Skip to main content

Dear Ladies, Is PMS Real?

Now, another advantage of having a blog besides getting the occasional freebies and pretty cupcakes, is being able to ask questions you've always wanted to ask and knowing you would have real people give you real answers. 

I hear and read about premenstrual syndrome and I wonder if people are talking about women like myself or aliens from Pluto. I say, maybe I shouldn't question it because when it comes to all those womanly, hormonal things, God singled me out and blessed me. So, even in adolescence I never experienced things like acne, pimples or breakouts. And I don't experience them before or during my periods either. Speaking of periods I've hand menstrual pain aka MP only once in my life, when I was about 17 or so.

Once every month, when I was growing up, I'd watch my sister writh in pain, scream, shout, cry, puke, swear, curse, flail and hyperventilate as she would curl into a foetal position, hot water bottle pressed closely to her mid section and look up at the ceiling with tears running down her face, as though an image of God's smirking face was plastered there, as she'd cry out over and over again; is it fair? God is it fair? Is it fair? What did I do? Is it fair?

And I'd sit in a corner, crying, because her pains were so painful and I could almost feel them, but particularly because there was nothing I could do to help, I didn't even understand what was going on. 

One day while she cried and I mopped sweat off her forehead with a wet cloth (it wasn't helping but I just couldn't sit down and watch her cry anymore, I had to do something, anything), I muttered, pleading with her for the thousandth time to tell me what put her in this miserable agony every month. Through the tears she smiled painfully at me and said "don't worry, one day you will understand". 

And it is my utmost testimony this afternoon that I have never had to understand! Praiiiiiiiiiiiiiise The Lord!!! LOL

Seriously though, I've just never got it. I've never had those overly heavy flows or long periods. I get confused and/or irritated when my friends say they couldn't keep an appointment because they're on their periods. I'm like Huh? It's particularly confusing because it's not necessarily about the pain, being on their period seems to temporary take away their zeal to live... I have no idea why, just like I have no idea what people mean when they say they're "premenstrual". 

See what Jamie Varon wrote in an article titled "How It Feels When PMS Takes Over Your Brain". 

"You’ll be going about your life normally. Make breakfast, go to work, come home, eat dinner, watch something on Netflix. Then, one day, seemingly out of nowhere, your mood will darken. You will wake up in a cloud, but not a good cloud, not a fun cloud. No. You will wake up in the middle of a fucking storm cloud and everything you liked the previous three weeks will be EVERYTHING YOU HATE.
    Everyone will bother you. You will question why you ever liked people…ever. You will get mad over the most nonsensical shit, like who the fuck is this guy sleeping in my bed? Oh, he’s my boyfriend? YEAH STAY ON YOUR OWN SIDE OF THE BED, DUDE.
     You will think of all the stereotypes of women PMSing and you will hate that you have turned into all of them. Damn it! The stereotypes are right… every single month. You will turn into a pre-menstrual Hulk and start smashing shit (in your mind) and you will curse the day you were conceived and had to be born with the capabilities to experience PMS because fuck anyone that doesn’t have to deal with this!"

In another article on Brainworld, Andrea says she finds her PMS to be emotionally draining. “It’s honestly like I become a different person. The normal me is gone for five days a month, and the new me rears its ugly head, cries, wants her husband to validate her and doesn’t want to get out of bed, doesn't want to go to work or have to talk to anybody,” she says. She tried taking antidepressants, but they made her feel even worse. 

Reading these, along with every other thing I've read and heard about PMS makes me wonder; is this actually real; is it something you experience and can relate to, or is it a myth...? or simply "white people problems"? Ladies, help please. 


  1. u are sooo frigging lucky!!!! PMS is a b*#$@ mehnnnn...the discomfort, the anver, the nausea, the hot flashes aka sweating like a fish even in AC...I could go on and least the pain can be controlled. ..but the discomfort...smh...its terrible! Every month i find myself praying and asking God to take away the pain amd discomfort! i even told my bf i want to get my tubes tied so i dont have to go through all this again...hmmmmmmm *long sigh*

  2. Thelma PMS is so real this has got nothing to do with white people o. It's like a different type of mood / madness every month. You can't tell which it will be. Last month my sister had to come ask if I was angry with her lol. I just wanted to be alone nobody shld Tlk to me or enter my room or anothing. U just snap at the littlest thing etc. It's a crazy few days. The other month I was shivering even under d sun while everyone complained of how hot it was my windows was shut for 1wk.

  3. Few times in a year I get cramps maybe the first day of my cycle. Some times I go a year or two without cramps. I have friends with crazy PMS though. J

  4. That PMS is real. I've seen ladies in crazy conditions just because of it and it can be painful to watch.
    Some don't even go away with strong painkillers.

  5. I know a girl that's always on admission in the hospital from day 1 to last day of her menses. When it starts, you will think she's about to die any second.

  6. PMS is real, and for some people its a sign of other issues. Exercise tends to help most people.

  7. PMS is soo real,definitely not white people's problem
    You are one lucky girl Thelma

  8. Thelma u are so lucky, PMS is so real, I start having pimples few days to my P,then when it comes, am in pains,moody, rolling, I never go out for the that five days, if I am supposed to be at work, then every one and everything irritates me,usually things that shudnt upset me wud,den I wud throw up and can't eat. During those periods I use to ask GOD yyy he made me woman.waist pain nko,kaii that one is even the worst. Mum says it wud stop as soon as I have my first child. And I do hope so.

  9. be small thing. One minute you are enjoying yourself,laughing and having fun and the next minute everything changes. I prayed but for where.

    The first day is usually the worst, the second day is bearable and the remaining days are free sailing for me. The pain is out of this world loss of appetite,cold,vomiting(sometimes) etc. During this period all I just want to do is sleep and be left alone.

  10. Thelma, I suffered from PMS since I was 9. The kind of pain that keeps me in hospitalized, drugged and weak.

    The pain is out of this world. I never looked forward to that time of the month. Chai, I suffered o.

    I wouldn't allow my Dad go to work, cos my mum felt I should be able to bear the pain. Only my Dad could. Console me.

    What didn't I take for the pain, injections, ogogoro, stout, opayinyin, etc.

    Praise God it all stopped after baby number 1 came

  11. My dear, I didn't have a name for it before but it’s so real.

    The only good thing about mine is I don't have cramps very often, maybe once in 6-8 months. The other stuff tho, its crazy, I won't even know I'm there until I start. A few days to the beginning of the period, I just get really irritable, every little thing gets me angry, I'll be moody and just want to be alone, and then these very annoying pimples break out on my fine smooth face. It'll be just two but they'll be really painful and stay in very strategic places like my forehead and chin or on my cheekbones. Then on the day it starts, as soon as I know I've started like this, it’s like this thing comes over me, I'm just really tired and weak and sleepy.

    My dear, you are very lucky o. I know someone whose period lasts for 7 days and its heavy from day one to day 5.

  12. Wow, people go through a lot. I only hv waist pain if I stand for too long. Other than that I'm fine, I even still do my sit ups nd work out by the 3rd day

  13. The first time I had menstrual pain... I thought my world was coming to an end. I didn't even know what it was. I just knew this terrible pain was assaulting my body and I could not understand why. It was crazy. I was in Jss 3 then. I got to the sickbay telling the nurse I was about to die.. she just asked one simple question... "are u on?" and I was like yes :s what has that got to do with anything... and thelma she laughed. I was like is this woman crazy. I'm dying and it's funny. She just gave me some drugs.. I slept and the pain "miraculously" disappeared. And from then on... this horrible pain every month. Unbearable. I would stool... cry.. shout... it can go on for 8 hours. it was terrible. For like one year I was in that horrible situation till I got introduced to "felvin" and then it started affecting my flow. I prayed and prayed. These days, I don't take drugs anymore and it has reduced to the barest minimum. Sometimes I don't feel pain and when I do it is bearable. So I just drink hot green tea or hot water. thelma just thank God. And then the breast pain too sometimes... being irritable et al. chai. Sometimes when I hear people give testimony about how God restored their ceased menstrual cycle, i'm like... ha! o ga o. Lool.
    The life of women... and some are just lucky! e.g Thelma. Durrrh!

  14. I have had mp just twice in my life. My periods are never heavy, and last 2 and a half days. Lol. Am I normal? Am I just blessed? #lol#

  15. Hi Thelma. I don't have PMS in terms of the hormonal mood swings, but my heavy flows on some of my days make me think twice about my activities for the day. When I was in naija, okada hopping was out of the question :)

  16. Mine is CraaazyyyyYyy!..Thelma thank ur stars you don't experience such. In my case, it lands me at the hospital.from stooliing(toilet)and throwing up at the same split second(jst imagine) yellow "malaria" stuffs coming outta my mouth. Even the drugs i take before PMS never work. I always just wanna lock myself in my room for d whole 5 days and strip myself naked. Then I start asking God why he made me a female
    Thankfully, the symptoms have all reduced to the barest, guess age is a factor.
    its not a funny experience!!!

  17. Have a cousin that used to have pain so bad she had to undergo surgery for it at age 15. She'd cry and mourn from day one till the last. It was awful to watch.
    Thankfully I've never had to experience that. Asides from the sudden colds, minor cramps (thank God for Ibuprofen) and pimples/acne outbreak that comes on and off, am basically fine.

  18. A close friend of mine was the first case I saw. She would cry, roll on floor, shout etc. Her face would be swollen like someone who's just been freshly panel-beaten. For 5 days, she would barely leave the house; the experience was horrible.

    I, on the other hand, have never had any too serious issues but I do experience some excrutiating pains in my lower abdomen once in while, as if something wants to force itself out of my tummy through a tiny space. And then, my first period (aged 14) lasted 14 days -off and on. Crazy!


    1. LOL.
      F, me & U na the same oh....
      Mine spares me the pain on some months but the pimples na die!!!

  19. im seriously jealousing those of u who hardly have cramps!!*rme* is well for those of us who have terrible MP

  20. Yes Thelma, PMS is very real. You are sooooo lucky you dont experience MP or PMS!
    Back in Secondary School, Once i start MP, i sit on the floor under my desk as i need to curl up, I cry my eyes out and all my classmates will feel sorry for me. Luckily,i was not the only one with the problem,we were alot in my class that feel same way! My period used to last 7days and my pain was for 4days but now it lasts 5days with 3days pain
    My PMS, i just want to be alone,i get irritable,my breasts are sore, i have hotflashes,name it all!

  21. I think a lot of us are mistaking period pain or dysmenorrhea for PMS which is more of the hormonal mood swings. I don't experience them, so I can't realy say. Where I however get upset is where women help perpetuate this theory that a woman becomes a monster when she is on her period. I see it as sometimes being used to excuse bad and totally unacceptable behaviour. An instructor once behaved so rudely and unprofessionally to her group of students, and I happened to be in the group. Trust oyinbos now. Most of the group gave her a very bad evaluation which could have cost her her job. After she got talked to by the HOD, she actually came to the group which included guys and pulled the period card. Saying oh sorry I was having my period that day! To say I was mortified would be putting it mildly. So if patients come to your clinic when you finally become a doctor, you would behave so atrociously to them because you are on your period? I am not saying people do not experience it. I am saying do not use it as an excuse to justify bad behaviour.

    1. Thank you Nubian Princess. After the 4th or 5th comment, I commented clarifying between PMS and menstrual pain but I'm only just seeing that my comment must have disappeared. In the post it's actually PMS I'm asking about, guess it's my bad for talking too much about menstrual pain.

  22. I experience PMS ,though not too bad. But mood swings?..Naa!..we are all in control of our moods and shouldn't let it affect others. Honestly I wonder how people get into mood swings when they're on their periods, though I know there's that feeling of wanting to be alone at times. But taking it out on others is just mean and nasty. It baffles me really How people do it.

  23. sorry to deviate from the topic..i have a client who comes to my place of work..and I have developed a lil crush on this so I searched the web for him and BAM! found him on linkedin and facebook (omgggg). what next ? do I just add him on linkedin ? facebook ?...then what ??

    1. Dear anon, you should post this ur question on a new post so everyone will see it. I wish i could help but i have a crush of my own too (not in the office tho) and i haven't the faintest idea how to go about "making the first move", I'll just wait for the comments to roll in :)

    2. Yes Anon, start by adding him. Go a step further by liking his posts and/or commenting on them......


  24. PMS is very very real... in fact , every month, that day when i get extremely depressed and at times suicidal, i know my period is the next day.. it continues like that and i'd just be crying my eyes out for NO REASON WHATSOEVER, and feeling like the world's biggest failure... i wish it was just a 'white peoples thing' o.
    and then the urge to eat... hmmm.. just find myself craving all sorts of junk that would make my MP worse....
    in short, to summarise, periods are a /is a (depending on where you went to school) BINSHHHHH


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Turia Pitt Suffered 65% Burns But Loved Conquered All...

Amazing Story Shared by Dr. Ben Carson on Facebook, i thought it is inspiring and i decided to share;

The Australian ex-model Turia Pitt suffered burns to 65 per cent of her body, lost her fingers and thumb on her right hand and spent five months in hospital after she was trapped by a grassfire in a 100 kilometre ultra-marathon in the Kimberley. Her boyfriend decided to quit his job to care for her recovery. 
Days ago, in an interview for CNN they asked him:
"Did you at any moment think about leaving her and hiring someone to take care of her and moving on with your life?"

His reply touched the world:

"I married her soul, her character, and she's the only woman that will continue to fulfill my dreams."

This made me very reflective. I just wonder; if the person you love today encounters an incident or accident that transforms who they are physically, it could be amputation, it could be paralysis, it could be severe burns that scald their flesh beyond recognition, w…


Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

One More Post...


He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
LOVE THEM and watching the season film of The Secret Life of
American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
See how you are serious dey read this story....!


A side chick is commonly known as a mistress or a woman that’s romantically involved with a man who is in a committed relationship.  However after doing some reflecting, I realize that’s not the only type of side chick.  I want to discuss “the new side chick”–a woman who decides to stay by a man’s side after he has expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words or actions.  So many women have made this mistake at least once in their lifetime, and unfortunately I’ve done the same thing. I like to think of the new side chick as an appetizer.  You’re there just to satisfy the immediate appetite of the man, but as soon as that mouth-watering entrée comes out to the table, you will get pushed to the side, literally.  Why?  Because that entrée is what he really wanted; he went to the restaurant to order steak, not hot wings.  You were just a placeholder, fling, temporary commitment, or  maybe even just a “good ol time” until what he really wanted was presented to hi…


I'm in an amebo mood tonight. Don't ask me, I honestly don't know why. Also I'd like to share too but I'd do that anonymously in the comment section. Tonight I want to talk about secrets. It's ok, we can all be anonymous. 
Is it true that EVERYBODY has a secret? 
Is there anyone here who doesn't have a secret? I'd really like to know; You're a completely open book and there's not ONE thing about you that you wouldn't mind other people knowing about? Please raise your hands up. 
And for the rest of us, what's something about you that no one knows, or very few people know? Who's got a dark secret here, or a weird one, or a funny one even? I really don't mean to be invasive but I don't want to be the only one sharing, plus I think hearing other people's secrets is quite fun, don't you think?

Let's Be Random Together! (Open Keypad).

Hey guys, a while back blog reader F said something about creating an Open Keypad post, where you can write whatever you want in the comment section. I thought it was a fun idea!
So who is interested? Comment on anything you feel like, ask me or anyone a question, talk about how your day went, your job, your interests, tell us something about you that we don't know, share a testimony with us, rant about anything you feel like, talk about your crush/boo/spouse/relationship/marriage, challenges you're facing, ANYTHING AT ALL! 
I'll only make one request; that we stay civil. 

(F it was you who made this suggestion, right? I'm not too sure and I can't even remember the post the comment was made on). 
BTW please Ejoeccome out come out, wherever you are!

Closed Chapter...

Hello everyone, yesterday a friend said to me, Thelma I love your blog, I've told so many people about your blog, I think you're a very good writer but I feel there's something you're not doing right"

This friend was the first person who won our beauty of the day contest back then in 2014. Then we had met just once through a mutual friend. I mentioned the blog to her and she became an instant reader. I wouldn't have exactly called her a friend then but yesterday as we sat down waiting for our Uber to come get us from Wal-Mart, she's definitely my friend and I knew she was coming from a good place when she said she had much higher expectations of my blog.

Me too.

But you see, in the last year or so, maybe even longer than that, I haven't felt much joy in blogging. It began to feel more and more of a laborious chore, one which I hardly reaped any fruits from.

I really love writing, I love sharing my life and my experiences with others and I've enjoy…

Adventures, Fun, Friendship & Laughter at the TTB Hangout (Lekki Conservation Center).

Nicole to Clare: mummy lets go. I want to climb that ropy thing!

Isn't Clare beautiful?!

Uyi et moi. Clowning. 

Mother & child. 

Scary af! Trish on the ramp. The chica loves the outdoors so much, she was like a kid in a candy store. She and Uyi took this walk twice! More power to them, you can't pay me to do this a second time.

Uyi & Tiwa