Skip to main content

Dear Thelma... (He's Asking My Body Count)

Hello Thelma and blog visitors. I recently started seeing someone and I think I'm falling inlove with him. I am also praying that he will be the one because I've suffered too much heartbreaks and I hope to settle down soon. I know that he likes me too and he is very mature and comfortable so I believe that he too will like to marry soon. I am really praying that this relationship will lead to marriage but the problem now is that twice he has asked me how many men I have slept with, I didn't answer and he is becoming suspicious as if I'm hiding something. Because of the failed relationships I have experience the number might be too high, so I am afraid to tell him. It is not more than twelve but I feel that if he is insisting I will tell him 2 or 3, but I don't want to lie to him. Should I tell him the truth or reduce the number? I don't want to tell him anything but the more I keep quiet the more he thinks that it must be very high. Please what should I do?

I personally don't believe in full disclosure, especially in regards of things I don't consider a factor in the present relationship. But that's my personal opinion. What's yours guys; to talk and be truthful, to talk and be economical with the truth or not to talk at all?


  1. Let him tell u bout his and whatever his body count is,u either divide it by 2 or u find the square root and use the answer as ur answer.

    (2015 and some nigger be asking bout body count...hiss)

    1. Hehehe sasha boné the hilarious. Unfortunately even if his body count is 100 and hers is half, that's 50, she will still look like a big slut but his own is normal because he is a man. Shioor. My dear tell him your body count is 2. Anybody that asks a stupid question deserve to be told a lie.

    2. Did you say square root?hahahaha Sasha you will not kiii me o

      Simply tell him you will rather leave the past in the past.J

  2. Btw,its communion sunday this sunday at House on the Rock. Y'all are cordially invited!!!

  3. Why do people still press their (intending) spouse for tales about their sordid past? In this era?

    Dear Poster, if you're not comfortable disclosing your body count then you don't have to tell him, even if it's 1. Be wary of people who insist on such things but...if you really want to go ahead with the relationship it's up to you. Such people a more likely to judge your future mistakes based on your past.

  4. Your body count Is your last boyfriend plus him abegi! Take that number 12 truth to the grave with you, don't be doing stupid love and telling him because he will SURELY use it against you one day thats if the relationship even continues. He might conclude you are for sex only! So therefore DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT TELL HIM THE TRUTH. Thank u lol x

    1. God bless you dear, that was exactly what I wanted to say, your last and the present are the only ones that counts, so total is 2... useless guys are the ones who usually ask this question, they ask so that they can use it as an excuse when they want to bail out on you. My ex is like that, my husband never ask, all he cares for is the me he met... Be Wise dear.

  5. Just imagine..What is his business with your body count?So people still ask such questions in this generation & time.Abeg tell him it's two jare.Rubbish..

    1. GBAM!!! Body count can't be more than two biko! 3 is the lucky number so he's the one. Yeye men asking silly questions about the past!

    2. Ruth your pussy mileage has broken the gauge. Your body count be like 20 and counting. Ashawo.

    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

    4. Your shit is about to hit the fan. I have my champagne on ice. You don't know wats coming ur way.

    5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    6. Ruth... Your haters many oh! I guess you are doing something right. Lol

    7. She's doing something alright. Might be right to her but its gonna cost her dearly that I can assure her. Ruth u think you've got nothing to lose right? You wanna play. By the time i'm done with you and ur wretched family, if u can tell the story, you'll never go near someones husband.

    8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    9. Delusions of grandeur. I don't lose a moments sleep over a famed whore like you. And u don't wanna see my face. I'm not an angel like the people u try to break their homes. I can match ur evil in anyway you come with it. Physical and spiritual. I've been watching you strut ur stuff and I laugh at you. I'll come with a "fucking face" it's a face you'll regret seeing.

    10. This comment has been removed by the author.

    11. Ruthy who did u offend now,haba@anon easy biko the words are too much.

    12. She's a two timing whore who sleeps with married men.

  6. Yeye question, abeg tell him two or three, or better still make him understand that the question isn't important. For this 21st century na him person dey ask wetin no dey important. Shiooo.

  7. He's asking you such question because????
    Ask him the name of the first person he saw when he was pushed out of his mothers womb. If he gives you true answer then you tell him your body count. *ana asi na boko haram na atu bomb anyhow of recent, nna ano there na aju what's your body count. Mtchewws*

    1. hahahahahahahaha

    2. Lol! Queen spicey has cleared all thoughts off my head! O chim o!

    3. LMHAO!!!!! Queen! I do not understand Igbo but that line in ur comment cracked me up big time! Boko haram is bombing everybody yet this one is here asking what's your body count... lol...

      Madam, avoid the question as much as you can. Trust me, you don't want to tell any man that you have slept with 12 men before him. No matter how much he loves you, he will most definitely use it against you in the future. One argument will come up and suddenly, your body count will feature or even take centre stage. Just keep "qwayet" on the matter. And if the issue of your body count is too important to him, he can hop on the next keke napep outta your life so the range rover can drive in, Shikena.

    4. Amen to the range rover biko

  8. Babe whatever you do, do not ever tell any man it is more than two. Don't even understand why men ask these questions.

  9. Can you imagine such a question!!! Biko tell him 3 jare and be happy. Men aint worth it you know....

  10. Ask him respectfully to leave the past right where it belongs. If he cant deal with that statement then it might be time for you to move along. All he should be concerned about before the two of you get together is a clean bill of health std testing. The fact he is insistent on it to me deems he isnt to keen on being with you.

    1. Exactly my thoughts.

      A man who really needs you will care less about your past so long it has no serious implications presently.


    2. So true. Don't disclose the truth and don't lie. Silence is it. He might use it against you later later. + he isn't ready for a relationship. Kilode? Like Queen Spicey said, we are tackling Boko Haram and he's asking of body count?! There are more important things in a relationship than that.

  11. its 2015 and people still this question...smh
    Tell him to leave the past in the past and focus on loving you

  12. I don't get it mehnnnn! Okay! You want him to be 'the one' buh you don't wanna be honest? This is hilarious! Anyhoooo....Tell him the truth or whatever number you want and MULTIPLY it by 2....If he is not gonna be with you because you told him the truth then don't wanna go into marriage telling lies....Trust me on that one!

    And besides, what is wrong with having over 3 guys? Mehnnn....don't make nothing into something...

  13. Ok.... I'm done laughing.
    Dear poster, I'll echo Erniesha's point on not lying. It puts a dent on your integrity, and may create a need for a future confession, which may end up causing real issues for you both. Yet, I wouldn't advise you to tell him the number. Some things are best left unsaid. To that effect, I prescribe a combination of Memphis and Miss Pynk's comments. If he's so bothered about your past, then you may have bigger worries than body counts.

  14. Hehehe...the comments on this post are hilarious. Sasha bone and queen's comment had me in stitches.

    As for the answer to your question poster,truthfully I don't know. Am actually in the lie or not to lie

  15. When I met hubby n we were discussing about past relationships, I only told him the guy's have been with, it wasn't that serious n I don't think it should be if he really loves u. We made jokes outta it sef told him about 4 n half guys plus flings, 2 were serz n it didn't end well. That's all! I didn't say ve slept with 4 n half guys or 2 guys. If he's matured n loves u he doesn't have to press the issue. And I also asked him questions not on how many girls he had slept with cuz he doesn't matter but questions like if he had impregnated someone before n the likes... may God help you!

  16. Most of the blog visitors here are female. Because I think the question is very valid. he wants to know if you have been around the block. Nobody wants to marry a cheerful giver. Also, we dont know why he is asking, he might have heard some stories.

    Ill advice you say 4 or 5 guys. Construct the lie very well and stick to it. So that one day your tongue doesnt slip and you go mention a name you didnt mention before.


    1. Lmaooo @ cheerful giver!!! My friend calls it high mileage!

      Soo it's okay for men to be cheerful givers okwaya?! Looool! Continue o!

      Erniesha and Buby... thank you o!
      At first, I was like everyone is saying she should lie! Lie! Lie! Kilode?!

      If he can't handle it... then it's better not to even start abeg... I wonder why some men just want to know... but really... why?!
      anyway! I agree with telling him to leave the past in the past. If he insists... well... give him an answer that won't disturb your conscience or affect your relationship with God. that's the safest answer I can give.

    2. It has nothing to do with being female and there's no reason for her to be lying about her body count/past, or being pressured into revealing her past. If you say no one wants to marry a cheerful giver are you implying that cheerful givers have no hope? And by cheerful giver I hope you didn't exclude men. Sex goes both ways. She's not comfortable revealing her past, that's it. If le boo has heard stories about her it's either he continues with confidence or move on to *fresh meat*.

    3. Tnx memphis, my only problem is that the body count question is always directed to the ladies, WHY! honestly I don't like it.
      If you now really decide to check, the guy's body count might be even higher

  17. Hmmm, all I see is very mature....Dear Poster....please remove the 'very' cuz this dude ain't mature at all

    Only immature people major on minor things

    1. "this dude ain't mature at all

      Only immature people major on minor things"

      Spot on!

  18. Replies
    1. Me too o! I've been laughing hard here!

  19. This guy isn't feeling you as much as you think . Telling you from experience. Don't tell any man your number except he has proven himself or your husband

  20. Some Men and their silly ego. If you mention 12, you can kiss his sorry behind good bye, cos he will leave you. He wants to know for a reason that's why he is adamant.

    This ain't a mature fellow biko. If you haven't sexed him up, I suggest you stay like a mermaid for now so that he isn't another body count in your life.

  21. Since when did body count become a factor in a relationship? Nawa oo


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Turia Pitt Suffered 65% Burns But Loved Conquered All...

Amazing Story Shared by Dr. Ben Carson on Facebook, i thought it is inspiring and i decided to share;

The Australian ex-model Turia Pitt suffered burns to 65 per cent of her body, lost her fingers and thumb on her right hand and spent five months in hospital after she was trapped by a grassfire in a 100 kilometre ultra-marathon in the Kimberley. Her boyfriend decided to quit his job to care for her recovery. 
Days ago, in an interview for CNN they asked him:
"Did you at any moment think about leaving her and hiring someone to take care of her and moving on with your life?"

His reply touched the world:

"I married her soul, her character, and she's the only woman that will continue to fulfill my dreams."

This made me very reflective. I just wonder; if the person you love today encounters an incident or accident that transforms who they are physically, it could be amputation, it could be paralysis, it could be severe burns that scald their flesh beyond recognition, w…


Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

One More Post...


He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
LOVE THEM and watching the season film of The Secret Life of
American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
See how you are serious dey read this story....!


A side chick is commonly known as a mistress or a woman that’s romantically involved with a man who is in a committed relationship.  However after doing some reflecting, I realize that’s not the only type of side chick.  I want to discuss “the new side chick”–a woman who decides to stay by a man’s side after he has expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words or actions.  So many women have made this mistake at least once in their lifetime, and unfortunately I’ve done the same thing. I like to think of the new side chick as an appetizer.  You’re there just to satisfy the immediate appetite of the man, but as soon as that mouth-watering entrée comes out to the table, you will get pushed to the side, literally.  Why?  Because that entrée is what he really wanted; he went to the restaurant to order steak, not hot wings.  You were just a placeholder, fling, temporary commitment, or  maybe even just a “good ol time” until what he really wanted was presented to hi…


I'm in an amebo mood tonight. Don't ask me, I honestly don't know why. Also I'd like to share too but I'd do that anonymously in the comment section. Tonight I want to talk about secrets. It's ok, we can all be anonymous. 
Is it true that EVERYBODY has a secret? 
Is there anyone here who doesn't have a secret? I'd really like to know; You're a completely open book and there's not ONE thing about you that you wouldn't mind other people knowing about? Please raise your hands up. 
And for the rest of us, what's something about you that no one knows, or very few people know? Who's got a dark secret here, or a weird one, or a funny one even? I really don't mean to be invasive but I don't want to be the only one sharing, plus I think hearing other people's secrets is quite fun, don't you think?

Let's Be Random Together! (Open Keypad).

Hey guys, a while back blog reader F said something about creating an Open Keypad post, where you can write whatever you want in the comment section. I thought it was a fun idea!
So who is interested? Comment on anything you feel like, ask me or anyone a question, talk about how your day went, your job, your interests, tell us something about you that we don't know, share a testimony with us, rant about anything you feel like, talk about your crush/boo/spouse/relationship/marriage, challenges you're facing, ANYTHING AT ALL! 
I'll only make one request; that we stay civil. 

(F it was you who made this suggestion, right? I'm not too sure and I can't even remember the post the comment was made on). 
BTW please Ejoeccome out come out, wherever you are!

Closed Chapter...

Hello everyone, yesterday a friend said to me, Thelma I love your blog, I've told so many people about your blog, I think you're a very good writer but I feel there's something you're not doing right"

This friend was the first person who won our beauty of the day contest back then in 2014. Then we had met just once through a mutual friend. I mentioned the blog to her and she became an instant reader. I wouldn't have exactly called her a friend then but yesterday as we sat down waiting for our Uber to come get us from Wal-Mart, she's definitely my friend and I knew she was coming from a good place when she said she had much higher expectations of my blog.

Me too.

But you see, in the last year or so, maybe even longer than that, I haven't felt much joy in blogging. It began to feel more and more of a laborious chore, one which I hardly reaped any fruits from.

I really love writing, I love sharing my life and my experiences with others and I've enjoy…

Adventures, Fun, Friendship & Laughter at the TTB Hangout (Lekki Conservation Center).

Nicole to Clare: mummy lets go. I want to climb that ropy thing!

Isn't Clare beautiful?!

Uyi et moi. Clowning. 

Mother & child. 

Scary af! Trish on the ramp. The chica loves the outdoors so much, she was like a kid in a candy store. She and Uyi took this walk twice! More power to them, you can't pay me to do this a second time.

Uyi & Tiwa