That's what men are taught right from when they were little boys; men don't cry. So you may stump your toe by the door, fall from the swing and gash your knees, lose something really precious and hurt real bad, but you're told it's taboo to show any emotion, to cry.
And so they grow up, feeling all these things but forced to suppress them. Because men are not supposed to feel, to have emotions or show emotions. Because emotions are for women, feelings are for sissies, tears are for wimps, and real men don't cry.
Nobody wants to see a man bawling like a little baby, there's nothing sexy about watching a grown man sob and dab his eyes with soft pieces of tissue paper, and it would be most absurd to see men shed a tear or two like women are wont to do at the first sighting of anything remotely cute; a proposal, a puppy, an unrealistic happy ending in a romcom...
Still, men, just like the rest of us (women and children) have their moments of intense sorrow, grief, sadness, loss, disappointment, pain and misery. And in these moments how is a man to express these feelings? Culture and parents have taught them that crying is for women and children, crying is a sign of weakness, and weakness and masculinity are two words that cannot be said in the same sentence.
So I've come to wonder about this. What alternatives are available when one has been told that they cannot afford to be perceived as weak and thus must find other ways to express these feelings? Or do they just keep them bottled up?
Yes. I'm inclined to believe that most of them do. And several years of bottling up these intense emotions can only lead to the creation of layer after layer of skin till one becomes hard and hardened.
And that's what a man ought to be right, hard? And that's all great and dandy; men should be hard as opposed to being soft, strong, sturdy, the back bone, the supporter, the one that's stays calm and strong when the women are hysterical sniveling wrecks. Hard. That's the beauty of maleness.
But then, along with being hard, they also become hardened, and here lies the problem. This state of being hardened desensitizes them. Therefore when some of them grow into unthinking, insensitive persons that treat others wrong, giving little or no thought to how their actions might affect others, it is then I think that maybe if men are allowed to feel emotion, express the less than pleasant ones, shed a tear or two when they need to, maybe then more men would be less hardened, more sensitive and a bit more empathetic.
Maybe then they would have more regard for the way they treat (their) women, have more compassion and think twice before they lie, cheat, and play ping-pong with a trusting woman's heart. Maybe culture should allow men to express feelings a little, because in doing that, just maybe, some of us women would be saved from the devastation of brokenheartedness, among other things.
Hey people, let me give y'all a little assignment. In the comment section write a mini essay for or against the notion; Real men don't cry.
Mini essay meaning it could be two sentences long and not necessarily an epistle.