no fit, yet they collect clean pay and all the sweet thing, what can a sister do, Na God do am for them.

    I did a small act of kindness for an unknown person at the airport, a good samaritan saw me (Top Government Official). He was pleased with what I did and prayed for me and gave me correct cash (which i collect). He then proceeded to know more about me, after telling him what I do for a living, he promised to hook me up, all I had to do was name where I would like to work. Any company o.

    All this while, he dey quote bible for me that he is Godly and all. Eventually, the so called person that said he wants to help me due to my humility was asking for a relationship. I said I am married and cannot do such.

    He said, "Its not a big deal, other married women are doing it too" Thelma, I took a walk, I am not "Other married women" simple. And thats how the JOB Waka,, with my dignity intact. God will reward me soon, that is all I know.

  7. Oh T please DONT. It's not all about getting the job, cash, comfort etc.
    It's about how U feel about yourself in the end.
    A willful sin is too much burden for someone's conscience to bear. Esp a heart as pure as yours.
    Just DONT...
    God's blessings comes with NO pain! Patience sugar.

  8. Ifunanya Ekene.... i cld not comment with my google account

    1. My comment has disappeared *sad face*

  9. Dear anon 2;05pm I am tempted to say, you are the last of your kind. Thelma, please let your cookie remain in the jar it has been and do not open until you have the right reasons to celebrate. May God be with you.

  10. Honestly, I do have these thoughts too. Then I remember Psalm 37. While waiting on the Lord, it takes Grace and a lot of perseverance not to fail by the way side.

  11. You can choose your Sin but not the Consequences. STAY STRONG.

  12. My Mantra: Don't do what your heart doesn't want to do. No matter the situation. God won't punish you for opening your legs for a man because of a job, as some people have suggested. My opinion is that after you have shamefully allowed him to touch you with his old, dry, shrunken hands. And you have allowed is aged diseased spit inside your mouth. And his disgusting weak penis inside you. Then what? You get the Job and live happily ever after? Or you get money and all your problems will disappear? No. You will get good Job opportunities in the future without so much as blinking an eye if you are a hard worker. Then you will look back and regret that you allowed HIM to touch you for a stupid custom Job.

    1. Geez... *killing the visuals in my head*

    2. Ewww!!! Ifesinachi the visual you've put into words seems worse than the consequences that may come after. hehehe

      check for music reviews.

  13. Don't sleep with a man for work. You're the one who'll go to work, suffer through traffic and wait to be paid at the end of the month. That's not a fair deal. He should give you the money. Besides, he can't get you the job. He will shine your Congo for free.

  14. It gets hard sometimes, but really trusting and putting all hope in God is the way to go. I've faced this so many times, probably might not be where i am now if i had chosen to go that path but would it be worth it? And how many men would you sleep with for favours bcos as the humans that we are, other needs would come up. In time my dear

  15. Be content. You have a job and some dont. you are not the only one with a low paying job or the only who isnt happy with their pay every month. But then we are all different. Why would you even consider Sleeping with a man for work? absolutely low+disgusting. To even think it, says a whole lot. All the best.


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