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Dear Thelma



TTB readers is it right for a husband to force himself on his wife? I know that wives are to submit to their husbands but some days I am too tired or I am not in the mood but my husband does not care because according to him it is his right. Some times when he forces me like that he bruises me down there and one time he forced me to have anal sex. Thelma that day I tot will die, i don't know how people do it but I was in pain for days. Even as I was in pain he still demanded sex. I love my husband but I hate this part of him. Am I wrong to complain, when someone hears my problem they say thatI should be happy that my husband still finds me attractive and that it is a sign that he is faithful to me. But why can't he listen to me when I say no, or don't I have a right to say no sometimes? Pls what can I do?

Comments

  1. Sweetheart, that is rape. Yeah he is your husband but he should understand that sometimes you are not just in the mood, forcing you is wrong, all he could have done is try to put you in the mood.
    Anyway try to talk to him calmly. Explain yourself to him tell him what you want and what you don't want.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
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  2. Up until now how has your sexual relationship with your husband been? Has he always forced himself on you from the very beginning till date? If no then what changed? There is a link somewhere and thats where the solution lies. Truth is you need to pray and ask some questions...ask yourself and also ask him and please if you feel really sore down there please visit the hospital for your own life's sake...do takia.....#JoyDaNuGirl

    ReplyDelete
  3. WOW!
    My Dear, Ur husband has been raping U. That's just sad & unfair. Esp forcing U to have anal sex! Like WTactualF.

    Listen, Talk to him, calmly, respectfully, a few tears could help. If he doesn't stop, talk to a 3rd person, maybe ur religious leader or some older person that ur husband respects. If he doesn't stop, report to any of the anti rape organizations around.
    No ONE should live like this. There's no endurance in this case pls. It's already a habit with him, it could get worse!
    *Missed U Guys. *Thank U Thelma*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ruth! Ruth!! Ruth!!! Where is it na?

      Delete
    2. Now calling ur husband number *U musto lemme*

      Delete
    3. Welcome bak Ruthy

      Delete
    4. Ruthy! Hope you good

      Delete
    5. Thanks Adah.
      BB I'm good now. Getting there.

      Delete
  4. #Nuffsaid...He's been raping you and that's really very bad. I think a very deep and heartfelt conversation should solve this though, he should know the damage he's been causing before things get out of hand.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My dear,I call this rape...my husband says when two couples are not in sync when they make love is rape forget the way we say it's sex....Talk to him,cry like the blog visitor said,tell him u are sometimes tired,or he should try and put u in the mood....Lastly,apply wisdom....TNHW

    ReplyDelete
  6. Raping you is not a sign of your husband's faithfulness and co..that's trash talk
    You need to talk to him,make him understand,Cry if you must,if that does work you will have to talk to your pastor or someone you think you can trust and if that doesn't work you will have to take the high road and report as Sasha said

    ReplyDelete
  7. Say no to rape... involve a 3rd party if you have to.

    ReplyDelete
  8. 'Force' is wrong irrespective of his status as your husband.
    Anal sex, if not mutually agreed is even worse.
    That said, permit me to ask: has his libido been always this high? If yes, then you should try and increase your own tempo; search for reasons that put you off mood and do everything right to address/correct them. I am saying this because I have some married cheating male friends who attribute their cheating to their wives inability to satisfy them. One particularly said that while they were dating, his wife was a 'tigress' but soon after marriage, the excuses began. In as much as I believe men should give their wives some break, truth is that no excuse makes much sense to men when their third leg calls for some action.

    If however his libido was not this high until recently, then you need to find out why. The reason may give some indications about the solution.

    I think this is a sensitive issue that should be handled with care lest he seeks his pleasure elsewhere; as previously suggested by some BVs, a respectful dialogue will go a long way. Wish you all the best.

    -F

    ReplyDelete
  9. This is just wrong. Forced Anal??? What kind of man forces himself on a woman? Talk to him if it does not work turn into an emotional wrecked woman next time it happens. Someone I know experienced this and when she talked and it did not work she resorted to hysteria. It worked. Crying outbursts, talking to herself, acting like she is loosing it hmmmm it worked. Desperate times calls for desperate measures. J

    ReplyDelete
  10. Talk to him about it esp when he is in a good mood

    A Bili

    ReplyDelete
  11. No one in the name of husband should force you to do stuff you don't want. Getting married doesn't mean losing your individuality.

    It's so unfair. Being submissive isn't the same as being subservient.

    You need to start acting the talk and let him hear you. Not just in words but in action.

    Protect your self and "arse". Cos in the long run, marriage or no marriage if his libido is this high, chances that he will cheat is still there.

    God help you dear.

    ReplyDelete
  12. No one in the name of husband should force you to do stuff you don't want. Getting married doesn't mean losing your individuality.

    It's so unfair. Being submissive isn't the same as being subservient.

    You need to start acting the talk and let him hear you. Not just in words but in action.

    Protect your self and "arse". Cos in the long run, marriage or no marriage if his libido is this high, chances that he will cheat is still there.

    God help you dear.

    ReplyDelete
  13. This is a characteristic of men who do porn and frequent call girls. Unfortunately, he is trying to live out his fantasies. You have to involve someone he respects, preferably a man, maybe a pastor who is discreet. Also, if he is close to a doctor, schedule a visit so d doctor can tell him d implications of rape and anal sex. If he injures u he will move on. Hope u know how to pray?

    ReplyDelete
  14. This is my testimony about the good work of a man who helped me..My name is Nina George and I base in London.My life is back!!! After 8 years of marriage, my husband left me and left me with our three kids. I felt like my life was about to end,and was falling apart. Thanks to a spell caster called papa Justus who i met online. On one faithful day, as I was browsing through the internet, I was searching for a good spell caster that can solve my problems. I came across series of testimonies about this particular spell caster. Some people testified that he brought their Ex lover back, some testified that he restores womb, some testified that he can cast a spell to stop divorce and so on. There was one particular testimony I saw, it was about a woman called grace,she testified about how papa Justus brought back her Ex lover in less than 72 hours and at the end of her testimony she drop papa Justus e-mail address. After reading all these,I decided to give papa a try. I contacted him via email and explained my problem to him. In just 3 days, my husband came back to me. We solved our issues, and we are even happier than before. papa Justus is really a talented and gifted man and i will not to stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man...If you have a problem and you are looking for a real and genuine spell caster to solve that problem for you. Try the great papa Justus today, he might be the answer to your problem. Here's his contact:
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    ReplyDelete
  15. I AM Dora Sandy i want to give thanks and i will always give thanks to drokojie who brought back my divorce husband that has left me for 6years within 48hours,i have said about this last week but i promised to always tell people about this every weekend so that those that did not read about it last week will read about it this week,i have been looking for how to get pregnant and how to get my divorce husband back to my life because i love him with the whole of my heart,i could not replace him with any body,one day i was watching my television when i saw a lady giving thanks to priest ina and telling the world how he helped her i was so shocked i could not believe it because i never taught that there are powers that can bring back lost marriage,then that was how i decided to contact him too because i do really need my divorce husband back,when i contacted him i told him everything and he told me not to worry that my divorce husband will surely be back to me, within 48hours at first i could not believe because i was thinking how could somebody that has gone for 6years come back within 48 hours,so then i decided to watch and see,unbelievable within the next 48hours i got a call from unknown number so i pick the call the next thing i could hear was my husbands voice he was pleading and begging me on the phone that i should forgive him that i should forget all that have happened that he did not know what came over him,he promised not to leave for any reason,that he was really sorry for what he did,i was so surprised because i never believed that this could happen,so that was how i accepted his apology and the next morning he came back home to meet me and still pleading for me to forgive him i told him that everything is okay that i have forgiven him,that was how we started again and he has Chang,i promised to say this testimony in radio station,commenting this testimony that now am pregnant,but still okay before this month runs out i promise to say this in radio station and i will sir, thank you very much.World please am begging you people to try and help me thank this man for me,or if you need his help here is his email address drokojiehealinghome@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete

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