I remember watching some clip of a lady who owns a spa in Lagos on a DSTV channel. I watched her try to explain why people need to visit the spa, she said it was sometimes imperative because of the Lagos grind, the hustle and bustle, people's hectic schedules which necessitates the need for the occasional pampering at the spa, and also our women need it because Nigerian (husbands) are... (She then struggled to find a socially correct term, seeing as she's on national TV, besides she wouldn't want to come across as an aggrieved frustrated Lagos woman) because you know, Nigerian husbands are kings. She said and chuckled uncomfortably.
This was done in seconds but I'd always watch her body language and look in her eyes, and I couldn't agree with her more, Nigerian husbands have been so highly elevated to the level of kings.
Most of my friends are married now so I get to see a lot and hear a lot. I get to see husbands treat very good women like second class citizens or outcastes, worst yet I get to witness the women of the older generation whom they run to for advice or succor, tell them to sit, grin and bear it AND go back and apologize.
I watch my friends' mothers and aunties say "the way to cope with your husband is just to follow him small small" ie don't rock the boat, let him do what he wants. Don't complain, still show him love and loyalty and he in turn will at least attempt to behave himself and make actual effort to treat you like a wife should be treated. They say once you complain, raise your voice, retort or retaliate, you're only bringing more trouble upon yourself and your home, you're only going to make him misbehave even worse and make him more difficult. Hmmm, each time my heart breaks; Lord is this what I will have to deal with?
Today someone tagged me on one of @conniegirlswag's post and I munched it to share with you guys. I need answers people.
Yes. I need answers. What's the way forward. I no longer argue that it's a man's world, but can't Nigerian marriages be marriages between Kings and Queens, as opposed to marriages between Kings and chamber maids, as is the reality of most Nigerian marriages today?
Good morning TTB readers, good night too.