Thelma is 6ft tall. There really isn't any striking feature on her face besides those full lips, yet somehow all those pretty ordinary features all add up and she's actually quite pretty. Her body is that of a woman who spends good time at the gym. Her endlessly long legs are full yet toned, extremely sexy. Her waist is small and her abs can only be described as being "on point". The diamond belly ring she always wore added more to her sensuality.
The reality show had been on for a while and now it was only 5 finalists left. They all wanted to be like her, like Thelma the super star biker. The final came and they had to bike thousands of kilometers, from Lagos to Ghana. Finally she had a winner, and she was glad she did. She really wanted the show to end so that she could get back to her life. And that's why when the journalist asked her "Err, Thelma how did you come to be a biker, and one of the best bikers in the country at that?" She rolled her eyes and began to walk away, then she suddenly had a thought and stopped in her track. She wasn't a rude person, it wasn't the journalist's fault that she was tired so it wasn't fair to be rude. "I never planned to be a biker" she began. "After my last relationship I was broken. My ex really dealt with me and I thought I would die. I lost interest in everything but one day I randomly got on a bike and I soon found out that I was a very good rider. I cannot explain the adrenaline rush I get whenever I'm on a bike! I started to train at it and train my body too. My success was my revenge to my ex and that is why I'm so good" Thelma said.
Please can anybody make sense of this, because I cannot. I will just go and be dreaming all kinds of dreams... This makes no sense to me. It's one of the dreams I had last night. I was this tall Amazonian with the body of an athletic goddess. In conclusion, I rode the bike back to Lagos and realized that I forgot my bag at the pack in Ghana then immediately rode back, my bag was still were I left it in Accra *sigh of relief*. I picked up my bag and started biking back to Lagos. On getting back I went straight to the club. It was about 2 pm, the club was packed and the party was banging.
LOL. I should add that I've never been to Ghana, ridden a bike, nor do I intend to ever ride one. I don't have a belly ring, and there's nothing remotely Amazonian above me. Anyone with possible interpretations of this dream should please come forward. Hehe.
Anyhoo, after several months of doing shakara I thought it might be fun to give Dayo a chance. He came to pick me up from Chocolate's house this evening and we went for drinks at the club where he works out and swims. He came out of the changing room with a tattoo across his chest; *Abisola*.
Wait what? I'm like what's that? Do you know he hadn't thought about it. He began to mumble. Apparently Abisola (not her real name, but the same number of letters) is his ex and they got the tattoos when "the love was shacking us" (already those choice of words take you down a few notches in my book. Dude you have a vocabulary, use it). She tattooed his face on her back. They were engaged but it didn't work out, now they're broken up and have both moved on. Except Dayo carries her name everywhere he goes and Abisola carries his face on her skin.
For me it's an instant deal breaker. But Dayo says I'm overreacting (I really don't care if I am, the deal is broken. If it were a tiny cute tattoo maybe I wouldn't be so freaked out. But across his chest? Mba nu!)
Would that break the deal for you, or can you deal? Guys would you marry a lady who has another man's face tattooed across her back? Please tell me what you think. I told Dayo I'm posting this. He insists that what I'm saying is akin to punishing him for something he did before we met. I maintain that our actions have consequences, and some farther reaching than others.
...Oh, about the title, nobody smashed anything. I really just love to play around with my posts' titles, sometimes.
*BTW the tattoo in the image above though (www.thoughtyoumayask.com); "Momma's Boy", what?! That's even worst than tattooing your ex's name. Ladies, even if Ex's name isn't a deal breaker, then you've got zero standards, or real issues, if you say this does not break the deal for you*