30 has been an interesting age so far, there's not been any other like this. There are things that I love love love about thirty. But this post is not about the things I love. It's about some of the things I do not love. Specifically the boy-girl things. Dating has suddenly become so hard, it's already difficult finding a decent single man to date, but it turns out the older you get the smaller the pool becomes.
So last week my friend calls me and out of the blues starts prophesying doom telling me how I need to think back and imagine who from my past might pop up and propose to me. I tell her everyone I dated in the past is either married or not a 'viable' candidate. She begins to admonish me; I need to realize that at my age it's unlikely that I'm going to meet someone new and it's most likely that it's someone from the past I would settle down with. Of course we eliminate those already married, and I must begin to eliminate the factors in the others that make me think as not viable; ie forego any "standards" or whatever silly ideas I might have.
The next morning I wake up to this message below from another friend. You see where I asked her if she and *Soso had discussed me?
So once again I'm reminded that it's "only people from the past". I refuse to accept this. Wholeheartedly. Neither do I understand the concept of it being difficult to start a relationship with someone new. Even people in their 40s meet new people and start relationships with them. When did 30 become the new 50? I don't get this.
Now there's this other issue of lowering standards the older one gets. Quick question; besides desperation, is there any other reason for lowering standards? Let's assume my standards were reasonable four, five years ago, is still being single at 30, reason enough to lower them?
I refuse to succumb to the pressure.
Now the issue isn't necessarily about standards. The guy in question is a Yoruba man and a Muslim. Are those things that you think I should be able to overlook?
So do tell, do I need to dust off my phonebook and call up all them brothers from all those years ago, as the chances of meeting someone new are super slim or non-existent?
And I understand that individually tribe and religion shouldn't be factors. But when both persons are of different tribes and religions, should it be an issue or not?
*Oh, I also do pray for the gift of discernment and an ability to "recognize him when he does appear*