He had been playfully poking at her sides and laughing, anyone watching them would have seen that she wasn't amused and must have thought her a fastidious bi*ch. Then he whispered into her ear and what followed was most unexpected and shocking. She raised her hand to give him a slap that would have been vicious and extremely painful had her hand not stopped mid-swing. What a terrible girl, how uncouth, how thoughtless, how ungrateful to have such an amazing man in her life and treat him this way!
In the minutes that followed I saw the way they all looked at me, their expressions varied from shock to disbelief, surprise to disapproval, sympathy for him to disdain for me. In that minute everyone around hated me. *Helen came and whispered to me, these words I remember like it just happened this morning. "You don't disrespect your man like that in public, no matter what. You just do not disrespect your man like that in public". And one by one they all walked away from me, he was the first to leave. The girls were shocked; how can she have such a perfect man, a fantastic relationship and be this ungrateful? If she doesn't want she should pass him on biko.
And that's the problem with wanting what someone else has; you fail to realize that things are hardly ever as they seem to be.
I don't want to make this post about me so I won't go into details of that relationship but all I can say is that I'm surprised that the most I did was almost slap him in the presence of his friends and mine. It's a wonder I didn't put rat poison in his coffee or something equally fatal.
Everyone would have sworn that our relationship was perfect, I can't remember how many times people would tell me how lucky I was to be in that relationship. I remember the day my friend met him for the first time, she sent me a text saying "you're the luckiest bitch in the world!". Who could I tell that I was the most miserable "bi*tch" in the world and that that relationship was ruining me, my self-esteem and my happiness? But people wouldn't understand because when he was outside he spoke about me to anyone and everyone who cared to listen, everywhere he went he spread 'the Gospel of Nwando'; the best thing to happen besides Google. Meanwhile this guy hated me.
It's for this reason that when the Pastor mounts the pulpit and begins to talk about his wife very effusively with those colourful words, and everyone begins to scream and shout in a frenzy, all the single ladies in the house jump up from their seats because their legs were shaking in excitement and they couldn't sit still anymore, everyone begins to tap into the awesomeness of Pastor's marriage, my friend & blog reader begins to vibrate; Kai, I want to marry, I want this kind of husband, this kind of marriage Oh Lord... And I just sit there with one big *YIMU* on my face... It's because I've learnt that abusers are the biggest cheerleaders of their spouses in public.
No, I'm not calling the pastor or anyone an abuser, neither am I saying that everyone who openly expresses love and admiration for their spouse is an abuser... I've just seen too much to not "tap" or "key" into anyone's blessings unless I live under the same roof with them, and even then...
Isn't it funny... Of course Chris Brown and Karrauche aren't the model couple but who woulda thunk it; threesomes, secret trips to Toronto, dates with Drake (who probably also shagged his Ex; Rihanna)... All y'all using other couples as "Relationship Goals" wave your hands in the air. LOL.
You never know what goes down in some relationships/marriages/homes when you're watching from the outside. All you see is the beautiful package, and then you begin to "tap into" the gift when all that's underneath the beautiful shinny wrapping paper is one big ugly lump of dog poop.