On Sunday I accompanied my friend to House on The Rock and it turned out to be pretty amazing. I haven't been to HOTR since I left Enugu. Service was fantastic and while I maintain my Catholicism I really enjoyed the sermon.
Today I woke up and knew without a doubt that I would go for midweek service at HOTR in the evening, the Pastor was going to conclude his Sunday message and I'm not one to miss a sermon on Vision and Dimensions. I went alone and this time around I chose to sit downstairs with the rest of the congregation and not isolate myself on the terrace as my friend does at Sunday services (and I was therefore forced to do on Sunday). I mean, if you go and sit alone in one corner, how are you going to meet people? You could be passing up on so many opportunities, great people and potential relationships (professional, financial, emotional and otherwise) without even knowing it! So I decided to sit downstairs right in the thick of things and I'm sure glad I did.
Right beside me was the most gorgeous mixed race lady I've ever met and she was a delight to sit with and just as we were really beginning to hit it off, this young man comes and sits at my other side. His heady Tom Ford cologne filled my nostrils and I instantly fell in want. Service was awesome, it was interactive and exciting and with all the high-fiving and 'turn to your neighbour and say...' going on I wasn't surprised when Mr Tom Ford said in a whisper; "Is it ok if we get to talk after service?".
Of course it was; you're not only (seemingly) in the spirit, you also know your cologne, your footwear, your wristwatch, your diction and you also know how not to scream like a frightened horse when the pastor says "Make a loud noise for Jesus", so that wins you about 5 minutes of my time.
Service ended and he walked me to my car, we chatted for a bit and exchanged numbers. I left and headed for The Place to get some dinner, it was past 9pm and I just wanted to get something light.
My new friend calls and asks what I'm up to. Getting dinner, says I. "You went to buy food? Why? Can't you cook?", I tried to explain that it was too late to cook and I'd had a long day. He empathized with me and said he understood, then his voice suddenly took a very serious tone; "But Nwando can you cook? Seriously?". Immediately I remembered an article I read on men and how they meet someone they might like and begin to see if she checks off all or most of their boxes, I could hear the eagerness in my new friend's voice as he waited impatiently to check that box. I toyed with a few ideas;
*tell him NO and see his reaction,
*lie; raise your selling points and say "Oh yes, cooking is second nature to me, I've been cooking from the womb, in fact maggi just made me an ambassador as a result of my great culinary skills",
*eventually I settled for the truth "of course I cook. I don't have a problem with cooking, it's no great hobby of mine but I must eat so I must cook".
I could hear him struggle to figure out if he should check that box or leave it empty, I think I heard him check the box; her response could have been better but it was good enough, I heard him think.
Before the call ended I was already getting pissed off. Who does he think he is, and why is he asking if I can cook? What is wrong with men? Next thing I know he'll be asking me to cook for him. He better not try it. Nansense!
But then after I'd calmed down I realized that I'd been checking off my own boxes too from the moment he asked if we could talk afterwards. I'd checked the cologne box, the good hygiene/personal grooming box, the good vocabulary/diction box, (and then after we got talking) the job/career box, the good sense of humour box and even boxes I didn't know I was checking. So hey, who was I to get upset?
So guys, what happens next when someone checks off most of your boxes?
What happens when someone checks off all or most of your boxes and you don't check any of theirs?
Most importantly; HOW MANY of your boxes does your significant other check off, ALL, MOST, FEW, NONE?
Have a good night beautiful people!