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Dear Thelma... (To Tell Or Not To Tell?)

Good morning Thelma. One of my friends confessed to me that she slept with a mutual friend's husband some weeks back. I'm closer to the mutual friend than I am to her and I spend a lot of time her family because we live in the same estate. I know she confided in me out of guilt and because she needed someone to talk to but I'm finding it more and more difficult to keep quiet. I started giving my friend's husband attitude and she noticed. It wasn't intentional o! I couldn't help myself so I decided to stop going to their house but we still talk. Should I tell her or not? Won't she be angry if she finds out I knew all along and said nothing? I hate being in the middle of this kind of drama walahi. BVs pls what do u think I should do?


  1. Keep quiet! If u must, warn the husband but don't tell ur friend. You may destroy a home and you guys friendship.

  2. Biko don't tell,if u tell,you are destroying a home. Just mind your biz n tell d friend not to try such again.

  3. You don't have to tell. You're not under any obligation to do so plus your friend confided in u so don't break the trust she has in u

  4. Aside ur friend thinking you are trustworthy and u want to break it, you will destroy your other friends marriage. please and please DO NOT tell your friend.mind your business except u want your name called several times in family meetings plus u will no longer be invited to their home when they eventually settle the issues.MEANING YOU WILL LOOSE BOTH FRIENDS.chikena!!!

  5. Really @ all the comments, I would like my friend to tell me oh because the threat is real.

  6. See ehn, Ayam Sorry, but I WILL TELL.
    I'll even tell my friend A that I'm telling Friend B because I'm closer to friend B & if the tables turn, i'll expect her to tell me too.
    Ladies sha. Keep ur legs closed when u see a wedding ring esp, if u can't then keep ur mouth shut. Don't put someone under unnecessary guilt & pressure!
    Thank U God for my type of close friends... the 2 of them na correct people.

  7. Not telling your friend would break her heart more when she eventually finds out cos she will and that will make you an accessory. She needs to know. The other friend that slept with your friend's husband is a miserable bitch. Oh my head is spinning.


  8. I don't think you should tell her , if it happened to me I wouldn't want to be told. Some other people will want to be told, you know your friend better do you think she will like to know? If you think so then go ahead and tell her but she is like me, then please save her the heart ache n do not. You might want to warn the husband tho' it might keep him on his toes if he knows you know, n probably won't do it again. That's if he is not a serial cheater, but if he is one who sleeps around , you might consider telling your friend as it might save her from sti n the likes. Whew! Did I even make sense? Trace

  9. Some friends wld wanna be told,some wldnt wanna hear it from u. So,know the type of person she is and go accordingly.

  10. If u wanna save face, send her an anonymous mail, text or whatever. It's a very dicey issue, it could go both ways for you.

    Your friend needs to know, however you don't need to do the telling urself.

    It's going to take a lot of nerve to face her and tell her. So brace up for the outcome. Clare

  11. If u wanna save face, send her an anonymous mail, text or whatever. It's a very dicey issue, it could go both ways for you.

    Your friend needs to know, however you don't need to do the telling urself.

    It's going to take a lot of nerve to face her and tell her. So brace up for the outcome. Clare

    1. I consider this option safer

  12. The only reason you should be bothered about saying anything to your close friend is if you knew your mutual friend was doing this behind your close friend's back. Mutual friend confided in you because she needs to feel a sense of freedom from what she's done. Sorry you've been burdened with knowing this but that's something you just have to live with. Even if your close friend finds out and gets to know that you knew, just make it plain that it's not in your place to damage a serene relationship. Mutual friend knows what she did was wrong. That's good enough. Let everyone move on like it never happened. Shikena


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