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Showing posts from June, 2014

Celibacy Kills!

Last night I went to visit a male friend of mine. We're platonic friends and he happens to be romantically involved with a close friend of mine. We chatted about this and that and then as he usually does he broached the topic of me being single. "Nwando we have to find you a man, you need to have sex" he said.  I explained for the umpteenth time (he and his girlfriend always ridicule my decision to keep to myself) that I'm not looking to 'get laid'. 
"Oh please don't be stupid. That's why your mood is always all over the place. You need to have sex. Everybody needs to have sex. It's just not normal, you're killing yourself! How did you even arrive at this silly decision? You don't want to have sex... Hmmmph! Please stop being stupid". 

Toke Makinwa's Shout Out To Hubby Just Makes Me Want To Love...

.......... Weird mushy feelings are just not right for Mondays but who can help it after seeing this wife's beautiful message to her boo. I want to love and be loved too!!!!! *sobs*. 
Lol @ #liveinlover though. 

Still On The TTRWT Winner.

I apologise if I'm not able to post. All weekend ETISALAT network has been horrible and still is, it took me over 3 hours to finally put this post up. I'm trying to get my wifi connections sorted but I'm not sure when that would be. I read all your comments and the same thoughts passed through my mind before I arrived at my decision so bear in mind it wasn't one I made lightly. 
Readers had expressed concern to me before yesterday. (Phransie) not everyone is on social network, I for one rarely ever tweet, Facebook and I'm presently not on BBM. So it's not fair to assume that everyone is. Also I understand how you may think that going on social network increased my blog traffic but I feel the need to point out that it increased the page view for that post alone and none else (yes, I checked), no other post had an increase in page views beyond the usual besides that story, so it's also not accurate to say that that singular act increased my traffic/readers. An…

TTRWT Winner and Things...

Good morning guys! I was MIA yesterday and through most of the weekend generally. My dad turned 70 and it was awesome. When I think about it i think about when I was much younger and I'd see an obituary or hear that someone was recently deceased then I'd ask how old they are and when I hear 70 I go oh well, they were old, they tried. But when your own parent gets to 70 you suddenly realize how young 70 is. Yes o! 70 is very young and daddy still has many years ahead of him. I'm sure he wasn't and isn't the perfect husband but he is the perfect father and he's going to talk me through child bearing and motherhood so Dear Lord I need him around for many more years to come. Amen.  .............. TTRWT I think should finally wind down and we should look for the next great idea! Now I'm going to have to ask for your understanding, I'm not making this decision arbitrarily but also based on the opinion and under advisement of other blog readers; initially I …

Sisi Yemmie and Bobo Yomi's Beautiful Pre-Wedding Photos

OMG! I never get tired of loving love and these pictures are a perfect way to end my night. 

Sisi Yemmie (of sisiyemmie.com) and Bobo Yomi are the first winners of the My Big Nigerian Wedding Competition.The prize package for the competition that had ten other couples contesting was N15M to cover everthing that has to do with their wedding. Sisi and Bobo arrived the lucky winners of the competition some months back and recently had their pre-wedding photos taken at Elegushi Beach in Lagos. The couple would be wedding in July next month. 

The Other Reason One Is Single That No One Ever Talks About...

Tonight I listened to Aunt Landa on Inspiration fm, my Lord she's simply fantastic! She asked singles to call/text/tweet and say why they think members of the opposite sex are still single, and if you're single, why do you think you're still single. 
After listening to a myriad of comments one thought struck my mind and it's one that's hardly ever talked about. I realize that this topic may be somewhat taboo but hey, I'm going to talk about it anyways.

Tonto Dike/Pokolee Releases Sugar Rush. (My Thoughts)

I don't really keep abreast with Nigerian music, or music in general these days as there's hardly anytime but when I put up the post of Egor Effiok calling Dbanj arrogant and agreeing with her on Dbanj's watery music HERE someone made the following comments and they made me very eager to hear Pokolee's Sugar Rush. 

"THELMA, WHO ARE YOU. UGLY BITCH. HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT KING DBANJ IS ARROGANT.JUST A SNIPPET OF SUGA RUSH BY TONTO DIKE. YOU PEOPLE WANTS TO DIE.FUCK YOU WITH INTERVIEW. BITCH"

Tonto Dike vs Ini Edo (My Ratings For Both Celebrities)

Last week I did ratings for Omotola Jalade Ekeinde and Kate Henshaw Here and the week before that I did the same for Nse Ikpe Etim and Genevieve Nnaji Here .This week I present to you Ini Edo vs Tonto Dike!
Here goes...

Musings On Confidence, Limitations and Love.

I've been in my own space for a while now, to be honest I kind of lost interest in almost everything but then this morning while I went through the usual gossip blogs I saw a mail on Laila's blog sent in by one of her readers as I read through the mail my fingers immediately began to itch and I just needed to write.

Ndi Igbo, Is This What A Typical Traditional Bride Price List LooksLike?

So I just saw this list on Myne Whitman's blog Romancemeetslife  and showed my colleagues and of 
course an argument ensued. Three of us ladies are from Anambra (hot chics. Lol) and we beg to differ 
but the other people at the office seem to agree with the list. A few say this is a typical Owerri/Imo 
state Bride Price list, others say this is actually what the typical Bride Price list of the Igbos look 
like generally, as did the person who originally shared this. 



See the list below..

Do Men Have Higher IQs Than Women?

This week a research assistant at Michigan State University made a visualization of a recent survey from the Educational Testing Service that reported the average IQ of college Majors based on the tests (they’ve) administered. The interesting thing happened when these findings were charted not only with IQ by major, but also how female dominated that major is.

The results don't make women look great. 

Tonight Was The Biggest Anti-Climax In History!

*Forget 6 packs and 6 figures, the brain is what's sexiest in an individual.*



Hey guys! So I just got home. I'd decided not to talk about what I've been getting up to; dates, men, outings etc for some time but I just have to share this. Nothing serious except my night was a total anticlimax. You know how it is when you meet someone who you've kind of known or seen around for sometime and you've had fantasies and expectations, ... Well that's what happened with this 'man'. Long story short, after several weeks making both suggestive and awkward eye contact we actually got to talk, finally and today we went out for the first time. 
I should have seen the red flags when he asked if we could go clubbing. Clubbing. Two grown people. On a Thursday! But hey, I disregarded it. I said that was out of the question, it would be our first date and as such I thought we should go to somewhere we could talk. My mistake.

The Thoughtless Miss Sunshine (Midday Rant Anybody?)

I know some things in life are truly beautiful and often times we just must talk about these bursts of joy with other people, but it would do some others a whole world of good if you thought about it before yakking on. Miss Sunshine is very close to me, she gave me her phone to read a chat she had with someone and another chat to see an argument she'd had with her sister. And then I read her chat with a friend and my heart kind of broke. 

The Praying Partner 2 (TTRWT)- By Oyinlola Sobowale

The Preying Praying Partner
“Okay maybe it’s a bit of that…the never having time but there is so much more and he is only a Choir Minister for chrissakes!” Kate harrumphed “Can you do away with the expletives young lady?! If we want to have a decent conversation, carry on like an adult and note this will be the last time I’ll caution you!” “I’m sorry mom. Truth is we were never happy”. Kate said with a smirk. “Far from it…all right maybe I’m exaggerating,” she pressed on with hands flailing in the air. “We were only happy for about s-six months beyond which it was just a façade”. “I know I’ve never said a word to you and you’ll probably crucify me when you hear what I’m about to tell you. Please take your seat”. “You remember the version of the story I told you about Raphael being born without a silver spoon?” Dr Sophie: “Yes I do and you said you both met in your second year at the university. You got attracted to him for his brains and charm” Kate: “Yes,” she smiled at the memory. That muc…

Toke Makinwa's Vlog: Tasty Vagina (have you tried this?)

Good morning people. Does it feel weird seeing the word VAGINA first thing in the morning? It feels weird to me but if I don't post now I may not be able to once my day gets started, and I do want to hear from you all.


Now to the matter, Toke says that in the middle of a girly gossip (you know how those go, nothing is off limits when girls get together) she found out about an interesting way to keep the vagina smelling and tasting really sweet, and that's to drinks lots of cranberry juice and eat loads of pineapples, ergo, pineberry! I think more ladies need to know this because that's the top complaint men seem to have about women when it comes to sex. See the Turn Offs post and you'll know just what I mean.

I used to think washing up well with warm water does the trick but apparently there's more that can be done. Have you tried this? Does it work? Did 'he' notice any difference? Did he begin to spend a little more time down there and do so with renewed …

Here's How My Day Went... (Competition at the office, in the gym,everywhere!)

Hey world!
It's been a really long day for me. 
After I put up the post in the morning I went for my interview and it was..... quite interesting. So let me just put it this way, I saw the résumés of some of my contenders and I was pretty impressed intimidated. Three out of four of the applicants made 1st class in their first degrees, same in Law School, most of them have written and PUBLISHED law books, most publish regularly in law journals, one guy's résumé particularly made my heart skip a beat, this person was called to the Bar same time as I was and he's already handled matters in the Supreme Court, he listed some really interesting cases he's been a part of, between multinational companies, federal government, foreign companies... He's also been involved in arbitration and mediation for some really big companies, both here and abroad. And yes he made a first class too. One other chic had this résumé that read like fiction and she's also involved in biome…

"He Is Very Arrogant" Egor Efiok Blasts Dbanj (And I Completely AgreeWith Her)

Publicist Egor Efiok doesn't think much of  D'banj latest musical efforts, or his signing of Nollywood star Tonto Dikeh, into his 'Lee' family. Speaking about D'banj earlier in the week, she allegedly said: "I think Tonto is okay on her own, so this isn't about her. I have disliked D'banj since he stabbed his true friend, Don Jazzy, in the back. He's also very arrogant, while Don Jazzy on the other hand, is extremely humble." 

Several Guys Let Us In On Their Biggest Turn Offs In Bed.

James, 30 Ask “is it in yet?”
Craig, 29 If he comes too soon, you need to be patient. Don’t laugh or get frustrated.
Pete, 25 I was having a one-time hookup with a girl and as we were about to have sex she said “make love to me.” I was so taken aback and turned off that I didn’t enjoy the sex at all.
Larry, 41 If she’s not clean down there.
Nick, 30 Don’t feel insecure about your body.
Kurt, 26 I only have two turnoffs: a girl that likes it too rough (when I didn’t want to slap a girl in the face she accused me of being gay) and when a girl wants to kiss me after oral–that freaks me out!
Daniel, 27 The one thing a woman should never do in bed is get in bed too soon. Once a guy gets sex out of you you’re no longer fun and they move on.

My 25 Best Feelings In The World!

This is a random list of some of my best feelings in the world, just because...
1. When I make someone up and they look in the mirror just after I'm done and say "Wow!"
2. When I just get a life altering idea during a brainstorming session that solves one of the firm's present biggest problems. 
3. That minute when I realize I'm falling in love with someone who's falling in love with me. 
4. When I hear a song and I realize I've just found my new best song, and I know it's going to be on replay for the next few weeks. 
5. When I have nothing to do but sit and talk with Osayi and Ginika in those no holds barred moments; those friends you tell every and anything and get absolutely no judgement. 

Still More Kidnaps In The North, This Time It's Even Worse.

According to NTAnetwork About sixty girls between the ages of 3-12 years have been abducted by insurgents in Kummabza village of Damboa local government area of Borno State. Reports from the area indicates that the insurgents also killed about thirty people and destroyed property worth millions of naira during an attack on the community, residents of the village are taking refuge in Lassa and Gulak in Adamawa State. They appealed to the authorities to provide them with shelter and relief materials to reduce their sufferings. Further updates to be provided as soon as we have them.
......... Dear Lord 3-12 year olds! Where does one even begin?

That Afternoon's Call... (People Do Talk).

A while back I got a call that went like this;
Her: Did you go for Tayo's wedding?

Me: Nope

Her: Have you seen the wedding pictures?

Me: No, why, are they on Facebook? What's up?

Her: I don't think so o! Hmmm, if you see her husband....

Me: Haaaa!!! He's hot?

Her: Hot ke? Kai. Tayo no try o!

The REAL Lekki Wives (Wisdom In Keep Up With The Joneses?)

A few months back I attended a show that was organized by my nephew's school. The school is in Lekki phase 1 so naturally most of the kids are residents. Although I'm very involved in my nephew's lives I'd never attended one of the school programs. On that day however my sister had a training at work so I had to go and take him for the show. I won't lie I couldn't care less about what was going on, was only interested in my nephew's performance but even if I was interested in everything something else would have stolen my attention. The mothers. The real Lekki Wives, not those questionable characters on the show Lekki Wives. Speaking of the show; Lekki Wives I must first make some comparisons. Unlike the women on the show, the real Lekki Wives are Go Getters, not Gold Diggers. They are freaking independent women who mostly married well but don't need their husbands' money, they are independent, career driven, overly ambitious and very successful.

....The Best Feeling Yet!

Hey guys, I'm in heaven!

The Good Friend. (Short Story)

Although the caller ID showed 'Private Number' Sarah knew those sounds, they were the all too familiar sounds of a frightened person. She heard the sobs, the clatters of her teeth, she could almost see her shudder and her body wracked with pain and tears. She could see a thick film of sweat across her forehead...
"Nyema, talk to me please. What happened? What happened?"
"I, I, Sarah I..."
"You what Nyema, please talk" Sarah said sounding scared and distressed all at once. This wouldn't be the first time Nyema would make such a call to her.  
"Sarah please come over. Please. I I need you now. Please" Nyema said, struggling to speak
"I'll be there in ten minutes. Just stay calm, ten minutes ok?". 
Sarah quickly pulled on a maxi dress and grabbed her car keys. What had happened this time? What had Samuel done to her friend this time around, causing her to sound so frightened, panicked and fear stricken? There was no time to thin…

Do Men Really Think Like This?

Hey guys ! So we just saw this on Linda Ikeji's blog and it turned into a huge argument. 
Popular consensus is that most men do think like this. 
You would have thought a man would marry the third woman who easily calls to mind the Proverbs 31 woman but how many men really want that? Sincerely? I've seen men leave Proverbs 31 women for bimbos and bubble heads. 
I've been similar to the second woman on a few occasions but I can tell you that, errr, it's not always wise to be so giving. I wouldn't say more. 
I've noticed that men worship women like the first one but they rarely ever marry them. 
So I'm tempted to agree that this story might have just hit the nail on the head. 
So... Yes, what's the moral of this story? (Besides the fact that men are moved by what they see)

Omotola Jalade Ekeinde vs Kate Henshaw (My Ratings For Both Celebrities)

Last week I did my ratings for Genevieve Nnaji vs Nse Ikpe Etim Here , this week I bring you these two damsels.

Thursday Night Journal. (I know one day one day, one day e go beta...)

Yes I'm razz like that...in case you didn't know. 



Last week Friday I called V, (I've told you guys about V before in the post Here ,but in that post I used the name *David) I guess I just really needed to talk and seeing as it was late Friday night everyone I knew was either at home with their SOs or about to hit the club. On Friday nights V usually has drinks with his 'mates' at Piccolo Mondo before going to the club or heading back home, but that didn't deter me, wherever V was he would excuse himself and answer the call, provided it was me calling. That night however I'd seriously hoped he'd be home because I really needed to talk to him. I called and he answered after the second ring but before I could say anything he said "I can't talk now Wando, I'm on another call with my girlfriend". "What?" I asked him, certain I had heard him wrong. "I'm on a call with my girlfriend, I'll call you tomorrow".

On Coming Of Age (TTRWT)- By Chimezie Ogenna Nwodo

Tomorrow I will turn 25. That goes to say that I have lived a ‘quarter’ of my life. Life, no matter how fair it has been to me so far, is turbulent still. Its nuances sway me, like a stray plastic afloat a river. A lot of things, over the last 25 years have taken place unexpectedly, that they found a way to deplete the joy and happiness one readily finds in life. Yet I have a lot to be thankful for. Therefore I thank my Chi- that splendid guardian that has walked with me right from conception; who consoled my mother through the pains of ‘child-birth’ and blotted her heart with the exhilarating joy of child-delivery. My Chi whom it was that watched over me on my infant bed lest I roll off and was with me as I grew older; saving me from every trouble- especially when I wantonly created the problems myself. I thank my Chi for being patient with me through the stormy times of adolescent stupidity…. My Chi who shared my sorrows and joys and always gave me hope of a better tomorrow; who gav…

The Preying Partner (TTRWT)- By Oyinlola Sobowale

Oyinlola


The Preying Praying Partner Voice filled the air In the wake of the night it could be heard It was hers again, a sudden pierce through the quietness Three days in a row, home turned hollow A loud scream. An intense screech A loud shout off a hardened mind Not of a woman in prayer but the ranting of one in despair, wanting revenge. She jumped around on the bed, stepping on him as she vented.
“Stooooooop…stop this minute!” he begged crouching on one knee, his left hand on her hips, as he tried desperately to pull her closer to him.

Updates..

Hey Guys! So I just dropped by to say  *I've received a number of mails for MATCHMAKE MOMENTS but very few from the guys so I'm going to ask for your assistance because we can never have too many people involved in this. If you're  active on social network then please help me put the word out (for those who are single and searching, both male and female) and share the link, if you do so on twitter please cc me @letssplay. The link below
http://www.thelmathinks.blogspot.com/p/ma.html
*Also I've got a backlog of TTRWT posts so that's all I'll post today. (I think)
*Where is Ziggylucious??? (I know she's busy with school and all but I miss her around here)
*Charsy I mistook "dis honest" for "dishonest" in your comment in the last post and I'm truly sorry about that. I wasn't in the best of mind frames yesterday but that's no excuse. 
*Ruthylicious in your last TTRWT post you sent in your picture and I completely forgot to includ…

What Do You Do When Love Takes You To The Last Place You Want ToBe? *Pensive*

Literally, what do you do? His father just called an hour ago and it went something like this.  Me: Hello, good evening sir.  Him: daughter in law how are you? Me: *chuckles*. Fine sir.  Him: You don't want to come and see your people abi? Me: *chuckles* Him: why haven't you come? You have been dilly dallying. Or has someone engaged you in Lagos? Me: no sir, nobody has engaged me (lol) Him: so what is the problem, we want to marry you? Why are you delaying?

While I'm Waiting (TTWRT)- sent in by Favour Folashade Ajayi

Trust you've had a most wonderful day thus far.Actually, this poem was written by a friend of mine (ISAAC MOYINOLUWA), I do have his permission to send to you though.



While I’m waiting...
Not the most suitable or intriguing period of my life 
This is a phase I question the relevance of my creation

Wait, I'm Supposed To Lower My Standards Because Of My Size?

Please I didn't get the memo. The bigger the size, the lower the expectation? At least that's what my friend *Folu thinks. I've told you guys about Folu before, the one I went to the 'Rich Kids' party with where my friend Beam was well and truly wasted Here ? Well, so yes the party was filled with shidren of the wealthy. Now I also know I told you guys several months ago of the son of some very wealthy man I dated in the past. The guy in question is blue blooded, Lagos/Ikoyi old money and all, I told you about some of the travails I faced dating a member of the upper class (I did a post on that long ago but I can't even remember what it's called so I wouldn't be able to include the link). Yeah well, he was at that party. I was telling Folu about my relationship with him; how we broke up, how he came back for a reconciliation but I was done with it all and told him so. Folu's response surprised me. "Was it that time you were slim, or as you com…

"I Love You But... I Love Sex Too".

*Bidemi called me this morning because she rightly thought I would be able to relate to what she's going through. Bidemi has been celibate for about three years now, has been in and out of brief relationships, because really how many men are willing to date you without any sexual satisfaction. The problem however is that things can get really lonely but for the most part, you just sit, grin and bear it.

Been In a Zone....

The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything I need. He lets me rest in fields of green grass and leads me to quiet pools of fresh water.  He gives me new strength.  He guides me in the right paths,  as he has promised.  Even if I go through the deepest darkness, I will not be afraid, Lord,  for you are with me.  Your shepherd's rod and staff protect me.  You prepare a banquet for me,  where all my enemies can see me; you welcome me as an honored guest  and fill my cup to the brim.  I know that your goodness and love will be with me all my life;  and your house will be my home as long as I live.  (Psalm 23:1-6 GNT)


........Just because sometimes I don't know what else to do, I have no one else to turn to. I have nothing to numb the feeling, being in a zone, should be over by now, no? Well it isn't and I have to keep reminding myself; The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything I need.... I'm retreating into my inner corner, where I've been all day. Repeating God's promises he m…

What Love Is (TTRWT) - By Osieme Joy

“Hi, he said” How are you?
“Am fine thank you, I replied”.
“You married now? He asked
“Not yet", I said.
"Anyone in the picture?" He asked yet again and I wondered and so another begins.

5 Nigerian Celebrities Whose Reality Shows I'm Dying To Watch (and why).

Here goes!

MY YARD (TTRWT) - By BBB Smiles

" I go kee you tohday walai, ifanor kee you ma name nor be Oj". 

Does Size Really Matter?

Get your mind out of the gutter, it's not what you're thinking. LOL.

Thelma Thinks Match-Make Moments. (For Interested Blog Readers)

Good morning guys! I hope you had a splendid weekend.  So this is something I've been thinking about for sometime but due to a few reasons I've had my reservations. I wasn't entirely sure how to go about it before but it's been on my mind and there's been some demand for it so I thought I would give it a shot.

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Fathers' Day to all the Real fathers, not biological dads but REAL fathers out there who showed their children the joys of having a father. 
Happy Fathers' Day to all the strong single mothers out there who are both mother and father. 
May God bless you all!
....... Happy Father's Day to my dad! There's none other like him. I love you plenty plenty. I love you forever and a day my friend, intercessor, adviser, confidante, provider, care-giver, guardian angel, daddy! May God continue to bless and keep you. Amen. 
......
Happy Fathers Day to all the future and present real fathers here on Thelma Thinks.

My Top 5 *Speechless* Moments.

Although I'm not much of a talker it's not often I'm left speechless. But there've been a few moments that someone did or said sh*t and I was literally left silent, stunned, speechless. I'll share some with you:

My Before and After Makeup Pictures.

This morning I went over to make my sister and her friend up. I did mine and still had a lot of time on my hands so I took some pictures. 

What Could Be The Reason For This?

Someone left this comment below under Anonymous in the previous post. For some reason it didn't appear in the comment section but in my inbox (some comments do that). I read through it and decided to post it because it was an eye opener of some sort, like things you never imagine your kids doing, or the things your young ones could be exposed to. Also if you think there's any advice you have for the commenter, or if you've been in a similar situation, you could share. The commenter doesn't sound traumatized or abused but obviously she wanted to get this off her chest for a reason.  The comment below:

The Loving Cheat or The Serial Monogamist?

I just read something written by Ebuka Obi-Uchendu in 2011 but even three years later I can completely relate. Especially as I've loved (or at least dated) both types of men in the past, and I'm friends with same. I'll use two of my Exs *Teju and *Olamide (most of my Exs are Yoruba...) as examples.

(A not so funny) Joke Of The Day on Sex and The Wife.

The text from the picture below is suppossedly an extract from a sex education school textbook for girls, printed in the 50s or 60's to help women to enjoy sex with their husband and keep their home.


It reads: