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Craziest Sh** Ever!





I can't believe I've never asked you guys this! Ok, so last night I met new friends and you know how it is the night before a traditional marriage; the bride's friends, siblings and relatives are all in the house and everyone chills together and has a great laugh and awesome conversation. OR if there's someone in the pack that you happen to have instant chemistry with and it's mutual, y'all might excuse yourselves are have your own "two aside", like Yours Truly and him last night *clears throat*. Ok, so before I lose the plot here..., no topic was off limits and you know one of the most interesting things you can share with people; the craziest thing you've ever done. 


TTB readers I honestly cannot believe I've never asked you this. Guys, you really need to tell me; what's the absolute CRAZIEST thing you've ever done in life, school, at work, with your boo, on a vacation, in bed, at a party, whatever! Please I'm itching to hear, go anonymous if you must, just don't hold anything back. LOL. 


The first craziest thing I did guys, was to have a "relationship" with a guy of 21yrs when I was only 9yrs old. Ok, we never met physically, one day I was randomly dialing numbers on the NITEL land line and that was how I met Korede, who turned out to be a 21yr old LASU student. . I mean I think I saw him once when I gave him an address close to my house and told him to come at 6pm, told him I would be waiting at the junction. That evening when my neighbours and I went out to play our usual ten-ten I looked out for him, two guys came and loitered around for about twenty minutes and left (no mobile phones then). I'm not sure which was Korede and till date I don't know how I managed to pull that prank off for months. Hell, I can't understand how he didn't know he was talking to a child. I said my name was Kelly, my sisters were Kerry, Cherry, Berry and Merry and we were black Americans. I also remember him telling me things a 9yr old had no business hearing *covers face*. 


And then there was also this time before that, I must have been about 8 and well, I forged a letter to one of my neighbours claiming to be my dad, complaining about the late hours she kept and the numerous male visitors that frequented her abode... I'm not sure how that ended. 

And the craziest things I've done as an adult... I CANNOT post those here, at least not have you know that I Thelma, Nwando did those... Haha!


And now, your turn!

Comments

  1. Sex with my boyfriends ex. The best day of my life.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Replies
    1. Hahahaha...

      Delete
    2. I'm not gay, I just tried it once n I loved it. Getting fucked by somebody my boyfriend fucked was a big turn on.

      Delete
  3. Sex in a bus on a night journey.

    ReplyDelete
  4. sex with a full on her period

    ReplyDelete
  5. sex with a girl on her period

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yuck!
      Nyama!
      Ewelele chai in Mannie's voice




      *cant watch*

      Delete
    2. There's nothing wrong or yucky about sex on your period, just do it the right was and buy omo before u start. Lol

      Delete
  6. Leaving a girl in the night on the road without transport fare to go home, I know cos before she came, she vehemently told me she didn't have a dime for her To and Fro movement.
    I'm not proud of what I did and I still regret every moment of dat cos I really didn't knw how everything actually turn out that way
    I apologized to her and I don't think we wud ever see again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Broz plz find a way of reaching out 2 her and apologize @ least. Facebook search or somethg! That's an ish she might never 4gv u 4 d rest of her life!



      *hmmmm, I just dey observe*

      Delete
  7. I dated this Muslim, I knew I couldn't get married to him, he kept begging me to, saying his folks wer on his neck, wanted to arrange someone bla bla, anyways, I broke up with him. And then, I saw his in law some months after, and she told me he was getting married bit he dint tel me. Instead, he stopped taking my calls. Like a month or two after his wedding, he called me, came to my place, and wanted to have sex, I guess he dint know I knew he was married, I let him give me head, I screamed my lungs out, and then when he wanted me to give him head, told him I dint want to, and told him I dint want sex. He said I'd just called him a fool and left upset

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And u left him high and dry like dt?

      Eya, poor guy!

      Delete
  8. sex with my ex when his room mate was in the room! oyibo did not leave oo..

    Always been curious about lesbianism, so while I was an exchange student to europe i slept with a girl and I loved it! oh lord.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now let d lesbo and orgy sex tales begin!




      *hmmmm, I just dey observe*

      Delete
  9. Oga Easah,pls yarn ur own,quit stalking other people's exposé...lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahaha, I might hv done dt anonymously. It's hi time u went anon and spill! Biko spill ur's o coz i can't wait 2 read them. There is a special way I detect ur comments whn u R on anonymous mode

      *tongue out*

      Delete
    2. Yimu and tongue out!!!! Lol

      Delete
    3. Pot calling kettle black. Sasha bone u too only stalk people's comments and say c'est la vie, u never talk ur own n ur even worse than easah

      Delete
    4. Thelma,ur people have started calling me names (pot ati kettle). If I start my own,nobody shld call my name o...hmm

      Delete
    5. I dunno Sasha... The Anon seems to be an observant person. But how dare HE/SHE call you an inanimate object? Im'ma trace the IP address and make them pay! That's the least I can do for a sister.

      Delete
    6. Hahaha...ok o. Sha trace the He/She!

      Delete
  10. that a man stop demanding for sex doesn't mean he's getting it elsewhere. the older a man becomes and more responsibilities makes sex less important, it shouldn't be at the detriment of the wife though. And this doesn't apply to pastor's alone

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hmmm, I've done some crazy shit sha.

    Sex with 5 guys in one day, it was crazy but kinda fun. Especially the last 3.
    Guy 1; my real boo then
    Guy 2: a crush from my teenage days
    Guy 3: a highly placed Govt official, it was a quickie in his office (collect 200k in dollars back then)
    Guy 4: another oga in house of rep: collected 200k cash it was a quickie in his office
    Guy 3: my frnds hang out buddy at a joint, had a quickie on his red sports cars outside, it was crazy, got over 200k from his. I got over 600k dat day, but my boo I went to see gave me just 5k o.

    Crazy tin, but I hvnt done such again. I only fantasize these days. Mama mia

    ReplyDelete
  12. Lol these comments, The last one thou.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Nawao must it always be about sex??? Very ridiculous

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree, very ludicrous but guess what? Sex is the order of the day!

      Delete
  14. Uhmnnn... when I was 7yrs Old... I wrote a letter to my dad and it went something like this: "Daddy, you're a very stupid daddy. I hate you. You hate me too much. I'm leaving your house for you. Goodbye daddy. Don't look for me..." And then I dropped it(the letter) on the coffee table, packed a few things, and left the house. I was going to run away. But our house help ran after me. She didn't let me go. she locked the door and hid the keys. Begged me to wait for my mum to get back before I run.(lol) I pleaded with her! Pppt! She didn't even answer me. Eventually, I ate, slept and forgot all about the letter. My mum came back that day, saw the letter and hid it in her wardrobe. Months later! I don't know what popsy was looking for in her wardrobe, he found the letter and read it. He was livid. He called a family meeting o. I kuku didn't know the implication of all those things I wrote. (lol) he insisted that I leave the house, or my mom should follow me if she wants or he'll leave the house for us. My mom had to call her brother, my grandpa and grandma to beg him to please rethink the decision. Till tomorrow thelma... when my dad gets really angry with me, he refers to the incident. Some would wonder why I wrote that kind of letter at that age to my dad... he didn't sexually abuse me or anything like that... but well... that's a story for another day.
    So yeah! That's the craziest thing iv ever done lol... and I was 7!!!!

    I'd have told you another wan but momsy wud read this! Lmaoo! So i'll just say that wan as anonymous so she won't know! Lol! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OMG. He must have been so hurt for him to remember it till today, and yes, asking you to leave... That's confusing. I guess one would really need to see the whole picture to know just what to say.

      Delete
    2. Thnks K for breaking the sex norm, shit!...Nelly

      Delete
  15. If your dad still insisted that at the age of 7 or 8 you should still leave the house, then I'm not surprised why you wrote the letter in the first place.

    No matter how bad the content of the letter was, asking u to leave doesn't make sense. He must be a very hard man.

    Na wa o.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Kabuoy, I understand why you wrote that letter. For an 8 years girl to write that, your dad must have been one HARD man. I can still sense he hasn't changed till now based on some of your comments about him. It's your mom I praise. Please send my kisses to her. Kai! Your mom is one over patient woman to have lived with your dad all these years.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lmaoo! She'll see your kisses... she's a ttbv. Lol! Yeah momsy ni suuuru!(momsy is very patient) Chai! and she's been trying to teach me some.. lol! I hope I eventually learn and listen sha.

      Meanwhile, yeah popsy was really hard on us.. still is... it kinda paid off sha.. cuz we turned out "right" in the end.. lol. and yeah! He is not the easiest person to live with! At all!!! Hehe... I still hail momsy.. 24 years and counting! lol...

      But he is fun!!!! More fun than momsy sef. And he is really funny. There's no dull moment with him and he's a really wonderful father. We have very deep conversations and he has taught me a lot of things about life that has guided and is still guiding me till today. I look at some of my mates and some of the terrible mistakes they made while growing up and I'm like... that could have been me if I didn't have a father like him. and for that i'm eternally grateful. He's wise and very vast. Lol. *he still cannot understand why I'm not keen on knowing what goes on in the world and all that stuff* hehe!
      It took us a while to understand some things about him and why he acts the way he does. But as we grew older, we began to understand better and see him in a different light.
      I was quite stubborn and set in my ways. My sister understood quickly and that saved her from lots of wahala... but me ke? lai lai! I will argue! Say my own part. Voice my own view! Lol! And that got me into serious trouble. But well... i'm wiser now. we still have issues but it's way better than before.
      But then... when I was younger, you could have told me my popsy is not my popsy and I'd have gladly believed you. lol. I really wanted to believe it. I just didn't understand. Lol

      And yeah thelma! It really hurt him o! Like really really. But I didn't understand nah! That was how I felt then. I was just 7. But as far as he was concerned, I meant every word and it was to deep.(for a 7yr old) so yeah... he has forgiven me but i'm sure he has not forgotten! lol.

      Another epistle... o ga o! *no vex* **big smile**

      Delete
  17. As per trying to leave, my brother did it. I was the only one he told. He packed a few stuffs and told me he was leaving. He said he was tired of mom n dad. I was confused; I just looked on as he opened the gate. In my mind, I was like: is this brother okay? Mom came home from work, asked after him and I told her everything. I can't remember if mom was bothered or not. When it dawned on him he had no where to go, he went to play with his friends and came home in the evening.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hahahahahahaa @ went to play with his friends and came home in the evening. She probably went to pray that God should touch his heart! Lol!
      But seriously, in hindsight, I realize that there was really no place to go... lol!

      Delete
  18. God bless u Kabuoy for not toking dirty!.... UJ

    ReplyDelete
  19. When i was 6-7 i slapped the girl that looked after us in the house, she was my mum's friend's daughter and God that girl was a witch, she used to hit us every opportunity she got, when my mum leaves the house she got us to do the chores. Every sweet and biscuits we got, she took them and hid them, then she gave it back when she heard the car.
    So back to it, I was jejely minding my business think about what a six year old thinks about, and she came and started drama hitting me for no reason, and I flipped , I can clearly remember my self say " If you touch me once more you would not like what happens next" and she did it again, I got up stood on the bed and gave her such a hot slap my mum heard in her room, she scolded but it felt so good. I still don't know what came over me that day.
    Next one is just new I got my nipple pierced, was walking randomly and it came to mind so I went to a tattoo parlour and got it done right there.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I dated this very arrogant guy that thinks he's too hot for me, so one time I came to visit and this dude got me very angry. He left me all alone in the house to attend friend's wedding without food and bathing water. He went on to send a text informing me he wasn't coming home that day so I took a deep breath,went outside to ask the gate man to get me some water. I took a bath,gathered my things,packed his new laptop and locked him out of his own house with a different padlock. I swear I would have carried his LCD TV if I had my car with me. I went to crash in a hotel and left the next day(I paid 15k for the room by 11:25pm) so I sent him a text and threatened to report his yahoo ass to efcc because I had all the evidence in the laptop. He begged,paid in some cash into my account in exchange for the laptop. Guess what? I took the money,deleted all the files in his laptop and sold it for 45k. You can't mess with Ocheze,nobody does lol.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Got a new sim card and called my ex for him to save the number,
    Ex-hello?
    Bloggitup-(answering in my sexiest voice) hey wasup
    Ex- whoz this?
    Bloggitup- its Mariam. don't you have my number?(pranking him).
    Ex-(excitedly)Oh,mariam longest time,how are you,are you in town?sorrry my phone got stolen and I lost all my contacts(lies).
    Bloggitup- oh sorry about that and yes am in town,came in for a seminar in Unilag but going to see a movie now at leisure mall surulere.
    Ex-oh dats cool,how long are you gonna be there i don't mind coming to pick you up so we can hangout and i give you a nice treat.
    Bloggitup-now thats cool.movie ends 8:45pm,you can come pick me up then
    Ex- I have really missed you baby.
    Bloggitup-(heartbroken) me too dear.but come with your pocket loaded o.no stories.
    Ex- trust me now,anything for you,can't wait to see you later darling.
    Bloggitup-(RME) me too.
    Sharply by 8pm, I dressed up and went to wait for him at leisure mall,by 8;30 Ex was already driving into the mall then i went and intentionally bumped into him.
    Ex- (shocked) what are you doing here?
    Bloggitup-(acting surprised and happy) came to see a movie,aaah u closed early today o,thank God sef u will take me home.
    Ex-(eyes distracted) home ke? i have a small meeting with a friend of mine and we are supposed to meet here.
    Bloggitup- ehn i will wait, oya come and buy me cold stone icecream so i will be cooling off while u are having your meeting.(i put my hand in the pocket of my jumpsuit and press the dial button, his phone rings and he gets very uncomfortable)
    Bloggittup- your business partner is calling you,oya gimmie your wallet lemme go and buy icecream joor(playfully) he didnt pick the call but he was looking round and searching for Mariam.lol
    Ex-do you know what? I have some money in the car lemme give you for ice cream and a cab home.
    Bloggitup-nooooooooo, you will go and drop me
    EX- I cant baby,i have a meeting and i will be long(very impatient) what do you want?
    Bloggitup-ok gimmie your ATM lemme withdraw the money myself
    Ex-take and withdraw only 5k o,i'll collect it when we see.bye baby.(sending me away quickly).
    He gave me the ATM card and password to his GTBank Account(something he would not do on a normal day) and i walked away,I had not gotten to the gate when my phone started ringing.i didnt pick cos he could still see me so i quickly went to a corner and received it
    Bloggitup: hello dear,where are you? am at the gallery pls come up.
    Ex-ok
    i went to the nearest ATM,checked his account balance.He had 92k in that account,I withdrew 20k in 4 batches and 2k single.immediately my other line rang...
    Bloggitup- hello baby
    Ex-(angry) are u okay? I said you should withdraw only 5k and i got an alert for 92k.
    Bloggitup-sorry motherfucker!!! but I had to give myself and MARIAM a treat.guess ure up there looking for her.say me hi to MARIAM when you find her.and don't EVER come to my house.mtshewwww. That was the end of our relationship,he was too ashamed to face me.he just went and blocked his ATM card.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow wow wow! What a read!




      *lips sealed and watching*

      Delete
    2. HAHAHHAHAHHAHA........thats some really crazy shit!

      Delete
  22. Mine was during my service year..I kinda fell for a guy in camp who liked me too but there was one girl who really liked him too and was ready to have him which I didn't even have a problem with cos it was just a crush..anyway,after our orientation camp,we both lodged into a hotel(he paid). Next day,in the evening,he said he wanted to go out,next I knew,he came back with the girl,I heard a knock,peeped through the "peep hole" on the door(is that what it's called?),saw them both but refused opening the door,he kept banging,I just quietly increased the volume of the tv set for him to know I was inside. When he left,I took his things and kept them by the door,he came back knocking,calling my name but didn't answer him..still wondering why he brought her to the hotel though. Well,that's mine. Might not be crazy but was crazy to me. Lol

    ReplyDelete

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