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Girlfriend, Would You?


  1. Donate Gini?? Pls she should find someone else to help her out .. She and That baby will always be in the picture .. Unless his present babe doesn't mind the future drama ..

    1. Well said. Must he be the donor? His emotions are obviously confusing him.

    2. For the avoidance of future inevitable drama, please she should find another man. And you have every right to be skeptical. Trust me, issues will arise when the child(esp if he's a son) grows up. Abeg she should go and find another man oh!

  2. I feel sorry for the girl and I might be tempted to help her, but it will be very hard. Maybe if I meet her in person and she has a good heart.

  3. Donate and don't tell the current girl, put ur self in the ex's position. U already promised keep to ur word

  4. He should assist the other lady in finding a donor. Even if he wasnt intending on marrying someone else, in the future the paternity of that child will always be an issue.

  5. NO do not donate. It's a complication that can be avoided in your future marriage. A lady friend to a husband is usually a problem how much more a lady friend with your baby(that is a friendly baby mama o). She can go for a sperm donor unless she wants your child and not just a child which makes it even more complicated.

    As marriage is around the corner, you must think of how your decisions now will affect your wife and your unborn kids before any other person.

    If the lady is truly a friend, she will understand why you NEED to back out. If she does not understand why you need to back out then she is not truly your friend, and if she is not truly your friend why are you considering this in the first place. J

  6. @Tolulope Oyetunde don't say that o. Lets say he marries his current babe and something happens in the future (like she couldn't give birth), he will now spring a grown human being on her saying; meet my child! or dies before the wife at old age and she discovers a foreign name in her husband's will. Mba biko.

    As sorry as he will profusely apologise to her, he can accompany her to a fertility clinic maybe help off-set some of the bills and let her choose an anonymous donors sperm.

  7. This is a dicey one sha. For the man to have at one point promised to be a donor, that means the lady at some point must have done something really deep for this guy and that's why he is finding it hard to refuse to fulfill his promise. To this end, i will advise the guy to seek God for his next step of action because whatever position he takes, it will have adverse effect.
    Then if he wants to take the easy way out, in my opinion he should go all out to look for a donor for her, ( of course without her knowledge), pay half the bills ( with a promise to the hospital to pay the balance once the process commences). After he has done all these, he approaches the girl and informs her that he cant actually stand fathering a child that he wont be a father to, that will kill him faster than anything else in the world, especially as he will always be seeing this child by virtue of their friendship, so he decided to go all out to get her a donor and has even paid half the bills at the hospital and only waiting for her go ahead for him to pay in full. If your friend is rational, she should accept this offer and your relationship with her may either go south or west, but you sure know you have done the best you could do in this situation.

  8. Please for the sake of the future help your ex get a donor to avoid stories that touch. My two cent

  9. hmmmm. This is a very difficult question that needs alot of thinking. Very, very difficult situation indeed. One thing is sure, there is usually an emotional bond between a baby mama and the baby once in a while. I have seen a situation where a man donated sperm for a lady. The lady gave birth to a boy.The man was married then with three children. Fast forward to 15 years, the man's only son died. The man came back for this boy and the woman refused. The case is still in court. One of my former colleagues only child was through a sperm donor from her ex. The aunty is doing very well now as a lecturer, She has nothing to do with the guy as we speak. She can kill because of this child. Most matured ladies who do not have fertility issues will tell you all they need is a child and not a man(husband). The reason most ladies want to get donor sperm from their ex/friend is to be sure of the life style and history of their child's father. They are not opting for unknown donor to avoid the possibility of negative traits(hereditary traits and diseases) from an unknown man. They are ready to invest their life in that child without a kobo/care from the man.
    Most ladies that are doing well will never intervene in your marriage. For what?.. They will never even allow you access to their child for fear of you coming to claim the child tomorrow. Most women will even ask you to sign a document that you will never intervene in the life of the child as the father.
    What we don't know is that there are ladies who will give the world out not to be with a man under the same roof.

    Different things for different people. Oh how I wish I have the power to give children, I wish, I wish. @poster, if you can't donate to her, kindly tell her on time because there are 1001 men who will be glad to do it without going anonymous.

    *****As for women who are afraid that the child will affect their marriage******...dearest, its not in all situations.

    Hello ladies, There is this question a friend asked me last month.

    Dinma!!, which is better as a woman
    1. To be married to the richest and carrying man without giving birth to a child OR.
    2. To Have a child without being married.

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  11. Biko don't. Are you the only male in this world? you can assist her in finding a donor as a friend. Shikena!

  12. I wld advice she has a child for someone she knows than with a complete stranger cos either way, the child wld be a secret.
    As long as being a single mum is her option,she better make sure her sperm donor is a decent person in terms of character etc
    Whether she uses him or someone else,another woman is gonna be hurt in the end if she finds out of the child
    Even if she opts for a sperm bank,she wild still wanna know who owns it at least for the sake of the child when s/he starts to ask questions.

  13. Flippin da script...will you as a guy allow your girlfriend help her ex in having a child and just handing the baby over after birth with no ties to the guy? There is a lot of emotion that goes into creating, carrying and having a child and which ever way you look at it, it will ALWAYS come between both of you. We should be careful of the promises we make hastily in life though...I feel for the lady all the same but lets try and do it right and get anoda donor, you can help her there 2 cents.....#JoyDaNuGirl

  14. She shouldn't get another donor,is he the only man in the world

  15. I think the unasked question in this post is: Wld u marry someone who has a child for his/her friend?

    1. The unasked question in this Post is actually: "Would you marry someone who is willing to have a child for his/her friend?".

    2. When Oga leaves this world rich. Na there you go see families go come dey fight on top who be first child and so on and so forth

    3. Hmm @Uyi,who said anything about sharing money? Seems ur more conscious than women..��

    4. Conscious? How do u mean? Of wat dear?

  16. OR Would you rather marry someone who does not? (you must place those two questions side by side to answer the question raised by the post which is to donate or not to donate. J

  17. I had my opinion until I read all the comments now am torn*confused smiley*. Torn between the ex-girlfriend/friend's plight and how the girlfriend would take the news of her lover/hubby-to-be having a child with his ex....


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