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"As You Turn 30 This Year..."





Yesterday was the 31st of December so text messages naturally flooded my phone. My brain is wired somehow to not read through generic messages. So... If I get a text from you, I can tell by the second sentence if the text was typed specifically for me or if the sender typed and sent to everyone on their contact list. If it's the latter I don't bother reading through, so naturally I don't get to reply. 

However yesterday one text came in and I didn't need to get to the second sentence to tell that it was typed for just me, seeing as the sender thought it wise to begin the text with "As you turn 30 this year, may you _ _ _ _ _ _. Happy new year". I held my phone to my face and I wished it was the sender I held so I could give her a knock on the head. Seriously, as I turn 30... You just had to go there? 

There are a number of ways my dear friend could have sent her text without stating that fact (yes it's a fact, fortunately or unfortunately). I read through the text and came to the realization that the sentence was very irrelevant to the text; her message would have held just as much meaning without that addendum.
     Why then did she do that? Why did she feel the need to remind me that I've gotten to that point, that point of no return? Was this some veiled insult? Wouldn't her message have held the same meaning without her reminder? On and on I obsessed over this, maybe it's the fact that she's still got some time before she can be told "As you turn 30 this year..."

I woke up this morning and it was still on my mind. I haven't replied that text because I cannot trust myself not to freak out and then cause friction between two people that have been friends since 1997, so I just look at the text and continue to obsess.


But isn't it the strangest thing ever that I'm reacting this way? What is it about turning 30? Why has society attached so much to it, placed so much emphasis on it... Or are we the ones that put the pressure on ourselves...? I just called it the "point of no return", is that all in my head? It's just that.. 30 seems so final. 30. 30. The twenties are officially over. After 30 comes 40, then 50 and then 60...

     I remember several years back my friend Chocolate subbed someone on her bbm PM (the things I remember sha... Because I'm certain she herself has forgotten), she wrote something like "I'm closer to 20. You're closer to 30" and that was all, that was it, but that was enough. The fact that whoever had slighted her was a few years or months shy of 30 and reminding her of that fact, that was the ultimate diss, the dirty slap in her face. 

And now that 30 stares me in the face I'm left wondering why...

What's so amazing-interesting-horrible-frightening-remarkable about turning 30? 
And for the youngens, when you think about 30 does it make you feel some kinda way? Are you excited, do you feel dreadful or are you indifferent?
What are the expectations you have, what do you hope to have accomplished by the time you clock 30?
Why all the fuss about the BIG 3-0?



Ps; my friend is a good person (which is why we've been sisters since the day we both walked into JS2 V in Queen's College, until tomorrow... My close friends are all good people *big grin*) so I know it wasn't a veiled insult, but when I saw the text that begun with "As you turn 30..." My head spun! LOL

Comments

  1. No one wants to get old, and this feeling is made worse when you clock *the round figures*. It happened when we were 10 but hardly bothered because we were still taking parents' milk; at 20, the climax of our hyper teenage years and the realization that adulthood had finally arrived. And now, BIG 3. Hahaha. Don't worry T, by January 2016 I'll send you something like "As you turn 31 this year.." and I promise, you won't have the goose bumps you're having now. :D

    Stay blessed T.

    ReplyDelete
  2. As u turn 30,may u embrace the age with all gladness. Always look forward to the future with hope and faith cos 2mao must surely come.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hmm...the big 3-0. I don't know what the fuss is all about anyways. When I turned 30, I know I was filled with so much dread too because I allowed society dictate what and where I should be at that age. I practically screamed at everyone that made reference to my age and lack of ring with a toddler in stride...I saw a meek, soft-spoken me turning into a monster. I had to snap out of it, why should I let anyone define my success for me? They define success for a woman at 30 to be fully housed by her man. The end point is appealing but the pressure of the journey is killing most times. Why should I be filled with the thought of failure because of others ridicule and judgement? It doesn't even faze me anymore, I choose my own idea and definition of success and it's timing too.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oyin u look 22 u know,good genes u ve got;-)

      Delete
  4. Thelma, a lot of great things happen when you turn 30. Prepare. For the ride of your life. Happy New year.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thelma, a lot of great things happen when you turn 30. Prepare. For the ride of your life. Happy New year.

    ReplyDelete
  6. once people get to a certain age like 20-25, there is just something "unsatisfying" about getting older its normal...at the end of the day age is just but a number. it should be more about achievements.
    i don't dread becoming thirty (infact am almost there). i just dread not having achieved certain things at that age.

    A Bili

    ReplyDelete
  7. You're stonger than U think, Thelma! You are Part of my Inspiration...don't Look Down oh!

    ReplyDelete
  8. When I think of reaching 30 years of age what comes to my mind is "am getting old".

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm I the only one laughing at this post?
    Thelma this is funny I swear!
    I don't really care about my age oh. Never have never will...

    I just do what I always want to do & don't care what anyone thinks or does!!! Irrespective of My age. That shit is just a number pls.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Have been laughing since morning, the laughter didn't let me know what to right!

      Delete
  10. Me have been dreading 30 since I clocked 29 last year.i wake up with a constant reminder of my age & need to achieve alot.
    I feel u T,am believing it won't be bad afterall:-)

    ReplyDelete
  11. 30 was awesome. I felt like a full adult in and out. Had no ring talk less of a toddler and walked out on a toxic relationship. Began to care a lot less about opinions from others. Became more concerned with ensuring my happiness was in the forefront of what I did whether right or wrong. A few years later I can say my 30's have been some of my best years.

    Ps: I had more money in my 20's though. Lol.


    Nothing wrong with 30, own it and rock it.

    ww.pynk360.com

    ReplyDelete
  12. We all wish we dnt have to grow old,I think that's y u feel the way u do,but 30 cnt b that bad thou n it comes with the whole pressure from pple abt marriage n stuff
    I dnt even think abt this age Ish,I just focus on what needs to done

    ReplyDelete
  13. I don't know what to say. Maybe it's because I'm already married. I don't see any wrong in it. But she might have waited till March to send this message ...... Thelma, no vex again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL! Waited till March!! Thelma might still write 'why remind me I've clocked 30?'
      This post is funny!

      Delete
  14. I'm may not experienced enough to talk about being 30, that said I hope what I woould've achieved by then people will say 'He's only thirty!'
    Happy new year to a certain *Chamomile

    ReplyDelete
  15. I'd be 30 by May (no ring, no toddler) and am indifferent about it. Was worried about it mid last year but not anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I am 32 going on 33 and no be me do am like dat na calender! Its kinda unsettling in our own society where younger siblings like mine would remind me some 2/3yrs back when I say today na my birthday and they go...aunty Joy you don dey old o...in other words you no go marry?...lolzzz...i no blame them...lolzzz...even my mum was suggesting MFM as a solution!....lolzzz...its all good though but its a time you just need to accept yourself and try and be happy...things wil fall in place in God's time...at least now my sisters are saying 'you no go begin buy load for husband house?'....bcos now there is a Bae in my life....babe just be happy abeg...greater, prettier and better placed pple, have their lives in a mess at ones age so thank God for grace.......#JoyDaNuGirl

    ReplyDelete
  17. Phewww!!Good to know I'm not the only one that feels this way too. Once upon a time, 30 seemed so far away. Like joke like joke, it’s all in my face now.

    @ Queen Spicey, I'll be 30 in May too. We just might be birthday mates...*wink*

    Thelma and the rest of my fellow '30 in a bit' ladies, I really don't think there's a big deal in this 30 ish, it's just the society we are in today that makes you feel like one Methuselah especially when you are not married and all your friends are, with 2 children to cater for.

    It'll happen when you least expect it. For now, enjoy your spinsterhood.

    Silent reader...I love your blog T!

    ReplyDelete

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