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Dear Thelma... (I've Given Him Something. Now How Do I Tell Him?)





Pls no judgment I already know what I did was bad and I feel bad about it. My question is that I need ideas of how I can do the right thing. When my boyfriend was travelled for a course I met up with my former class mate who I had a casual relationship long ago in school. One thing led to another and I slept in his house. Maybe because we have already been intimate before I didn't insist on a condom, when I left I stopped answering his phone calls because I felt very bad and my boyfriend has never done anything so wrong as to make me cheat. I decided to forget about it and move on. But some weeks after I started having plenty discharges and pain in my lower belly and I suspected so I went to a lab and did tests. I must have contracted an std from that guy and I have PID too. My problem now is that because we did tests when we started dating, my boyfriend n I don't use condoms which means that he may have contacted it by now. Please how do I tell him to get tested without exposing what happened? Thank you bvs for your advise.

Comments

  1. Hia...this question eh....Lol..just tell him anyways...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chai, jamb question. Wait and sees if he contacts anything, if he does and he doesn't tell you or blame you for it then you know he's sleeping with other people too and you're both off the hook.

      Now, if that's the case then I dunno where you're relationship is headed.

      Delete
    2. So How will she know later that he has contracted std?

      Delete
    3. She'll have to read the little signs, if they are really close she'll tell that something is different. For instance he might start scratching his crotch a lot, he might avoid sleeping with her until he's treated himself etc

      Delete
  2. It the STD you contacted is the type that can easily be contacted from sharing toilets or even seats with a carrier like Gonorrhea, then you can tell him you think you've contacted something that he should follow you to the hospital for a test. After the test you can always lie on sharing a toilet. And if it is those with similar symptoms with toilet disease, then tell him it is toilet infection and both of you will get treated. Or better still buy drugs for both of you and make it your duty to feed him till the completion of the dosage by puting the drugs in his food (swallow)...

    Hope I make sense sha...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure you are assuming they are husband and wife. And they live together.

      Delete
    2. STD means sexually transmitted disease. It only goes from one sex organ to another during sex. U cannot get it from a TOILET no matter how dirty. Not even pit laterine. Just wanted to correct that impression.
      Dr. N

      Delete
    3. thank you dr N, toilet disease is just a name, STD is contracted through sex alone but haven said that, making use of dirty lavatories could also expose you to some pathogens hence infection albeit rarely.

      Delete
  3. Hmm, I know u said no judgements and all, but how do u expect one to read this without judging you, Its females like you that made me the way I am today.Cold...

    Well, I will still give u my 2 cents, if you like him and want him to marry u or if u see the relationship getting there, don't tell em. coz am a dude, and i will tell you for free, he will never marry you if he knows what went down. If he goes ahead to marry you after this knowing fully well you cheated, then maybe he wants something else or is going into the marriage with ulterior motives.

    If you go ahead and tell him, assuming he is not a he-goat himself and is the faithful type of man, then u will simply shatter him and bring out the beast in him, this ain't abt maturity or anything. Its just Men. Once u hurt a good man. A lot of women pay dearly for it, not just u.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Spot on... I wanted to start writing what I feel about this post and I saw yours.

      Nothing else to say #seconded

      Delete
    2. Uyi, vwoye? Should I comment so that you can reply my comment?
      *shinesteethandrunsaway....backtomybooks*

      Delete
  4. I am sorry; but I just had to laugh out really loud. My dear, go and treat yourself oh. If you cant tell your bf face to face, open a new email account, send him an email (tactfully suggesting he goes for a check up and subsequent treatment as a concerned citizen) and then close the email account. Just pray he is not an IT guru or knows anyone so they do not trace the source/back end of the email account. Just to be fully covered, open the email account in some very busy business centre somewhere in computer village.

    Meanwhile, Thelma; abeg make we talk this matter of chics and guys "having a drink or 2'' with their exs. Why don't they just move along and forget the ones in their past. Must they be friends and/or keep in touch. PLS, STOP LOOKING BACK SO YOU DO NOT TURN INTO A PILLAR IF SALT!! Biko.....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Looool... My sis keeps telling me this. She doesnt understand how I'm cool with them exes. I dont know about the guys in relationships but for single folks like moi, sometimes you just get lonely and have a temporary lapse in judgement..lol.

      Delete
    2. Lonely ke? Ahhh, you shouldn't feel lonely with good friends like Thelma naa. I would suggest that you learn how to keep yourself company and enjoy your company by yourself. When I see I am almost feeling lonely, I step out, go and see a movie or window shop. What is in the past should always be in the past. There is just so much drama in this world, why create more complications? The poster has created a complication which could have easily been avoided if she just STOPPED being friends or even opening a pin hole of communications. Abeg Ms Sunshine, if you're feeling lonely, you can contact me; make I show you how hunting for freshly boiled corn can be fun. heheheheheeeee.

      Delete
    3. Anonymous thank you very much for this suggestion, I have a very big problem with it. There's a reason they were exed in the first place, there's nothing innocent about hanging out with exes, na from clap dem dey enter dance.

      Delete
    4. Thank you ooooo! Steele and Anon! i was just rolling my eyes at her yesterday! she wie now be telling me "you don't understand how it feels" smh.... yanga dey sleep something...

      Delete
    5. Lol... thanks guys. After talking for like an hour with the supposed ex yesterday, I remembered why he is an ex cos I was just so irritated like half way thru. I kept asking myself, how did I evwn get her sef.

      @Anon, I'd like to take you up on that offer but you're anonymous :(

      Delete
    6. Heheheheeeee. Yeah, I know. I am always sooooo shy to show myself in such a massive blog like Thelma Thinks. Surely we shall meet in one of Thelma's get together. No fears, I am female and I am an avid hunter of fresh corn and cheese cakes.

      Delete
  5. The possibility of him leaving you after you tell him is high, he's your boyfriend n I assume you love him,tell him,I mean its STD,the earlier he know the earlier he treats it before it ,think of his health n tell him
    You may or may not lose him

    ReplyDelete
  6. Dear Poster,
    You should tell him straight on the same way you contacted the std straight on but get ready to lose him. Because if the shoe were to be on the other foot, you'd like to know.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Insist on a condom if your decision is to be sexually active before marriage. If you can cheat and bring back PID your boyfriend may also cheat and bring back HIV. I'm been real with you. This should be an eye opener to you girl. As per what to do........I dunno o. J



    ReplyDelete
  8. Is there a way you can feed him the medication without him knowing? In my opininion, except he's wayward too, I doubt there's an easy way around this.

    Wish you the best of luck.

    -F

    ReplyDelete

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