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What Do You Bring To The Table?

Some weeks ago I was having drinks with a friend one night when she said to me "I don't know what I have to offer a man besides my living form" this she said with a sweeping gesture across her body. It was the day I did the "you want him to wait, but are you worth it?" post. 

Overtime we here people talking about potential partners and asking what they bring to the table. I remember when I was talking to my friend Matty a few years back and we were discussing this friend of mind who was very hot, very sexy eye candy. All the men wanted her and she had some kind of Kim Kardashian status. I remember Matty asking me about her and her personality and I remember him say "I really don't care how pretty a woman is, what I care about is what she brings to the table. What value does she add to my life? What value does she add to our relationship? I just cannot marry a woman who does nothing for me, and I don't mean financially". I wish I'd asked Matty what exactly he meant but I was too consumed with asking myself and trying to answer the question; what do I bring to the table?

"I've thought about it over and over again and I can't seem of think of anything", my friend continued. "I really don't think I have anything to offer any man besides this my living form... I don't think I do". Oh, the way she kept saying "my living form" and sweeping her hands over her body made LOL. 

It was absurd because this person in question is a fantastic person and I was surprised that she couldn't see it, so I listed to her some great qualities about her that any person would be glad to have; "first off you're a very intelligent person, you're witty, you're a great conversationalist and your brain is constantly at work. I don't think any man would like a boring partner, there'll never be a dull moment when he's with you. You're also a very good person, kind and patient; you'll listen to him when he has problems, because you're patient and intelligent he won't only depend on you for attention, he will also rely on you for ideas and answers. Besides this you're a good Christian; you'll pray for not only yourself but for him as well. You're empathetic so you'll see his problems as yours and treat them with the same urgency, both physically and spiritually. AND you don't mind cooking, I don't know of a Nigerian man who doesn't appreciate good home made meals."

When I was done talking I could see her take a step back and look within herself again. She did have something to offer after all!

This evening I'm asking if you've ever asked yourself that question; what do I bring to the table? It's imperative that you bring something to the table at work and in your circle, but tonight I'm particular about your relationships. 

Have you ever wondered about it? What do you offer or have to offer your partner besides your body (ladies) or your money (gentlemen)? What value do you add? What value do you give? What do you bring to the table?

Please let us know. 

...And because so many people aren't too clear on what the question "what do you bring to the table?" means, and I'm not too sure I've done a great job at explaining it clearly, I'm asking anyone who can to please explain the concept. Thank you. 

Anonymous Rider I'm terribly sorry for your loss. You're in my prayers my darling. May the good Lord heal you completely, make you whole and lay his blessings upon your life. Amen. 


  1. I think by now we all should accept the fact that Man's Money exchanges for Womans's Body. Right? Right??

    But... We are not talking about that now, are we?

  2. Thanks girl. Didn't know u wld make this a post but I'm glad u see these things in me.

  3. Hmmmmmmmm,I once asked myself these question and I got just few answers, asides from my body,I think I could pass for a prayer warrior when praying for someone ,am a good cook,am.a good listener and I could think of a way out of his problems better than mine and a good manager when it comes to finances. That's all I know I can offer him. But I don't try to impress a man though,I show u whom I am,its now left for u to stay or leave.

  4. What I can Offer is being the Best Wife & Mother that I possibly can.
    Adhering to the admonitions of God's word the bible in handling both roles!

  5. The truth is that most babes feel offering a man their body is sufficient in a relationship/marriage but wise peeps won't settle with anyone who has nothing to offer.
    And same thing goes for the guys. I once dated a guy who said he is not financially buoyant n all he can offer me is his love!! Even during the relationship I discovered we were not on the same page in life n he wasn't really adding much value to me (not financially but with daily activities).
    What am I to use d love for in this day n age?

    A Bili

  6. My mind and heart of gold. All else fades. And I darn well say my mind because even for me it gets a bit much. My husband says I need a sensor, but I generally express about 20% of what I think. Lol

    1. I dont know why but i believe u ve a heart of Gold. I like u a lot *shines teeth*

  7. Marriage is recommended for partners who share a common way of life. Knowing d kinda person I am, once u hv most of d qualities I need in a woman, u would be able 2 bring smthg 2 d table, and I would as well. Shikenah

  8. When you bring nothing to the table, you're the meal. So you darn well bring something. *Ermm e fit no join but na wetin i wan talk be that*

  9. Mydear, E join finish. You've really hit it with the right analogy #BullsEye

  10. I am very supportive, loving, hardworking, intelligent, God fearing(by grace), good looking, playful, d list is no matter the size of the 'table' it wont be scanty or empty by the grace of God.....#JoyDaNuGirl

  11. Thanks Thelma, God Bless you!
    Support is key in every partnership, So ill be giving my Support 10%

  12. I've often said it: any idiot can have sex; even a mad woman can bring forth a child. Meaning? There should be more to a marriage than sex and child bearing. A couple should be able to add real value to each other.



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