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Cheers To The Men!

Good morning people!

It's a lazy morning over here. I was trying to relax and catch up on online gossip. Then I saw a 'men are this, men are that' post and I felt my easy Sunday morning slowly go to ruins. I think it's about time some bloggers and some women in general stop with the male bashing. It's sickening and it in no way helps anyone's course. Even with all the "All men are devils/dogs/bastards/cheats/losers/demons" rants you still love them, marry them, have sex with them, have their kids, act stupid for them, do anything to please them, become a fool for them... So what does that make you? That kind of makes you even less than a devil/dog/bastard/cheat/loser/demon. 

We need to stop this battle of the sexes and focus on the things that matter. We've all been hurt before, we all have our broken hearts and battle scars to prove it but guess what, men get hurt too. Some women do even greater evils than men. Or should we begin the "women will do anything for money" talk? I've said a number of times that if money grows on trees women will date monkeys. (If that generalization annoys you then put yourself in men's shoes). Not all men are cheats or bastards. 

There are good men out there. There are decent, faithful, loving and hardworking men out there. 
And this Sunday morning I raise my glass to all the good men out there. 
I give a toast: 
To the men are do all they can to provide for their women and/or families
To the men who treat their women with love and respect
To the faithful ones who know that they don't have to cheat, just because they can. 
To the men who support their women's dreams
To the men who know that even as she submits, he should love her just as Christ loves the Church, more than himself. 
To the men to go the extra mile to make their women happy. 
To the men who make their women proud to call them their Own. 
And lastly, to the women to raised these great men!

Yes, these men DO exist and I doff my cap to them this morning, especially to the ones in my life. 

There are very bad men, just as there are very bad women. I've talked with men married to verbally, emotionally and physically abusive wives. These men go through hotter hells than some women do. 

       We need to stop with the male-bashing and the battle of the Sexes. Have a blessed day all!


  1. Cheers to all good men and women.
    May their spouses/neighbours have the good reasoning of not taking them for granted.
    Have a blessed day too Thelma.

    1. Lol @ Neighbor? Why neighbor?

    2. :) I used the word here, to represent any other human being.

  2. Thank you for this. The reason more men will continue to be bad is bacause you have already said all of them are bad. There are some very good men, eg my hubby. I thank God for him everyday.

  3. While I am cheering to all the good men out there, I will still like to set one thing straight. - men are more privileged than women and most times it gives them the right to oppress women. It's absolutely normal that there is lots of male bashing go on, as there are lots of gays seeking their rights, and blacks in white countries speaking against racism. The oppressed must speak out. When it comes to physical, emotional abuse the majority of sufferers are women, and the "inflictors" are men.
    This your post is sha one kain.

    1. Being more privileged does not confer a right to oppress anybody and I am of the opinion that this is some of the stuffs we need to corect. They are simply wrong assumptions that complicates our thinking; what is wrong in a woman simply removing herself from the environment where she is being oppressed, rather than screaming "all men are useless" like she never had a father?
      Why do some women complain about a cheating man, why not simply dump him?? I am not a pro in these issues but girls need to be raised properly to first believe in themselves. Seeking to change a cheating or abusive man is one of the factors that often leads to more friction.

    2. It's one kain because for once a woman acknowledges that women aren't always the victims and men are not always predators?

  4. In terms of abuse, there are more abused men than women and this is a fact because most men won't come out and share their experiences with anyone. I stand corrected on this.
    T, I agree with u on this; ladies, I know we men ain't all good but give us a break. Whenever I hear that generalization that all men are dogs, I always shut the proponents up with a very simple question: Have u ever seen a bitch in heat? If y'all wanna make dat kind of generalization for ur own advantage, use a he-goat, not a dog. I know me brodas will have my head for this! Lol!

  5. Thelma, thanks for this post. It is refreshing reading something different today although your blog doesn't do any male bashing (or did I miss the posts?).
    My attitude to all the bashing is somewhat different, is it any different from the bashing of Nigerian police, politicians, etc? We complain too much in that country expecting our challenges to fizzle away after our complaints. The only problem I see is that lots of young women will be destroyed with the BS they are fed about men.
    There are useless and crazy people and they are men and women, we should leave it at that and celebrate those men and women that are working hard, day in day out, to improve their lives, raise great kids and make our society a better place.
    So, I give a toast to Thelma for bringing this up today.

    1. I say AYE! to that! And I raise my glass (campari on the rocks) to all men and fathers (appreciated or not) who handle and tolerate a lot of BS without complain.

    2. Wale it's not this blog. Im sure it's that blog where all the bitter wives in Nigeria go to lament.

  6. Yep,there are good men just like there are bad women too. We shld celebrate those worth celebrating even if the good ones are less than the average percent!

  7. I celebrate my hubby for the better person he has become. He isn't perfect but has improved so much. I'm glad to say his aim (as he said to me while courting) at being the best lover, hubby, father is being achieved. Great work in progress.

    To all the good men and women out there, thumbs up! May you be rewarded accordingly.

    To the young men being raised now as boys, may you become the new change which our generation longs for.

    To the mothers raising them, may God help us all.

    To the girls who'll marry them, may they bless us for raising treasures.

    Lastly, to the good men who live wonderful exemplary lives for these boys to see and become better and great men, please don't change. You are appreciated and you are loved!

    1. Very very aptly said, Enjay! Bravo! T, I still raise my glass to u!

  8. Seeing as how my views on this have been written by wale and the likes, I can only further lay emphasis on wale's point. I think it's a character flaw for a woman to stay put in any kind of abusive relationship with the excuse of societal conventions and religious beliefs. While no man has the right to treat you wrong, U also owe it to yourself to refuse to b treated wrong. I could rant all day on this abuse of a thing but lemme just stop here.
    My cheers goes to Thelma's blog! For being refreshing and free of d madness that goes on in that other blog and it's likes. Some comments on there though! Makes U grateful U'll never get to meet some people in your lifetime. So much hate!!!
    Kudos to TTB! May it remain sane, even as it builds up crawling traffic.

  9. You cudnt have said it better thelma,God bless all the good and sane men out there.
    Cheers dad,you remain the best of the bestest

  10. Hey Thelma,
    I love your blog.always been reading but only commented once before.
    Well done!
    I've got a question to ask: please where's Ruthy?,I only ask cause she seems to have been missing from the comment section for a while.

  11. #clicks glass with you#
    We all have females and males in our family, so when we point and cuss other people out the balance 4 fingers are pointing back to us! That is the IRONY of life!
    It is said that every action, gets a reaction.

  12. I wonder if they don't have brothers and sons.....Look past the anger, they are great men out there,but most importantly find your own man not someone who you desperately manipulated into dating or marrying you, with such relationship, you can only expect thorns. Bia where is Ruth..... Missed her comments sha. Cheers to all the Men on this blog, you guys ROCK and to T, ure a blessing


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Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

One More Post...


He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
LOVE THEM and watching the season film of The Secret Life of
American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
See how you are serious dey read this story....!


A side chick is commonly known as a mistress or a woman that’s romantically involved with a man who is in a committed relationship.  However after doing some reflecting, I realize that’s not the only type of side chick.  I want to discuss “the new side chick”–a woman who decides to stay by a man’s side after he has expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words or actions.  So many women have made this mistake at least once in their lifetime, and unfortunately I’ve done the same thing. I like to think of the new side chick as an appetizer.  You’re there just to satisfy the immediate appetite of the man, but as soon as that mouth-watering entrée comes out to the table, you will get pushed to the side, literally.  Why?  Because that entrée is what he really wanted; he went to the restaurant to order steak, not hot wings.  You were just a placeholder, fling, temporary commitment, or  maybe even just a “good ol time” until what he really wanted was presented to hi…


I'm in an amebo mood tonight. Don't ask me, I honestly don't know why. Also I'd like to share too but I'd do that anonymously in the comment section. Tonight I want to talk about secrets. It's ok, we can all be anonymous. 
Is it true that EVERYBODY has a secret? 
Is there anyone here who doesn't have a secret? I'd really like to know; You're a completely open book and there's not ONE thing about you that you wouldn't mind other people knowing about? Please raise your hands up. 
And for the rest of us, what's something about you that no one knows, or very few people know? Who's got a dark secret here, or a weird one, or a funny one even? I really don't mean to be invasive but I don't want to be the only one sharing, plus I think hearing other people's secrets is quite fun, don't you think?

Let's Be Random Together! (Open Keypad).

Hey guys, a while back blog reader F said something about creating an Open Keypad post, where you can write whatever you want in the comment section. I thought it was a fun idea!
So who is interested? Comment on anything you feel like, ask me or anyone a question, talk about how your day went, your job, your interests, tell us something about you that we don't know, share a testimony with us, rant about anything you feel like, talk about your crush/boo/spouse/relationship/marriage, challenges you're facing, ANYTHING AT ALL! 
I'll only make one request; that we stay civil. 

(F it was you who made this suggestion, right? I'm not too sure and I can't even remember the post the comment was made on). 
BTW please Ejoeccome out come out, wherever you are!

Adventures, Fun, Friendship & Laughter at the TTB Hangout (Lekki Conservation Center).

Nicole to Clare: mummy lets go. I want to climb that ropy thing!

Isn't Clare beautiful?!

Uyi et moi. Clowning. 

Mother & child. 

Scary af! Trish on the ramp. The chica loves the outdoors so much, she was like a kid in a candy store. She and Uyi took this walk twice! More power to them, you can't pay me to do this a second time.

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Question of The Day.

TTB readers doesn't this tweet below remind you of something?
That mail that someone sent me a few weeks back. 
But why on earth should a man sleep with his son's fiancé? But what am I saying, some men even sleep with their daughters...

Oh well, I'm throwing the question to you. What has happened in your life that you never saw coming, you never hesperred it, you never imagined could happen, you never imagined could happen to you? 
It could be good, it could be bad, it could be ugly. Do tell!
And it can be more than one. Let me tell you a few. 
-owning a blog -week long dry fast at Prayer City (I never hesperred it).  -staying in an (emotionally) abusive relationship.
The others require anonymity. LOL. Now over to you.