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Showing posts from November, 2014

The Things I Want. (To Be Or Not To Be Specific?)

Hello people! Some nights ago I went to see my friend at home and just as I was leaving I ran into her mum. Just like mothers do, she began to ask me about my love life, if I'm seeing anyone and if we're getting married soon. I replied in the negative. On hearing my response, she began to reassure me that all is well and that all I have to do is remain consistent in prayers. She then said to me that when I'm praying I should adopt three things, the third thing she said was Specificity. 


Yay!!! This picture made my day. Congrats to Simi & Dr Sid!!!

Thelma Asks

Hey guys, I hope your weekend has been swell. I've asked this question to several people and the responses I get vary in ways that have rather surprised me. So I thought, why not throw it open and hear your thoughts, and the reason behind them. 

And... I wish you a beautiful night ahead and a restful Sunday. Be blessed.

Let's Play!

Who's home this afternoon? Who's up for games? This game is called Askalot (I just coined that. Lol) and you know I love to ask questions but this time I'm not doing the asking. You are.

See-Finish Syndrome. (Relationship Etiquettes)

Sometime back one if us (lemme not name you) used to be in this awesome relationship. She and boo were like two peas in a pod, they were besties, they shared everything, talked about everything, gossiped together, had great sex and were generally very close. 
But were they too close? This blog reader and her boo would lock themselves inside their room and have farting competitions. Yes, you read right; farting competitions. 


*Wole and I had been talking on the phone for weeks, we were yet to meet. Apparently he'd seen my picture when *Funke used it as her DP and then he pinged to ask for my pin. She hit me up and asked if it was ok and I told her it was, only after seeing his picture though. He was cute, really cute. I was about to give her the go ahead but first, I had to enquire. "I hope he likes orobo o! Because I know I look slimmer in pictures and I don't need anyone meeting me and saying 'I didn't know you were this big!' ". Funke and I laughed about it and she said she would convey my message and we'll see what happens. Wole mustn't have minded because I got an invite from him almost immediately and we became friends. 

A Woman's Story

A blog reader sent me this link from Stella Dimoko's blog written by SDK, and asked to share with you. It's quite a read. 

They were so in love back then and this babe gave him everything and part of giving everything included being driven to the Doctor's every two months for a 'Flush out'.

The abortions went on for years,every two months I think..He was rich and suave,the talk of town and everybody expected them to get married.


This piece was written by Chuba Ezekwesili on I think those of us who aren't well versed with what's going on, or have little interest/understanding will find this enlightening. 

So I logged onto Nigerian Twitter yesterday afternoon and found people abusing economists and financial analysts for speaking in jargons about the CBN’s actions. So for those who’re still confused about what’s going on with Nigeria’s economy and are trying to understand the implications, here’s a simplified version. No bricklayers were insulted in the writing of this post…at least, not explicitly. So How Did This All Start? First thing first, oil price fell. Why? Everyone’s increased their production of oil and no one plans on cutting back. In the US, shale oil’s getting cheaper, so there’s more oil out there…and we all know what happens when you have a lot more of a product — price falls. When price falls, consumers are happy and producers are unhappy. Consequently, nations that are consu…

Thelma Asks...

Hey guys! So I got into this conversation with someone and during the conversation she casually blurted out "That was the best day of my life". 

The Reason For It All...

Everything happens for a reason. People say that, most times without giving any thought to it. I've heard it said that everything happens for a reason and that there are no coincidences in life but sometimes I wonder just how true this is. 

Nooooooooo. The IJGBs Are Coming!!!

Good morning guys. Lagos are you ready? Haha. I love my city jare, the IJGBs are coming soon. 
*And BTW Lagosians, Kunle Afolayan said it yesterday and I just read it on LIB, GEJ is coming to town today. I hope you're ready for the traffic? (This news has just reorganized my entire plans for today. Mtcheeeew.)*
Any TTB readers coming back for Christmas? Would you be attending our blog party? 

So, last night, or rather this morning, I didn't sleep till about 4am. I just discovered a new TV series Jane The Virgin. It's a TV series about some Latinas, Think Devious Maids meets Modern Family. It's not only hilarious, it's actually pretty interesting. Check it out it you'd like a good laugh and an interesting storyline. 
And to brighten up your day, I present you 

If this doesn't make you smile I dunno what will.  And do you know some people are so frustrated with life that they never see anything good in anything... I was scheming through the (over 1,80…

Thankful Thursday!

Dear me! I've been so caught up with everything that I actually forgot that today's Thanksgiving. Wow! It's not a Nigerian tradition but still, I've been planning my Thanksgiving post for weeks because I have so much to be thankful for, yet the day came and silly me, l almost let it pass by. So you see, "Almost" isn't always a bad thing, Thank God for the gift of "almost". LOL. 
So guys, on this Thanksgiving I'm thankful for:


I know it hasn't always been that strong but I'd like to believe that I've come to a point where I've so worked out the spirit within me that like a body subjected to lifting heavy weights, my muscles have been built, my spirit has been strengthened. Turned out I wasn't so right after all. 

Dr Says- By Oyinlola Sobowale

1. What’s good for the heart is good for the libido 
2. Doing chores with boo ensures a great sexual play
3. The antioxidant found in tea promotes blood flow all over the body for brainpower
4. blahblahblah
5. more blah blahblah
6. The older we get, the better we should at sex and oral is the mature way to go

“Ahan! I got you right there,” she shrieked excitedly as her cat-like eyes roved the entire piece and settled on the sixth point. 

“You and I both; taking over the night with breathless moans…going south baby”. She conversed with space, leaping for joy as her mind went into overdrive strategically planning a sweet welcome for her oyoyo.

Dear Laila Ikeji...

I just refreshed your blog for the umpteenth time and this is what I saw

"It's the most horrifying situation I have ever been in. I feared i won't be here again. I had actually said my last prayers. Then a miracle happened. I will be off air for a while, dearies. But please thank God for me. Please. He is faithful"

We thank God for you. Of course we don't know what happened but I pray that God keeps you safe, healthy and strong. Looking forward to having you back ASAP.

Blog Reader Asks...

Tee plz help me post this. What do people think about getting extra help eg when a pastor gives you a particular soap or water to use and bath? I am a graduate in my late twenties but things have not been going well for me. I don't have a job although I do small business and I have no relationship, I have been single for more than two years. My mother's pastor gave her a soap to give me to use and that I should come and bathe in a stream. My mother is insisting I go there because her friends have gone there and it worked, I know my mother wants the best for me and she is very worried. The man is a pastor of a big Pentecostal church so I am confused. Is it Godly to use this extra methods to move ahead in life? I am asking because they say many people do these things but people don't come out to talk about it. When it happens everybody will congratulate them but they will not tell you what they did to get there. Please I want real advise, no judgement. Thanks

The Idea Of Him...

Good morning guys!

Yesterday evening I attended midweek service, awesome as always I tell you! And guess what,  I went accompanied by a blog reader; FNLP. Well FNLP is a new neighbour so I guess we'll be seeing quite a lot of each other, except that she claims that she's more introverted and reclusive than I am, so I wonder what kinda relationship we would have... LOL. I'm sure it won't be that bad though, we got along quite well. 

Dear Thelma... Re: Spouse With Overly High Libido

Please Thelma help me ask is anyone else experiencing this? How do you cope with a husband that has very high libido? Don't misunderstand me please, I enjoy sex and even if we spend three hours in bed doing it, once he has rested he wants sex again. I cannot keep up and he might start getting it from outside if he not already doing so. Please what can I do about this? Btw I have hinted at therapy but he does not believe that there's anything wrong wit him.

Living With The In-Laws. Yay or Nay?

My friend was introduced to her fiancé sometime last year. Initially she wasn't interested, then she decided to give him a chance, then she actually fell in love with him, then his people came to see her people (as per marriage). Now he has said that they will live in one of the flats owned by his family in a building where his mother also lives, as well as a couple of his siblings, both married and single. 
My friend was/is horrified. She's refusing, he's insisting and this is where they are presently; at a crossroads. 

Mean Girls.

Who watched the movie Mean Girls all those years ago, starring Lindsay Lohan, when she was still Lindsay Lohan? So Lindsay joined this new school and there she met The Plastics. Now, for those who don't know, 'the plastics' is a small group of spoilt rich kids, the popular ones, with the rich parents who get everything they want; designer school bags, nice cars, vacations abroad etc. Their parents give them everything besides basic home training, apparently. They're bitchy and they make their circle so tight that it's almost impossible for anyone else to join, and for those who aren't members, you must experience the burn of their cattiness. 
If they do not like you particularly, they will try all they can to make your life a living hell; gossip about you, taunt and tease you, ridicule you, publicly humiliate you, undermine your efforts and generally make you hate yourself. 
And guess what? They don't exist only in the movies. 
Of course we encountered som…

Dear TTB Readers...

Blog Reader Asks...

A blog reader sent me a mail and asked me to do a post on this. Since I don't know how I'm supposed to do a post on it I decided to post what she sent. 

In Defense Of Dating The Younger Man (7 Reasons Why You Should).

Some weeks ago I told someone that I dated a younger guy and she was appalled. Extremely appalled, like I'd just told her I eat life puppies for breakfast. I couldn't understand why... Sometimes a younger man is just what the doctor ordered.         Based on my experience and (general observation) these are 7 really awesome things about dating an adult younger man. 

One Of Us Is Bereaved.

During the last Open Keypad  post blog reader La Effizy left this comment:

Only On Instagram. (Let's Talk About This Blog Party Issue).

Instagram is one place that amuses me mehn, the fakeness poshness on IG is too real. LOL. It's only on IG that I see eba looking like cheese balls or some work of art. 

I've Got a Question For YOU.

Insta-Raid! Linda Ikeji, Toolz, Toke Makinwa, Rita Dominic & More.

So as I usually do on Mondays, I post my favourite female Nigerian celebrity looks from the past week as seen on Instagram and you get to decide which you love most. My fav look from this batch is actually the simplest and the most toned down, and that's Beverly Naya! Who's yours?

"To My Ayanfe"...Tolulope Alabi Pens Beautiful Message To Her Hubby On Their 2nd Wedding Anniversary

To my Ayanfe;

“Rape is Rape, Regardless of Who the Face of the Accused is” – ActressStephanie Linus Addresses Allegation Against Relative.

I just received this mail from Stephanie Linus' Press Manager. For those who don't know this mail is a likely aftermath of the recent rape allegations/accusations made against a relative of her's; Daniel Okereke. Prince Daniel Okereke was arrested over a week ago after a Unilag student accused him of brutally raping her. 

Read her message below:

Mena's Confusion.

This isn't just a story and your opinions and thoughts would be appreciated. Yes (Memphis) Mena is real and yes she is one of us on TTB. 

It was a beautiful day, a beautiful date, a beautiful conversation, a beautiful moment. Unfortunately the situation was far from beautiful. 

Update On The Brutal Assault Caught On Nanny Cam

Reports say the assault actually happened in Uganda. The girl's name is Aneela and after her parents saw the video, Aneela's dad gave the nanny a very sound beating, almost to death. The police came for him but after he showed them the inhumane video, they took the maid away.

Morning Brain Teaser

All The Snatchers In The House Put Your Hands Up!!!

Haha! Err, I don't believe all of us are so holy and innocent. It's a lie jor. Yes I know they say nobody can be 'snatched' as people aren't purses but I know you know what I mean.

Dear Thelma... (Housekeep Allowance. How Far?)

Hi Thelma. I am a regular commenter on ur blog. I want this issue discussed, the issue of men who run away from their responsibility by not giving their wives money and it's not that they don't have. At least when u don't have, the amount u will give will be reduced, but some dodge it totally. School fees, Mba (no), house rent - no, chop money/housekeep allowance - no. Yet they expect their wives to be fulfilling her own wifely roles.
I don't understand this, I want this posted so I can read the opinion of others pls.

YEEx For Women 2014

Calling All Female Entrepreneurs! Showcase Your Business & Gain Attractive Benefits at YEEx For Women 2014The end of the year is fast approaching and it’s time to give your business that much needed boost it deserves. Picture a gathering of thousands of buyers where you can showcase your goods and services and also benefit from financial, mentoring, training, sales and media opportunities! This is what you stand to gain by participating in YEEx For Women 2014.Youth Enterprise Exhibition (YEEx) Nigeria with the support of Federal Government of Nigeria’s YouWin ProgrammeEnterprise Development Center of Pan Atlantic University, Federal Institute of Industrial Research, Oshodi (FIIRO) is organising another edition of Youth Enterprise Exhibition (YEEx) Nigeria this December. This edition, tagged ‘YEEx For Women’ is for female entrepreneurs who are either just starting out or have been running their businesses for a while.The highly competitive business terrain makes it necessary for …

Mad At The World.

Hey guys. Good evening, It's been a very long day. Service this morning and was extremely amazing. Extremely. After church I went to meet up with a new friend for brunch which extended to lunch and then to drinks this evening... A whole day's affair. LOL. So basically today was the first date and having just come from church we started by talking about church and House On The Rock specifically. If I should share the conversation here it will have to be a post in itself so that's topic for another day entirely... The issue is still marinating within me and I'll share it when it's time. All I can say for now is I cannot understand why some people have a lot against that church. 

Goodbye Miss Subtle. Hello Soon-To-Be Mrs Direct.

So... Hmmmmmmmmmm. Ok. Let me talk. I'm shyyyyy. LOL. Anyways... So here's the deal.  My frozen heart seems to be thawing at the sides *covers face*. 

Thelma Asks... (How Much Is Too Much?)

Ok, so maybe this is a form of advertisement for the makeup artist Buntricia but more importantly I'd like to hear your views and opinions. 
When we saw this picture on Instagram my friend and I immediately zoomed into a pensive mood. $2000 dollars seems a bit too steep for a 4 day makeup training program, but then it's all relative right? What's outrageous to A might be very reasonable to B, and that's why in order not to be here beating ourselves up and chewing mints for someone else's halitosis we decided to throw it open and get others' opinions.

Rest In Peace Chaz B.

Today just seems to be a very sad day. I saw FNLP's text asking me if I've heard about Chaz B and I thought she had to be mistakenly. Not Chaz B dear Lord. This is so so sad. I just heard he's been battling with kidney problems since 2011... Like Onyeka Onwenu said; only the good die young. May his soul rest in perfect peace and I pray God comforts and consoles those he left behind. Chaz B was a great man and he touched many many lives, he will me missed sorely by many. This is so heartbreaking.

Shocking Video Shows Nanny Brutally Abuse Defenseless Little Child

I saw this video at about 1am this morning and I stayed up till 5am horrified. Last week when I complained to a blog reader that I hadn't been sleeping well because my nephew was sleeping in my room and he developed the habit of waking up at midnight and crying till I put him in bed with me, she asked why I had to do it, why not the maid. I was appalled. I don't want to go into too many details but that someone would even suggest that I or a mother leave a baby to sleep on their own with the house maid when I/the mother is in that same house was very disturbing. I know not all maids are the same but as someone who suffered sexual molestation, physical and psychological abuse from maid(s) I am very very very very very extremely very wary of maids/nannies and this video below is a perfect example why.       I don't know if you've seen this. I tried to post it at 2am but my blog wouldn't upload it so I had to lift this from Bella Naija. I wasn't able to watch it pa…

Worried Blog Reader Needs Your Advice.

Need advice everyone pls , so I got married about 9 months ago , have a baby, of late hubby keeps complaining about every little thing I do, I recently just got a job n I have a 4 months baby, don't have anybody helping me out with house chores , I wake up 5am every morn to prepare n come back 5.30pm now all hubby does is say house is not clean cloths not washed , etc I am really trying to balance it all but it is not working ,can anybody advice me on how I can go about this cos now am feeling totally worthless with all the complaining. Secondly whenever I talk to hubby probably like a gist , something we are supposed to talk over n laugh over hubby goes 'don't interrupt me', 'you are challenging me ' how do I tell him we are supposed to be friends and not a father and daughter relationship , where u can't oppose your dad( u can even so that nowadays) pls help Troubled poster.

Let's Talk About You.

The first four words you see...

Let's Talk (About) Sex.

If you don't then please skip this post, you're not mature enough. If you do you may proceed. Just to be clear; this post may contain adult content. (+18)

Friends Like Tonto Dike Wanted. ASAP!

Of course you can never know how true the things you read on the Internet are, especially as this is coming from the same person who just a few days ago said that "Lagos is a lie"...

If There's Any Justice In The World...

This morning I got to watch a few minutes of a movie; My One and Only. Renèe Zellweger played the lead. In the movie she was this flighty, lazy, irresponsible woman, lousy mum and runaway wife who could never keep a job and was constantly traveling from place to place looking for a man to marry her and take care of her and her kids. At some point she had to stay in her sister's home where she wasn't very welcome. Renèe who was unemployed when she got to town soon got a job working for a wealthy man who soon proposed to her. This led to an outburst one day when Renèe's sister got drunk and accused her saying "you're just like a cat aren't you? You've got nine lives, no matter what happens you always land on your feet. You do nothing to deserve it yet good things keep happening to you, you're beautiful, you've got two sons, two healthy sons... Look at me, I'm a good person, married for twenty years and nothing! Twenty years and no child" an…

I No Longer... (+ Giveaway)

Meryl Streep couldn't have said it better. I think I've gotten too old and too busy trying to make something out of my life to focus on the little things. There's just no time and life is too freaking short. 
Frankly speaking I've lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. 
Have a blessed day guys. 

And BTW a blog reader would like to give away a pair of shoes 

They're size 40 shoes and she has worn them twice at most. She bought them online so she couldn't try it out before the purchase and they're not too comfortable for her. If you're interested in this pair of shoes them please say so in the comment section (with your email address). She will pick who she wants to give it to. But please since you'll be picking it up from me, ensure that you live in Lagos and you/your representative can have someone pick it up from the Island. 
BTW Eziuche C and Joydanugirl y…