Skip to main content

The Things I Want. (To Be Or Not To Be Specific?)

Hello people! Some nights ago I went to see my friend at home and just as I was leaving I ran into her mum. Just like mothers do, she began to ask me about my love life, if I'm seeing anyone and if we're getting married soon. I replied in the negative. On hearing my response, she began to reassure me that all is well and that all I have to do is remain consistent in prayers. She then said to me that when I'm praying I should adopt three things, the third thing she said was Specificity. 

She said I should be specific in my prayers, I should tell God exactly what I want. In her words; "If you're going to buy a car you don't just walk into the dealership and say 'I want a car', you tell them the exact model you want, the brand, the year and all the specifications. Likewise when you're praying to God for a husband you tell him; tall, lanky, dark skinned, good job, God-fearing, etc. Tell God  EVERYTHING you want in your desired husband, don't leave a detail out. Also do this when you're praying for other things, not just your husband". 

Now I found this particularly interesting because it's something that has nagged me for a while. She wouldn't be the first person telling me about specificity in prayers. I've heard other people, both religious and non-religious say it. But then again I've also heard the religious and non-religious say that when you pray you shouldn't give God orders, don't send him on errands, He already knows what plans he has for you, He knows what is best for you and that is what He will give you. Therefore telling him what to do, if not in line with His own plans might be to your detriment. 

To be honest with you guys the latter holds more weight with me, it makes more sense to me. But after hearing my friend's mother speak, I was reminded of the times I've heard sermons and lectures on Specificity and now I'm beginning to wonder. 

I said some prayers at midnight this morning and I was going to adopt that Specificity method but I felt a tad uncomfortable. 

So I'm asking you people; What is the right way to pray/to ask God for something. Do you for instance tell God "I need a life partner/job/relationship" and leave it to Him to do His WILL, or do you tell Him "I need a life partner/job/relationship" and then tell him specifically every detail of this thing you desire and exactly how, where and when you want it?

What do you do, and so far what has worked for you? Please share. 


  1. I understand both sides of the argument but I will say I will rather go for Gods will in my life knowing and understanding that he knows whats best for me.
    Although most times, he does drop some things in your heart in other for you to work with.
    There is no one size fits it all approach with God, if you don't feel comfy in your spirit with the specificity prayers please by all means just pour out your heart to God.

    1. very well said, we tend to be very superficial these days however asking that his will be done in your life is the best gift you can do for yourself.Its better to be more interested in being the best "you" you could be and you will definitely attract same, water always finds its own level IMO.

  2. I feel its better to pray to God with details. For instance, if one's desire is for a husband, including details about character, career et al might not be unscriptural. Remember in Romans 12:2, he desires/encourages us that our minds be transformed to things of His will. Hence, with longer time in our walk with Him, our prayers should be in line with His desires for us and that can be attained. I sometimes marvel how prophets of old often spoke 'big' words without inquiring from God and God made those words come to pass. So much power has been committed to His children and that power can accomplish much. I'd end on this note, that no matter the specificities of what we desire, we should always seek to defer to God's will cuz He meets our needs not necessarily our wants.

    Don't worry if our prayer 'details' aren't right, he'd always give us that which is right and beats our imagination. It's in His nature and thus he can't go against his uniqueness. Luke 11:13, Ephesians 3:20

    1. I wouldn't have written it any better.

  3. I asked God for the kind of Man I want o, even up to the kind of surname I wanted- yes, I asked for aa cute name.

    I got 80 percent of what I assked for. 80 percent because there were some selfish things o wannted, however, God streamlined it and gave me the most important things on my list.

    Thelms, don't feel a tad guilty, when God wanted hiis temple built, he. Asked for woods from lebanon, stones from the very best countries, he gave details the exact way he wanted them.

    Ask. And Ye shall receive

  4. I asked God for the kind of Man I want o, even up to the kind of surname I wanted- yes, I asked for aa cute name.

    I got 80 percent of what I assked for. 80 percent because there were some selfish things o wannted, however, God streamlined it and gave me the most important things on my list.

    Thelms, don't feel a tad guilty, when God wanted hiis temple built, he. Asked for woods from lebanon, stones from the very best countries, he gave details the exact way he wanted them.

    Ask. And Ye shall receive

  5. What I do is tell God exactly what I want then say but if it not your will then let your own will be done.

  6. I've listened to both sides of the coin.
    Both are scriptural. If U just want to ask for something, maybe a Car & U specify. Green Honda Accord, 2010 model. Or U just say God pls give me a car...
    As Long as that desire of Urs is in harmony with his will & U the person asking is living in harmony with his will, He'll give U what U deserve, which is the Best.
    Not specifying shows U trust God too much for the Best.
    Specifying shows U have a strong desire about ur request.
    Both is acceptable according to the Scriptures!

    But For Me, I NEVER go into detail cos I don't trust myself. LOL
    His Blessings has NO pain so I leave it to him!

    1. I'm with Ruthy all the way with her every word, don't need to say much

    2. Hmmmm his blessing has no pain... word to hold on to.

    3. Oya Uyi & Subomi this is my email:

      Let's start from there!

  7. "A child cannot ask his father for bread and he will be given fish"
    Ask God for the kind of man you want but God will give you the best.
    See, prayer is communication with God. When you pray for something, you tell Him specifics of what you want. But if those specs that you have asked for are not His will for you, He will give you the very best that he has for you.
    I've come to realize that some Christian couples who have shared their testimony most at times says that, their spouses were not exactly what they wanted but they turned out to be the best they could ever wish for.
    My point here is just that, when you ask God for something,be specific and also ask that His will be done.

  8. Well said Ruthy, especially when it comes to man matter, i dont go all specific cuz i can be really superficial so i leave it all to God cuz He knows what i need, He maketh rich and addeth no sorrow to it so its all good. But strangely enough when it comes to job, career and Other stuff, i go all out to be specific and start naming names and that has worked for me. I think i have accepted that i'm just really messed up when it comes to relationship choices....

  9. I just say 'Lord, please grant me my heart desire as far as it is your will for my life, but if it's not your will, Father let your will be done'. That's how I say my own o. God knows our heart's desire, and I know he wants the best for us.

  10. Our specifics may not be God's will so I majorly ask for things I want but say it should be of his will.even if I get specific,I say if it's not of his will then it shouldn't happen.God knows what's best for us,it could really be our specifics but the timing may just be different.

  11. Both ways can work,but wen d matter at hand is really important I talk to God lyk I will talk to a friend,I try to explain my reasons and then say God at d end let your will be done ...n so far this method has worked for me, I mean prayer is communication tell God what you want,there's a way you will say it that its won't sound like you are giving him orders

  12. As long as its God you are praying to, doesn't matter how u ask for what you want.. just ask.
    I always specify what I want in a way that does not sound like giving orders and I get it.

  13. God already knows our heart desires but He wants us to confess it, proclaim it, say it. The Bible admonishes us to ask so what does ask entail? It is true that sometimes we don't exactly know what we want and we can be very superficial in the things we ask for but usually I first pray for God's leading to make the right utterances and request. Over the years I have had to tweak what I want in my husband but certain values remain very constant and I mention them to God. I am so sure that those values will be evident in him when I meet him. I believe in being specific, because I have already asked his guidance on what I should pray for.

  14. Both are scriptural. Ask and ye shall receive. So i told God exactly what i wanted in a man. (someone that will listen to me, fear God, comfortable in life, love me beyond words and most importantly someone that won't be carried away by my body of want to sleep with me before marriage) Guess what God brought exactly what i wanted and when everything was manifesting i just knew that he has done it. T be specific in your request and trust me God will grant you the desires of your heart,


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Turia Pitt Suffered 65% Burns But Loved Conquered All...

Amazing Story Shared by Dr. Ben Carson on Facebook, i thought it is inspiring and i decided to share;

The Australian ex-model Turia Pitt suffered burns to 65 per cent of her body, lost her fingers and thumb on her right hand and spent five months in hospital after she was trapped by a grassfire in a 100 kilometre ultra-marathon in the Kimberley. Her boyfriend decided to quit his job to care for her recovery. 
Days ago, in an interview for CNN they asked him:
"Did you at any moment think about leaving her and hiring someone to take care of her and moving on with your life?"

His reply touched the world:

"I married her soul, her character, and she's the only woman that will continue to fulfill my dreams."

This made me very reflective. I just wonder; if the person you love today encounters an incident or accident that transforms who they are physically, it could be amputation, it could be paralysis, it could be severe burns that scald their flesh beyond recognition, w…


Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

One More Post...


He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
LOVE THEM and watching the season film of The Secret Life of
American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
See how you are serious dey read this story....!


A side chick is commonly known as a mistress or a woman that’s romantically involved with a man who is in a committed relationship.  However after doing some reflecting, I realize that’s not the only type of side chick.  I want to discuss “the new side chick”–a woman who decides to stay by a man’s side after he has expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words or actions.  So many women have made this mistake at least once in their lifetime, and unfortunately I’ve done the same thing. I like to think of the new side chick as an appetizer.  You’re there just to satisfy the immediate appetite of the man, but as soon as that mouth-watering entrée comes out to the table, you will get pushed to the side, literally.  Why?  Because that entrée is what he really wanted; he went to the restaurant to order steak, not hot wings.  You were just a placeholder, fling, temporary commitment, or  maybe even just a “good ol time” until what he really wanted was presented to hi…


I'm in an amebo mood tonight. Don't ask me, I honestly don't know why. Also I'd like to share too but I'd do that anonymously in the comment section. Tonight I want to talk about secrets. It's ok, we can all be anonymous. 
Is it true that EVERYBODY has a secret? 
Is there anyone here who doesn't have a secret? I'd really like to know; You're a completely open book and there's not ONE thing about you that you wouldn't mind other people knowing about? Please raise your hands up. 
And for the rest of us, what's something about you that no one knows, or very few people know? Who's got a dark secret here, or a weird one, or a funny one even? I really don't mean to be invasive but I don't want to be the only one sharing, plus I think hearing other people's secrets is quite fun, don't you think?

Let's Be Random Together! (Open Keypad).

Hey guys, a while back blog reader F said something about creating an Open Keypad post, where you can write whatever you want in the comment section. I thought it was a fun idea!
So who is interested? Comment on anything you feel like, ask me or anyone a question, talk about how your day went, your job, your interests, tell us something about you that we don't know, share a testimony with us, rant about anything you feel like, talk about your crush/boo/spouse/relationship/marriage, challenges you're facing, ANYTHING AT ALL! 
I'll only make one request; that we stay civil. 

(F it was you who made this suggestion, right? I'm not too sure and I can't even remember the post the comment was made on). 
BTW please Ejoeccome out come out, wherever you are!

Closed Chapter...

Hello everyone, yesterday a friend said to me, Thelma I love your blog, I've told so many people about your blog, I think you're a very good writer but I feel there's something you're not doing right"

This friend was the first person who won our beauty of the day contest back then in 2014. Then we had met just once through a mutual friend. I mentioned the blog to her and she became an instant reader. I wouldn't have exactly called her a friend then but yesterday as we sat down waiting for our Uber to come get us from Wal-Mart, she's definitely my friend and I knew she was coming from a good place when she said she had much higher expectations of my blog.

Me too.

But you see, in the last year or so, maybe even longer than that, I haven't felt much joy in blogging. It began to feel more and more of a laborious chore, one which I hardly reaped any fruits from.

I really love writing, I love sharing my life and my experiences with others and I've enjoy…

Adventures, Fun, Friendship & Laughter at the TTB Hangout (Lekki Conservation Center).

Nicole to Clare: mummy lets go. I want to climb that ropy thing!

Isn't Clare beautiful?!

Uyi et moi. Clowning. 

Mother & child. 

Scary af! Trish on the ramp. The chica loves the outdoors so much, she was like a kid in a candy store. She and Uyi took this walk twice! More power to them, you can't pay me to do this a second time.

Uyi & Tiwa