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Dear Thelma... (A Friend In Need...)

Good morning T and the house. Please I need your advice on this issue. My best friend hooked up with her ex who was visiting the country and they didn't use protection because they used to be in a serious relationship. Now he has gone back to Canada and now she is pregnant. He is engaged even and his wife to be too is pregnant. My friend does not want to keep the baby which I think is the best idea she can have for now. My problem is that she wants me to follow her to the clinic because she cannot go alone. I have never done an abortion because  I am always very careful and I know abortion is not an option for me, because I feel like it is a big sin, like murder. I have heard pastors say that if you escort someone for an abortion you are just as guilty as the person in the eyes of God, is this true? Apart from that anything can happen there and I might be held responsible. Please I need advise, she is an only girl and doesn't have much friends she can trust except me so I know she needs me, but I don't really feel comfortable going there. Please what should I do?


  1. You agree with her decision so you are already guilty.

  2. My inner mind thinks the poster is the one pregnant. Poster, kindly tell your friend to keep the baby. This child will be great in future. This child will be a source of great joy to her family. I guess its a boy. Don't touch this child.. Thus says the holy spirit. LOL

  3. Damning the consequences of her actions...

    She needs to keep that baby!!!! How many tines are we going to say abortion is not an option?

    Do people know that when u take postinor within three days of having unprotected sex, you won't be pregnant?

    Trying to abort is like adding insult upon injury! *sigh!

    1. Uyi how many postinor have you taken?

    2. And how many have been effective?

    3. Lool,uyi postinor fails sometimes,it isn't 100% effective in all cases.

    4. Is there anything that's 100% effective? Lol

  4. This is a tough one o. The first idea that popped in my head after reading this is to inform her mum or a family member anonymously. That way, the weight would be lifted off your shoulder a bit.

  5. I think u should come up with an excuse on that day mehn. Something very believable, even it means faking a call in d morning of that day, anything that ll make her understand that its not really ur intentions not to be with her on that day...
    Personally I can make up excuses 4 africa!

  6. Dear poster,abortion is a sin,if u follow her to the clinic,u are as guilty as ur frnd,she should keep the baby,she should have thought of d consequences of skin to skin bfa this,now she want to terminate an innocent baby,been a single mom is not a crime though,but killing an unborn child is .

    Mz indomie says so.

  7. It's not the best idea. The best idea would have been to use protection or better still, not have sex. Thank God it's a baby and not an STD. Tell her to take responsibility for her actions and keep the baby. The guilt that follows will keep her mind in captivity. You are already feeling guilty and you're not the one considering the abortion. Anything can go wrong, her life, her womb, her fertility .... please tell her to rethink, it's murder, however you look at it.

  8. I can't help but first state how stupid some girls can be. Your friend was very stupid. Your ex, that did not see it fit to engage you or marry you, you come and open leg for him. Anyway no point throwing the baby with the bath water.

    That said, the best advise is to keep the baby. You can either talk her into seeing reason or have no part in it.

    She is a grown adult and I hope she works, - assume so, since she has money for abortion) so that incase the sperm donor isn't interested, she can help herself.

    What is complications arise during the abortion, what if she can never have kids again.
    I know someone who ended up this way.

  9. Please tell her you do not support her decision as such, you are not able to accompany her there. Simple. It's better you forgo the friendship than do something against your values and conscience. Who knows? Your refusal may even make her have a change of heart and keep the baby.


  10. I once attended a deliverance service where people who had done abortions were called out, then people who had escorted someone, paid for an abortion, adviced someone to abort etc were also called out because we were all equally guilty. The next thing that was done surprised me a little, an impromptu funeral service was held for the souls of the unborn children. That's when I knew that I could never be in any way involved with an abortion ever again.

    Please advise your friend to keep the baby, you never know what it's destiny is. Don't be responsible for cutting it off.

  11. I don't think you should lose the friendship over your best friend's error. Although, I don't support abortion, if she decides to go on with the abortion, you shouldn't sacrifice your relationship over her indiscretion. Chris

  12. Poster, whether or not you follow her to the clinic, as far as you see nothing wrong in what she is doing/about to do, the sin has already been committed, your physical presence not withstanding.

    I don't think your friend should abort that pregnancy, abortion is never the answer. Plus, I'll keep saying it, people should learn to take responsibility for their actions. You slept with a (practically married) man, its not like you were forced or cajoled, you walked into the situation with your eyes opened and now its time to reap the rewards and you're trying to cut corners. Besides, any number of things can go wrong during an abortion. Both of you should think it well o. There are many things that are much worse than being a single mother, not being a mother at all cos of some silly mistake you made in the past is one of them. God help you and your friend o.

  13. Asides being a sin, it is also unlawful to indulge in, aid or abet abortion so be ready to be persecuted if caught. Advise ur friend not to abort the baby, its not the best thing to do.

  14. I am a single mother and that's because I'm pro-life. I take responsibility for my actions and I bear the consequencies. Plus, two wrongs never make a right.
    My Lil one is so handsome and I wouldn't trade him for anything else. Truth is, it's stressful but my aunt keeps reminding me of the numerous women who are married but taking care of their kids all alone - feeding, health, schooling, clothing, etc with no help from their husbands. Plus the baby's father acknowledged him and is part of his life.
    My advise to you is to keep that baby. Unless your heart is made of stone, the moment you have her in your arms, nothing else would matter.


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