Good morning guys. I think I'm in LOVE!
Seriously! I cannot remember the last time I woke up feeling this way, lighthearted, hopeful, expectant but most especially, at peace. Last night I made some confessions to God and I know this can ONLY be Him. Isn't He AMAZEBALLS!
I'd like to thank the blog reader that recommended me to her bank to be a writer on the bank's blog site, I received the email this morning and of course I accepted the request. Will get on that soon.
Ok, let's get started. I saw these tweets by Audu Maikori, Chocolate City CEO with the hashtag #itwontwek and I went through them thinking yadayadayada, till I got to the last and my breath suddenly caught in my chest.
In the last month or two I've had conversations with a number of single ladies all around my age and I've noticed they've all said one thing in common; "I'm afraid of getting married because I'm not sure I can handle the trying times/rain/tough times/difficult times/the storm when it comes".
We are all old enough to know that marriage is no picnic and each one comes with it's specific brand of challenges, plus it seems each marriage and married couple always encounter a storm at one point or the other in marriage; this could be in form of bad finances/bankruptcy, unemployment, chronic illness, adultery, childlessness, infidelity, poor communication, domestic abuse, 'baby mama drama', loss of love/attraction, distance or what have you.
These single ladies have all admitted that they do not know that they can stand the storm. Some have said, "I can face difficulty alone, but with a husband? I'm just not sure", one repeatedly says "I don't know if I can withstand it if my husband loses all his money. Will I then be expected to go out and hustle? I cannot be the one to hustle", and another "I'm not sure I can face certain challenges in marriage; if my husband loses his money after we get married and I have to be the breadwinner I'm sure I will lose all the respect I have for him, I will stop loving him and I may have an affair with someone else". A few have mentioned that they are very fine being single because they dread the storm, that stormy season that marriages occasionally encounter, those very difficult, trying periods.
Each time I've shrugged them off and tried to convince them that they're stronger than they think and bla bla bla, but this morning I saw Audu's tweet and for some reason I shuddered, I think it was the "it WILL come", the certainty.
My question is this guys; what does it take to weather the storm in marriages? Is love enough? What happens when your spouse doesn't stand and fight with you through that trying period? What weapons are available to married couples to enable them weather the storm in marriages? How do you express to your spouse that you still love them even in those moments you hate and resent them? Is it possible for marriages to face much smaller storms or no storms at all?
How do you think a couple pass through the storms of marriage and emerge intact?
Please married people in the house enlighten us.