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Tell Them Not To Grope You And You Just Might Get Hit!






This particularly reminded me of the number of times my friends have been groped in public places, especially at parties or in a club. And guess the irony guys; just like Mary above, the both times the ladies challenged the guys for groping them they got assaulted. 

When we were still students, we attended this party where some guy groped my friend *Beam's butt and when she turned at started screaming the idiot actually broke a bottle and threatened to stab her with it. 

One Christmas eve two Decembers ago at The Place, my friend *Aisha had her boobs grabbed and squeezed by one inebriated fool. When she challenged him this guy actually SLAPPED her. That night all hell was let loose. Personally I was a bit miffed because besides violating my friend's body, the rascal's action cut short my fun. I'd wanted to party till sunrise but after the whole incident, screaming, shouting, scattering of tables etc we had to leave and it was only 12am or so... Ok, I digress. 
      Now although it may not seem like a big deal to some, the person who wears the shoes knows where it hurts. Aisha still gets apprehensive when she wears something that shows a bit of her décolletage.

On the incident;
Mary revealed that she had to spend nine hours at the hospital receiving treatment following the alleged assault.

She said; “A man in the crowd grabbed my arse. When I told him not to he did it again.

I pushed him away, exercising my right to tell a man to stop touching my body without my permission, so he took a swing at me and punched me in the face.”

Mary said that some of her friends had suggested it might be “best not to do anything at all” when a man assaults you sexually.


.........
Why do some men think it's ok to treat women like animals? Why do they think these women don't have a right to complain when they lash out? 

What I find interesting is the last sentence. Most ladies actually have this mindset, when a man sexually assaults you it's just safer to be mute and pretend nothing happened; causing a stir is more trouble than it's worth... 

I think some men need serious reorientation. 


Photo Source & Clip; bellanaija.com

Comments

  1. Thelma ehhhh,it once happened to me ohh,den dis fone call stands were reigning,had to mk a call cos had no call card n didn't wanna buy cos I had spent a lot on call card dat week,lo n behold,met dis fool where I went to mk d call n he said something LIKE,I LOVE UR ASS N DNT MIND IF I CUD AV U FOR D NITE FOR 2k,can u imagine?funny enuf,I dnr know dis guy from adam,out of anger I told him to go av his mama for dat amt n he slapped ME n trust me,I gat bad temper I pulled d heels I was wearing n used it on his head cos I was coming from work before I branched to mk d call. Dis guy's head was bleeding like a rushing tap,omo his frnds came to rush him to d hospital,paid bills n all dat but to cut d Long story short,till today if dat guy sees me,him dey hide face even though we av moved from dat area. So I feel men like dat shud b tot bitter lesson from time to time n women who cnt handle dem shud involve d right authority.

    ReplyDelete
  2. @ Mabel, good for u, I'd do the same thing. An aboki (mallam) tried to grope my friends breast back when we where in secondary school, me that was very lepacious, if u see as I take my shoe beat d guy,

    This rubbish happens a lot @ yaba market, and I always make it a duty to wear my iron spiked ring whenever I go there, if u touch me, I hit u and u bleed.

    Some men are animals. Clare

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yaba market..(Smh in pity,sadness,etc).
      A day's shopping there can leave u traumatized for weeks!

      Delete
  3. Clare, yes! Yaba market! OMG. Once this guy grabbed my ass and I slapped him on the back. That's how he said he was going to kill me o! All the traders started saying he's very dangerous that I should get on my knees and beg him if I didn't want to die that day. The guy was trying to grab me by the neck. Me I was just screaming like a banshee. To my surprise the guy pulled out his belt, said he won't stop flogging me till he draws blood. Now the sad thing about this situation is that most people will just 'remove face' and live you to dance to the tune alone. I was freaking scared but I didn't let it show. Eventually one of the traders came and knelt down and begged for me. Omo! That was the end of my shopping o! Immediately I got out of the market I started crying. I didn't know how scared I was till I was out of the danger zone. The guy really looked like a very violent rabid dog.
    A lot of that kind of crap used to happen in Yaba market. Dunno if it's still so bad.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Those boys are just so silly. Once I saw a lady grab a guys' d*** in retaliation for grabbing her butt and before anyone could say Jack, he had dealt her dirty slaps after slaps across the face. The girl didn't leave him despite that, it took a lot of begging from pure water, snacks and other hawkers before she let go. Then the silly other Yaba boys were saying that was she the first lady whose butt would be grabbed in Yaba market and they were even making a joke out of the number of boobs and butts that they've caressed.
      Another time I was coming from a wedding and as it is with their usual modes of persuasion to come and buy something, a certain guy kept following me. I told him I was only in transit that I was going to take a bus to Oyingbo. But he kept on following me, before I knew it he was trying to sneak a black camisole into the small carrier bag that had my high heels. I had to start shouting to declare my innocence before jungle justice would take its course on me.

      Delete
    2. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
  4. Hahahahahahah Thelma u av really had a lot of wahala

    ReplyDelete
  5. its still very bad thelma. and its not just the gropings but the derogatory words Also. once an ibo dude said he was squeeze my breast out there in the open. i usually ignore them and give them straight face. if it gets to bad, i shout at them. Im not scared of them

    ReplyDelete
  6. Well it still goes on @ yaba market o, I was der about 2 months ago, but. It's not as bad as it used to be. I detest going there, if not for curtains and bed sheets that I frequently go there to buy.

    That brings me to the question. Pls who can diirect me to a very good place or person dat sells quality bedsheets.

    Thanks. Clare

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can. Mail me and I'll give you his contacts. I'm usually wary of giving referrals in case they disappoint but, I guess you can try him out and decide.

      Delete
  7. Well it still goes on @ yaba market o, I was der about 2 months ago, but. It's not as bad as it used to be. I detest going there, if not for curtains and bed sheets that I frequently go there to buy.

    That brings me to the question. Pls who can diirect me to a very good place or person dat sells quality bedsheets.

    Thanks. Clare

    ReplyDelete
  8. Violence is never the answer. He grabbed your butt and you pushed him? The push has almost made you guys even. A bus conductor once pushed me very rashly for no reason. I got bruised but I didn't say anything because the outcome of talking or acting might result in my doing something I will regret. My silence jarred him. When I got off the bus, he started to beg. I didn't reply. I didn't give him the satisfaction of my forgiveness. That's enough revenge for me. To cut the long story short: Violence is never the answer for male or female.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree with you but some people have sharp reflexes. The shock of someone publicly groping your privates (no pun intended) doesn't always give much room for rational reasoning. That said, not everyone is so sensitive to silence and straight faces. The conductor must have been a conscientious person.

      Delete
    2. I agree with you too.

      Delete
  9. Omo, I don't care where it happens or what the fool was thinking, I will fight back. If He wants to kill me, go ahead.
    I'll prefer to end up in the hospital than do nothing at all like I'm a mannequin. Then let's see what happens after my family hears of it, they will grab his brains till it bleeds. Foolish men!

    ReplyDelete
  10. This story made me angry, what is wrong with some guys? Most men do not respect women, I have noticed if you are in town alone some guys will make derogatory remarks or try to touch you but if you are in the company of a man no one will dare do such things. This issue of groping happens everywhere even in the banking halls someone will brush their hands against your bum or hips and then pretend it was an accident. If a man touches me I will confront him I don't care what he does or how big he is may be I won't fight him but I won't let him go away without a piece of my mind.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Mine was really funny. I was abt to cross over to the next street in Challenge área somewhere in Ibadan. And dis mad man from no where groped my ass. In a public place oooo, i was so embrassed to be annoyed Lol. Throughout dat week d incident kept playing in my head.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Mehn............I will (love to) confront any guy who grabs my butt or breasts in public without my consent! What insolence?
    But u see, u have to apply wisdom my people, those Yaba guys r on another level.
    The first and only time I went to Yaba marekt, I went with my sis-in-law and yunga sis. My sis-in-law had someone whom sheusually buys stuff from, so as soon as we got there, we went to meet the guy. After showing us what he had, he decided to take us to another person's shop since we wanted more stuff that he didn't have. Na so we dey follow d guy dey go o, other guys just dey draw us from left, right n center, we were complaining that we were already going with someone, and the guy turned to tell the other guys to leave us that we were with him, Omo, na so them attack the guy o, saying all sorts of rubbish like "na u go marry them"?, "them be virgins?", etc. bifo we know wetin dey happen, a fight ensued and next thing he was bleeding, Na so me n my sisters turn back n headed in the opposite direction out, when some people started shouting "see the girls wey cause the fight", we pick race OUT of the market. Twas a horrible experience and I swore to never go back there.
    So, if them grab ur butt or boobs in Yaba, unless u have a solid game, I suggest you keep moving, infact, run away from there to avoid further grabbing, or being beaten up. Those guys are animals.

    But seriously, guys who grab butts n boobs in public need to be beaten up seriously, by women too. So they learn to never mess with women.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I was at Balogun and Yaba market yesterday and the story is different now oh! As much as it's a bad thing, Ebola has curbed the groping business. They now talk to you from afar or walk beside you making sure no part of your body makes contact with theirs. Only one beside UBA house touched my elbow saying; fine babe and I replied; in this Ebola time, you no de fear to touch person abi? The guy sharply cleaned his hand on his shorts. As I walked away, in my mind I thought, if I had Ebola, cleaning your hand on your shorts won't save you. Anuofia...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LMAO! Ebola is d new attainment of wisdom.

      Delete

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