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1. When she says "Get my kini" and believes with all confidence that she gave birth to a mind reader 
2. when you say "mommy, I'm Sorry" and she replies "Sorry for yourself" 
3. when you ask her where you should drop something and she says : “drop it on my head now." 
4. when she brings food wrapped in a nylon bag from a party. 
5. When you say: “mummy, I have malaria” and she replied: “why wont you have malaria when you have been pressing phone since morning” 
6. When you say: “I came 2nd in my class” and she replies: “soo the person that came first has two heads, abi?” 
7. When she takes the dstv remote to work, just to punish you. 
8. when you’re watching tv with her and then she sleeps off and still doesn’t want you to change the channel 
9. if when you tell her you are going to friends place and she be like: when last did they come here to play with you? 
10. when your mum asks you if the food is enough and you reply no and she says go and drink water 
11. when she tells you "if I hear Peem, you will hear ween". 
12. when she touches hot pot comfortably without a napkin 
13. when with one look she tells you, you will get the beating of your life when you get home 
14. when you say: "my wedding will be baaaaaaaaaaad" and she replies: "God forbid. Your wedding will not be bad in Jesus name" 
15. When she tells you: 'I didnt kill my mother, so you cannot kill me' 
16. When she calls you from your room upstairs and then sends you back upstairs to bring her purse... 
17. When you ask her to help you with your home work and she advised: "go and meet your brother". You then say, "so you don’t even know it" and she replies: "Awon ebi baba e ni olodo". (it is your father’s family members that are dullards) 
18. When you ask her to refund the money you lend her and she tells you "all the food you've been eating at home nko?" 
19. when the seller of cow meat says "Madam na N7000 for this big meat, and she replies "Ahn Ahn, no be N1000"? 
20. when u tell her u love her and she asks you "What?"

Add yours (source Facebook)

Hahaha. Which of these is your momma guilty of? 8 & 9 are so my mum!


  1. Lmao. 3, 4, 6, 12, 13, 16, and 19. Because of 6 I was usually very uncomfortable with my end of term results in primary school, which were usually very good. Smh. :D

  2. #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she gives you the backhand slap
    #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she reminds you of your age by asking your age.
    #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she puts a mighty lid over a small pot on the fire
    #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she be busy administering drugs from her pharmaceutical bag even though she aint gat no degree in pharm.
    #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she screams your name from the living room to come say hi to an uncle or aunt she knows you have been deliberately avoiding.
    #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she gives you that look the moment you say you feel dizzy and nauseous
    #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she is a member of one or two"meeting"(s).

    1. Hahahahahahahahahahahha! #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she screams your name from the living room to come say hi to an uncle or aunt she knows you have been deliberately avoiding.... So my mom!!!!

    2. Lmaoooooooooo! I don die!!!!! This is my mom right here o! She will call your name loud and clear! Chai! She does this all the time and then be like... "that's sooo rude! why didn't you want to say hi... he is your uncle" lmaooo! and i'm like "shebi I have said hi now"

      Maybe not administer drugs... but she knows everything that causes cancer and ill health. from drinking water you left in the car to eating fried meat o! Ha! I'm like did you go to med school behind my back! Everything is "don't do this" "don't do that"

  3. My mum is guilty of 2,6, 11,12 and 18

  4. #You know your mum is Nigerian when she says, at your age I already had all my kids.

    #you are not a baby anymore at age 10, go and cook soup, stew, pound yam, and ground pepper on grinding stone.

  5. My mum can shout your name while you are in the parlor, Dinma!.. Dinma!! C H I D I N MA!!!!! aaaa. Ma!. I will just rush in and she will simply say. Give me that my blue hand bag near the corner of the bed. behold she is seating on the same bed o. Oh God I love you mum so so very much even with all those heavy heavy knocks you gave me on the several times that I can't count.

  6. Hahahahahaha! Number 5 is so momma! Kai

  7. Choi I can't laugh lol. My mum is so all except 7, 14, 17. Blogitup, that is so my granny.(Godblesshersoul) especially #youknowyourmumisnigerianwhen she be busy administering drugs from her pharmaceutical bag even though she aint gat no degree in pharm.

  8. Hahahahaha
    No 18 is sooo EPIC!
    The one advice I always pass to my siblings is never give mummy your money to save for you, that money has entered one chance, the moment you mistakenly ask for that money, your own Don finish for that house!! Loool
    My dad usually gives us money every month, even back then in my secondary school days,me being overly ambitious asked mumsi for advice on how to use my money, she said just give it to me I would open an account for you, then you take the money when you get to the University...Very sweet and wonderful advice abi, I said Okay oo, gave her all the money.. Fast forward to when I needed it;
    Me: mummy, remember that my money you saved in the account for me I need it now.
    Mum: which money??
    Me: the one you said you would open account with for me naa.
    Mum: okay, ahh what do you want to use the money for, shebi we've finished shopping for all you need to take to school, plus daddy has given you feeding money already.
    Me: Ehn, I know, I just need it since I'm going to school now.
    Mum: See, if it's that money that you are waiting for sorry, is it money that you are going to University to spend ehn this girl, is it money? After I took the pain to take you round balogun market to get you everything you need for school, we walked under the sun, looking for all the things that would make you comfortable in school and you are not even greatful, you are asking for money, which money...All the food I've been cooking for you and you've been eating since I gave birth to you nko, do you think the meat and chicken you eat everyday I stole it from the market...*continues ranting*
    Me: *promises my self for the 100th time not to give mummy my money again*

    1. ROTFL!!!!

      Nana Ama, your mum is the funniest! see story o... balogun market, sun, meat, chicken... lol
      As if popsie didn't drop that money. hahahaha..

    2. I yaf died!!!!!! Hahahahahahahahahhahahahaaaaa!!!!

      Chai!!!! Nana ama oooo!!! Your mom is bawse mehn! See as she just turn everything around! Story of my life! Loooool! Na so dem dey do nah.
      When uncle A visits and drops money, give momsy, Aunty B comes and drops money, give momsy. Fast forward few years later... she'll remind you about your Christmas dress and shoe. loool! Iya kabuoy did this wan daadaa.
      Moms ehn! You gotta love them!

      She tried for our kid sis sha... she even opened kiddies account for that one. 21st century children. their eye noh gree close. Kini mo mo to n je account ni 1998? Lool.

    3. This reminds me of the 3k5 my mum still owes me from 15years ago. Lol. I'm gonna ask her again just for laughs. Hehehe

  9. Lol, I laughed so hard the day this thing was trending on twitter..

    My mum is 2, 3,9, 18,19, and 20. You see that number 19 ehn, I use to shift from her side in the market cos I'm always afraid the eleran will just vex and hack us with the knife. Mehn... mumsie can price meat for Africa.

    No 5, and 17 are my Grandma. Hers is with "telefisun". She's like, "why won't you have malaria? Don't you know that too much television has adverse effect on your body?" and I'll be like, "so which college of medicine did you learn that one from now?" That woman is hilarious mehn. And that number 17, all my dad's enemies and his family members have been talked back to by my If its something bad you said, it goes to "your daddy's enemies" if its something funny, it goes to "all the people in your father's house"

    Then number 16 is so popsie. Tht thing can be very vexing. You'll almost be asleep like this, you'll just hear your name, you rush to the sitting room and he says "get me a pillow" or "bring me the remote" bear in mind that the remote is just like 2 steps away o and if you stretch well enough sef, you will reach it.

    whew! God bless our parents.

    1. Sunshine! You forgot number 8! When we'll be begging momsy to let us finish watching a movie and she'll insist that it is channels news @ 10 she wants to watch... 5mins into the news, she's asleep. If you change the station penren like this before she wakes up, and she finds out! You will hear it! The tin dey always pepper me ehn! Am like what kind of thing is this! You're not watching it! You don't want me to watch my own! Anyway... I guess that's why she's mom!

      Then number 3! Chai! Our kid sis was always confused! Mom is the queen of sarcasm!
      Kid sis: Mommy can I take 2 pieces of meat...
      Mum: no, take 4!
      Kid sis: *brightens up* really?!!! Thank yoooou!
      Mum: ti mo ba fun e ni igbaju
      Kid sis: *confused face*
      Sunshine and I : *lmaooooo* when will you learn?!!!!

      Then she does 17 ooo! Very well sef! I think ijebu women do this a lot! Lmaoo!
      Just this sunday, I told her to help us buy vegetables, fish, ponmo, chicken and pepper on her way. She then said my bill was 1800... I was like ehn? ni kini? Won ti gba yin o!(they've duped you) Lmaooo!
      Trust the reply! Baba e ni won ma gba! Lmaoo! I'm like! Wetin consine popsy for this matter now! Lool! Ijebu mothers do this a lot! Looool! Everything! Awon ara ilu baba yin! Loool!

      Mehn!!! I love love my mom!

  10. Hehehe this thing makes me remember my mum. Number 15 is so so my mum eh.

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  12. no 1 oo, both my mum and dad are guilty.
    And they'll tell me "you are supposed to be intelligent enough to know what I want" smh

    1. Hahaha! Dats so my mum. She will say you know what i mean and you are still asking. Duuuuh! 'm i a mind reader? Chai! My mum is guilty of alot here lmao.

  13. Nigerian mums, very unique.
    My mum had taken a pot of soup to her shop so my elder brother and cohorts wouldn't eat out of it. She's so guilty of some of the 'offences' listed above. Unfortunately, I am exhibiting traits of some of those charateristics


  14. @ F: Pot of soup to her shop. Hilarious.

  15. Lol @ when she reminds you of your age by asking you your age" classic!

  16. This comment has been removed by the author.

  17. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha I so hated going to the market with my mum. She would slash the price of an item by over 70% and call it good bargaining. My prayers were always directed to the gods of the ground that I may just be swallowed up at those moments but guess what her bargaining worked...sometimes.

    And of course the #igbarun #iforun #igbati episodes. Step on water poured by people on the road and you'll hear gbosa from behind. Till date when I walk on the road I side-step wherever I see wet ground except if wetness was caused by rain.

  18. My mum is guilty of most oooo Kai!

  19. Thelma pls let me add one more.
    if you know say na me born you make sure you bring back the fridge I bought for you when you gained admission in to that your school.

  20. Ijebu mothers are endowed with virtually all!

  21. Thelma I'm soo wt u on 8&9. Typical of my mum
    Funny post.


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