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The Only Man I Cook For!

My heart was racing even before I woke up. He's coming today, my eyes flew open! He'd already informed me that he wanted to eat when he gets here, and living solitarily for now, I knew I probably didn't have anything edible at home so rushing to the market was the only option. Market runs done, I put my mittens on and got cooking. Last minute, it occured to me that this meal would go very well with some very succulent dodo. 

Once again I jumped into the car and sped to the closest roundabout to buy a bunch of plantain. I needed food to be ready and served when he got here. Lastly, I needed to check the drinks, check that they were chilled, he had hinted at juice but I threw in a few sodas, just in case. Oh there was also mention of chocolates and thankfully I have lots of those at home, he would have more than enough when he gets here. 

You see, I aim to please my men, I don't let it be said that there's something wanting, something more I could have done, something extra that's missing. No missy! I aim to please, completely; whether it's a lover, a platonic friend or a blog reader. Yes, it was a blog reader. Uyi was coming over and if he was coming all the way, then I would see to it that he left a satisfied customer. 


The day was very interesting, well Uyi is very interesting so it's only to be expected. After getting fed, we.......... Honestly I have no idea what we did and where all the time went, it was a whole day and it was gone in a flash! But as they say; time flies when you're having fun, right?

We then decided to hit the road, with no clear plan. Of course options in Nigeria are often either food-centric or movies. We chose movies, and if you haven't seen The Intern then you should! It's a very beautiful movie starring Robert Deniro and Anne Hathaway. It was a near-perfect movie, everything was perfect, save for the couple sitting to my left. If I didn't know better I'd have thought the guy was partially blind and deaf. I mean, the movie is no Matrix or Inception, yet he needed her to explain what was going on at each step of the way; what did he say? Why did he say it? What just happened? What is going to happen? Why are they laughing? Why is she crying? Aaaaargh! And the chica would painstakingly answer all his questions. Love, love in a beautiful thing. I mean at some point I could see them kissing from the corner of my eye. She's a better person than I am; if I have to explain everything to you at every other scene, you ain't getting no sugar, you've completely killed my vibe!

But doesn't it make you think? You know how nobody is perfect? Yeah our lovers come with flaws just like everyone else, but most people have that one thing they do or say that gets our goat. That one thing your boo does that drives you up the wall! You know what I'm talking about, yeah? Please share with me bae's most ANNOYING mannerism(s). Hehehe!

I'm currently talking to this pretty cool guy whom I like quite a lot, but jeez can he belabor a point!!! Like he can repeat the same thing over and over and over again and in the slowest, most infuriating manner that you just want to tear your hair out and feed it to yourself! LOL. Still, I like him though. 


Ps; of course Uyi isn't the only man I cook for ooooooo, just in case you were wondering. Some days ago I talked about meeting Memphis through my blog. Uyi is another special person I met through the blog, and there are many others who are just as special. But what's even more beautiful is seeing people who met on my blog form strong friendships, business relationships and romantic relationships. Apparently quite a lot goes on behind the scenes, I've got my eyes on y'all and I'm loving it!


  1. All I saw or is seeing is a beautiful spotless face, gorgeous smile, white teeth and banging bod (like my younger sister always call it) which I wish were all mine. I'm also seeing a handsome blog reader called Uyi.

    It's nice to know that you guys had fun. Cheers!

    1. Who has the banging body ?

    2. Anonymous please can we see your picture, if not then go and hang yourself.

    3. Anonymous 8:45. Calm the heck down. the anon only asked a question. He or she might be wondering if Hope N was referring to the Handsome young man. You people just like to stir up trouble even when there is none.

      Thelma u look good jare.
      Uyi one love bro.

    4. LOL Bloggitup thanks. I wont be surprised if this is Thelma herself because most times she is always so defensive, because that was an innocent question, is it Thelma or Uyi with the banging body! Simple question o! nawa.

  2. Finally thelma removed her braids. Praise God.

    1. Hopefully Thelma's matter will not kill you

    2. Lmaoo @ thelma's matter will not kill you! I say a big amen to that!

    3. Haahahahahahahha, anon u wicked ojhh. Lamao. I hope so too. Lol . Uyi and eyeballs, nice pictures.

    4. as in she removed her is that a/ur problem???

  3. Uyi when you open your eyes that wide you look like pinocchio. Lol. Very lovely pictures guys. :D

    1. Thought we were jealous n torchlighting them, not complimenting the pictures... well at least u said he looks like pinocchio. #stilljealoustho#

    2. Lmao. Yes ke..we're still jealous.

      *straight face at them*

  4. Behind the scene things ke... and thelma you've not even given us the scoop! Ha! Oya Oya nah! Tell us nah... hints.. names?

  5. i am officially jealous..*strolls away*..nxt time pls invite me...*continues to stroll away*

  6. Uyi with the mischievious looks.
    T all I see is fine smile and hair. U really look gud in these photos.

    1. Yeah she looks good... Except me sha.! With the big

  7. Behind the scene things ke... and thelma you've not even given us the scoop! Ha! Oya Oya nah! Tell us nah... hints.. names?

  8. Thelma please are these home visits and home cooking available for any blog reader or only a selected few? Please let us know the formula, do we have to apply? I can see you have favourites.

  9. Thelma my husband's annoying habit is his snoring, it is really stopping me from sleeping well and I am on the verge of suggesting sleeping separate rooms. I know it is not good but this one is too much.

    1. Lollllllll,lamao. This is so hilarious, okay sorry am.laughing but have u tried telling him about it and maybe he could change sleeping positions? Sometimes even as a lady, I snore but that's only when am fu**ingly tired or I sleep faced up. So try and watch the position he sleeps with and help him change and see if it stops.

  10. Enjoyment galore..... You guys had fun i can see. keep it up
    Ehen as for the behind the scene gist you talked about *clears throat*

  11. The infuriating guy you mentioned must be my brother, sounds exactly like him to over-flog à point. Uyi and Thelma...iiiiiiiii haaaaave à dream!

  12. U love gowns alot.. U look so beautiful..

  13. Mittens?
    Really Thelma? Lmao.
    1st off, u don't cook with mittens. Mittens are fingerless gloves used just to protect ur palms wen removing sumtn from the oven. I know you want to sound all well travelled with these words. And Soda? Lmao. U havnt even ever left the shores of Naija ever before. Relax ok? Lmao

    1. **Sigh** Nothing is that serious.

    2. Hian... y r u soo petty anonymous. From your comments, you are obviously a lady.

      Comment with ur I.D, and stop playing this hide and seek games. Mtcheww *hater..

      Nice pictures...

    3. This anon has serious issues .. I actually feel sorry for u

    4. Mehn! "Hopefully Thelma's matter will not kill you". The amount of bile in your system tho, its unhealthy. Whatever she did to you, can't you just call her up, hash it out and end it? All thees behind the scenes hating is not good for anyone.

    5. Na wa o,this anonymous person you must know thelma or have a personal ish with her.
      Its not even constructive criticism at all.
      What if she stores her mittens away and brought it out that day to bring things out from the oven as your educated and widely travelled self said?
      Seriously chill out, its never that serious you know.


    6. This anon has time sha..So of all the things written up there,it was these two things you saw. Continue you hear.

  14. Hmm... so I made a comment earlier today explaining an encounter with Thelma and my honest observations, but the comment is yet to be published. Yet I can see other comments made hours after mine.

    I think I was pretty civil in my comment, so I am surprised, especially when I see way worse comments from others including some on this post. Interesting...

  15. Nice pics....Thelma looks stunning

  16. Thelma and the blog readers are fine sha.

  17. To comment on this blog is not easy had to switch to phone browser

  18. Both of you should think about hooking up for real Dimakunne Chekwube

    1. Hooking up how? So Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher.


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Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
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He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
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swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
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After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
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electrovalent bonds....

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with a packet of durex condom.
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Question of The Day.

TTB readers doesn't this tweet below remind you of something?
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