"Is there something about marriage?"
Can you be less ambiguous?" I asked.
"Its just that I've noticed that men, after they get married, they just become very handsome. They fill out in on the right places. Their appearance is neater. Their shoulders are higher, they somehow now have a new swag, a new confidence... There's just something about men after they get married. What is it about marriage?"
"It's just that I saw *Yele and ....."
Oh. Now I knew what she was talking about. Yele was one of those guys that you'd never give the time of day as a single hot chic. Really? Why would you? After all you're a smoking hot chic, a size 10 with all the right curves and flawless skin that cost more than his then monthly salary to maintain. You couldn't understand the nerve of him to look at you with admiration and hope. Did he have any idea how much it cost to look that good? Please face your front... Look right ahead, look past me. There's nothing to see here, at least, nothing for you to see here.
Yeah, that was the kind of guy that Yele was. For some reason he couldn't stop loving my friend *Chioma. We couldn't comprehend why his eyes were up-up, why he won't just toast someone more his speed, someone that was in his level. It really wasn't that there was anything wrong with him per sé, it's just that... There were other guys a chic like Chioma would consider before him. Many other guys...
He wasn't all bad and if one looked closer, and really squinted, they might have seen some potential. But really who had that kind of time? Why go to the farm and dig out the yam tuber when there was a hot plate of iyan and egusi right in front of you? And that's kind of how it was with Yele. Why take the time, why waste the time trying to decipher that ray of potential you think you saw, then begin to work on him, polish him up and all of that, when there were some suave polished young bachelors yet around all for the taking? Well Chioma became a brick wall where Yele was concerned.
That was some 2 years ago.
Chioma saw Yele and his Mrs a while back at Terra Kulture and she didn't even recognize him till he came over to say hello and introduce her to wifey as "An old acquaintance". Ouch! But that wasn't the part that pained Chioma sef. It was Yele himself that had Chioma smarting. She couldn't stop thinking about their meeting even days after seeing him.
So now she says she cannot believe how he became so mysteriously transformed. He had a confidence that was never there before. The H factor that's synonymous with some Yorubas and his general poor diction were conspicuously absent. His lips were no longer dry and chapped but now full and supple, his skin with its dull pallor was now healthy and shiny. And was that a Patek Phillipe wristwatch? After the Hellos and Goodbye he walked away, hand in hand with wifey and Chioma noticed that his gait was proud and graceful.
"Bia Nwando, is this what marriage does to men?"
Ju ba m. Ask me o!!! As if I've been married before. *RME* But I knew just what she meant. I don't know if that's what marriage does to men but I know that some women can take Boy Alinco and turn him into (their own) Idris Elba.
I saw the comment below on Bella Naija and I sent it to Chioma. Let his love be enough.
"My now husband used to dress poorly back in the days, had a difficulty expressing himself in public and had BO. The good thing was that he was very smart and ambitious and that was enough for me.. The song ‘Let me upgrade you’ is not just a song ladies….let it be your anthem. I fixed his dressing, suggested outfits for him. Now this boy even cares about fashion more than me. Regarding his BO, I buy his deodorant and perfume for him and always tell him how sexy he smells after he puts it on. Now this man uses his perfume every time and can't go a day without his deodorant. THERE IS NOTHING THAT CANNOT BE FIXED. LET HIS LOVE BE ENOUGH."
I guess this is the point I was making in the Little Miss Silly post.
All well and good. But, I won't end without sharing the words of that nagging voice in my head that's crying to be let out; Shrek did not transform into the Prince Charming we'd expected, instead Princess Fiona transformed into an Ogre, likewise not every Boy Alinco will be an Idris Elba.
Seek discernment and foresight. Look carefully, choose wisely.