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When I was much younger, I had this family friend I felt deeply sorry for. Like, terribly sorry. So, she broke up with her boyfriend and his immediate course of action, after trying and failing to win her back, was to take his own life. I wondered how it must feel to shoulder that burden. I mean, she didn't commit murder, but wouldn't she somehow feel like she might have as well forcefed him the poison he ingested? I wondered how she felt. If she knew that her breakup would lead to his death, would she have just stayed on, not loving him yet staying, just so life could go on? Or did she shrug her shoulders and say "not my fault" and move on with her life?
Ever since then I've wondered about people who commit suicide because they've been jilted by a lover. I know the mind-numbing pains of heartbreak. I know we all have different thresholds for pain, but how painful can pain be to pain less than one's own death?
I totter between thinking that anybody who commits suicide, regardless of whatever they think or say is the reason, has a mental illness. And thinking it might be possible for a person to build their life around someone else, so everything they do, think, have, plan, foresee, is related to and hinged on that person. So that when this person says they're no longer interested in being a part of their life, they look but cannot see a life without them, and decide therefore that life is no longer worth living.
Whatever the case may be, there was life before a person came, surely there must be life after the person leaves, if they leave. So what gives?
A doctor friend of mine once had a patient at LUTH who attempted suicide. Why? Girlfriend said she's not doing again. My friend later said; "when you see the babe sha, you sef will understand why the guy wanted to off himself. The girl fine dieeeeee!" LOL. We had a laugh but it was no laughing matter. Had he not been found on time and had his belly pumped, this brother might be medical students' cadaver by now. Just another suicide statistic.
And why I'm so keen on this suicide after a breakup matter this afternoon, is because of the recent case of the 26 year old girl in Delta state who committed suicide after a breakup call. This is how Bella Naija reported it;
-The only person who is beyond disappointing you is God. In relationships, leave room for disappointment. Hope for the best, pray for the best, prepare for the worst.
-Don't build your life around someone else. While you might love them and make them a big part of your life; have your own life independent of them, maintain your individuality, do your own things, have your own friends.
What do you say?