So you've seen me, right? Maybe you haven't so I'll describe myself to you. I'm hella SEXY (yes ke!) and I'm also BIG. Azzzzzzin, and then this Christmas season isn't even helping matters at all. Yeah I know all the right things to do, I even joined this gym that's practically on my street about a month ago. On the day I registered I paid in full, but I never went back after that. It's been a month and I never went back! My bestie is a caterer and a baker and in PH she experimented on me, she baked this mad ass hybrid extrachocolatey red velvet cake and another one with almonds and pecans, my favourite! And then she wrapped up both cakes and sent me on my merry way to Lagos. I really should stop, I know. Yet he keeps saying you're such a sexy woman, I just love your body, I love you just the way you are.
Mind you he's a very vain person (I use vain deliberately because there's 'health-conscious', and then there's 'vain', he is both); gym every morning; seven days a week! Protein shakes, fresh vegetables, juice fasts and all... Yet he holds my love-handles and says "You're a very sexy woman, I love you just the way you are" Roighhhht.
And I believed him, silly, gullible, gluttonous me, I actually believed him. Until I realized that on a few occasions I've caught him get lost staring at not so big women, staring in admiration and approval... I decided to give myself brain o!!!
I need to look for that gym receipt, thankfully I told them that my time wouldn't start running till the day I start my work out. And then I'll hit the vege-market, do a detox and lose this friggin flabby fat!
And while we're on the topic of men saying one thing and wanting another, check out this comment I saw on Bella Naija one day.
LOL. Men why do y'all do this?
Has your boo ever told you (he'll like you) to do/act/dress one way and you later found out that he likes the exact opposite?