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Note To Self; Don't Let Introversion Rob You Of Great Opportunities,like it almost did tonight.





As some of you may know; I'm an introvert. I'm a social introvert. I'm an occasionally socially inept social introvert (if that makes any sense). I've berated myself time and time again for the potential opportunities, friends and relationships I'm losing out on everytime I'd rather bury my head under my duvet than go out and actually interact with real people. 

This evening I went back to my 'comfort zone'; the home of *Nkechi and le boo. Unfortunately a few minutes after I got there they said they had to go and see a friend of his somewhere in Victoria Island. I'd met said friend; very prim and proper British-Nigerian whose liveliness sapped the life out of me each time I saw him. He prides himself on being a "skilled conversationalist" and also likes to think he can flow and get along with everyone at any level. His crib is also usually the hub of evening social gatherings; successful people always attract crowd. 


Yet I just couldn't. I'd had a long day and the last thing I wanted to do was to see PEOPLE. Sometimes I just don't like people. People exhaust me, they wear me out and leave me feeling drained. It's not personal though, it's that bane called introversion. Unfortunately I didn't drive (someone dropped me off at Nkechi's) and her boo said he wouldn't drop me off at home till they'd seen this friend of his at VI. I had no choice so I got up and dragged my feet to the car, promising myself and anyone who cared to listen that I would sit in the car and wait for them till they were done. This is typical Nwando-behaviour; I sometimes go to extreme lengths to avoid real human interaction. We got to the house and this guy insisted on locking his car, saying if I didn't want to come in then I didn't have to but he wouldn't leave his car open. Long story short I went in. 

His friend's steward brought us some soft drinks and some bottles of port and I was about to immerse myself so that if I had to converse with this guy it would take the edge off and make me feel less pressured. But then just before I could begin this immersion he started to ask me about work and then we actually started talking about something that got me something I've been wanting for a while. 
      It's basically a job to incorporate a few companies and file annual returns on some other
companies and do some Corporate Affairs Commission runs for him and some of his business associates. The money isn't overwhelming but it's money, and it's one I hadn't expected to get tonight. Also I mentioned dealings with property and real estate and we're meeting later this week to discuss some prospects. I'm so glad because there are properties I've got on my hands at the moment and let's just say that (this evening's conversations/plans) is a step in the right direction.
       Now while I'm not jumping up and down in excitement I'm indeed glad. I'm hopeful and prayerful and also; I'm thankful that Nkechi and Boo did not let my introversion and love for solitary confinement drive me home and make me miss out on these opportunities. Also, besides these present jobs, this guy is someone in whose corner any young lawyer would love to be. 

So my fellow introverts, sometimes we really do miss out on things. We miss out on opportunities, experiences, people, moments, jobs, connections, relationships, laughter, and sometimes; life.... just because we would rather stay tucked away. Trust me I understand more than anyone else how exhausting people can be. I understand that need to recharge after a few moments with other people. I understand how much we love to be by ourselves and how much we accomplish when we're alone. I
understand how much we resent and avoid small talk and awkward silences. Yet the truth is that no one is an island; we do need people in order to live life to its fullest. 

Note to Self; make more effort to live more. 



Goodnight lovers. Better days ahead...

Comments

  1. Good advise. No one would have ever thought in a million years you were an introvert

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thelma is a big introvert oh. Even when you manage to drag her out she will stay in one corner and observe then go home after one hour because everyone "exhausted" her. Lolol.

      Delete
  2. Hmn...glad your friends made you be at the house.
    Hopefully the business talks get to work out.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is so me and it's not like I achieve anything by being alone o but I'll still just want to be alone, God please help me so I don't miss opportunities o..
    L.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This is so me and it's not like I achieve anything by being alone o but I'll still just want to be alone, God please help me so I don't miss opportunities o..
    L.

    ReplyDelete
  5. On the positive side, this lifestyle i believe has kept me out of trouble and i dont want that to change, or just may be thats the excuse i give to myself for being this way, besides i ve tried so hard but i cant help myself, i love my bed and my house more than anywhere else.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I totally feel you Ifunanya.My mantra is,i love my house,i totally love my house, more often than not I tend to weigh any socializing with different measuring rods and I would always vote for staying indoors.I agree with Thelma that introverts need to make a conscious effort to socialize.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ifunanya U are my long lost sister oh. But like T said, I have to repent so as not to lose out on awesome opportunities.
      All this my gragra on social media na phone & tab e end oh. LOL
      Am even an extreme introvert.

      But am beginning to put myself out there & meet new people...
      #MyPledge
      Starting with members of this blog!

      Delete
  7. I am an introvert too people exhaust me, I love my own company. I'll take your advice and put myself out there more.I fully agree with you Thelma no one is an island.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Lol Ruthy.... but i think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, what is meant for u will find its way to u, my colleague got an amazing job just by a retweet on twitter.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Well, what can I say? I am guilty of being an introvert. I dislike awkward silence and easily get exhausted trying to entertain. Hubby had to literally drag me to a wedding on Saturda, sef. So comfortable with my company. I would put an effort though.. BTW, thanks for visiting.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wow. You introverts amaze me, you people are a different specie. Is it safe to say most introverts are the people you find reading blogs because extroverts are too busy socializing outside? Just wondering.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. you may be right hun.. I am an introvert and i don't think it's by choice.. I'm in a new town where I know just one girl.. she's an introvert herself and she's cool with it so no hope. I am job hunting so I HOPE i meet people soon.. I get nervous and I do tend to stutter so that forces me into my shell..a lot which I hate. In a happy world, I would love to have an active social life and even get tired of it lol. I want to meet new people and just get out of my shell. I plan on doing something today..meeting a group for tea so il see where that goes.. I'm just 22, I should be out there socializing and not always on my phone or laptop looking for the next blog to read smh.

      Delete
    2. I don't think so o! I would not describe myself as an introvert in a million years but i am also very adept at self entertainment and i read blogs. Know a lot of extroverts that are the same way. I guess as you get older you find a balance between all the hoolabaloo outside and enjoying ur own company.

      Delete
  11. I'm between being an introvert and an extrovert, my mood just decides where and how I want to be and I blend well wherever I find myself. Good luck on the new opportunity Thelma.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Eniola I am with you on this, I am torn between two world.
    Wish u the best Tee

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now I have a face to your name. Pls bring back your gist.

      Delete
  13. I'm also an introvert..another one for me is "dressing up"..I hate it not cos there's nothing to wear o! I know how many dates,hang out with the girls I've cancelled just 'cos I don't/didn't wanna "dress up" especially when I'm already comfy in my "house dress"..oh well.. Fina

    ReplyDelete
  14. Am definitely an introvert. I love people, though from enough distance that allows me observe and analyse dem. Beyond that, actual interaction tires me out.
    I love, love my room and would sooner not leave it unless sometime vital demands I do.
    Sometimes I get the feeling am losing out on some things, and I keep wanting to live more, but it's still a work in progress.
    Being introverted does have it's advantages, but so does being extroverted. I think I need to find a balance, I hope I actually 'DO' something about it dis time around.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Thelma, thought you were actually describing me, I remember telling you this sometime ago...Its so sad sometimes but when I try to make the effort to come out of my shell, I feel like I'm acting and trying to be who i'm not and like a snail or tortoise, I slowly and carefully withdraw again...sigh

    ReplyDelete

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