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The Wife & The Workplace

A while back, some of my friends and I were talking to a friend's Mum. All are married and some had nasty complaints about their husbands. My friend's Mum listened patiently and then told us a little story. 

She said that when she was much younger, a few years into marriage, she used to make her husband breakfast before he left for work in the mornings, then around noon she would also cook and take him food at his office. She said she noticed that most times the coolers came back untouched, but that wasn't even the problem. Everytime she went to her husband's office he was always with one lady or the other. It was rarely ever the same chic twice and these girls were all young attractive single girls. 

Heartbroken, she went to see Father in church one Saturday evening and poured her heart out. She expected comfort and sympathy from Father, followed by an irate phone call where Father would summon her husband to the church for some good scolding and condemnation. She was in for a big surprise. 

Father simply said "But did he tell you he is hungry? Did he ask you to be bringing lunch for him? Stay at home or get a job, whatever you decide to do just stop going to the office, you have no business there". 

To say that Mum was shocked and disappointed would be a huge understatement. So Mum listened and never took food again, daddy never asked for the food and seemed happier, and they both lived happily ever after. LOL. 

Last week I listened in on a show on Naija Info and the topic was whether a person should have a say in who his/her spouse hires (or fires) at the work place. 
     An elderly woman called in and she voiced her opinion strongly; "No No No, you shouldn't have a say in who your husband hires! You have no business with your husband's work place. No business whatsoever!!! You should not even go there." The presenters were surprised and one asked "But ma, what if you want to take him lunch at work, is that ok?" Once again mama echoed "No No No, you don't do that! You have no business going to your husband's office. If he needs lunch he will sort himself out or take it with him in the morning! Don't go there!


Earlier this afternoon while doing a transaction at the bank, I noticed a particular lady walk in. She was dressed in casual shorts, a Tshirt and flats, and she had a basket covered with a napkin in one hand. She was pretty and cheery and everyone seemed to know her. She greeted the staff genially and went straight to an office upstairs. She came down after about three minutes and left, without the basket. 

I gathered she's a wife to one of the ogas and it was obvious from the reaction of the staff that she was a frequent visitor at the office. As I watched her leave I wondered if her husband frowned at this rather kind and thoughtful gesture; bringing the husband lunch at work. Does it, perhaps, embarrass him to have her show up at his work place with baggy shorts, Tshirt, a big smile and a basket of food? Does it disrupt his work flow? Does he wish she wouldn't, but hasn't found the right way to express this particular displeasure? Or does he actually like it? Hmmmm...

Where does one draw the line? Is getting involved in your spouse's workplace really taboo and a sure recipe for disaster? What do you think? Guys would you like your wives to bring you lunch at work everyday? Ladies would/do you do that? Is there really anything wrong with this warm and innocent gesture? (Ladies, let's be honest, this gesture isn't always innocent; what are you going to look for in his office everyday? Issorai. El.Oh.El). 


  1. That reverend father is very harsh sha but what he said is the truth. Lol

  2. Lolling @el oh el. I wont go to your office biko, that has to be the height of my joblessness, announcing to the whole world that i'm jobless, take it in the morning or fohgerrit. Its not a taboo, but it can sure be a recipe for disaster, so that all those monitoring spirit girls can start giving you attitude, mbanu!

  3. I can go to his work place if it's for something important,not frequenting the place like its my kitchen. As for lunch either he takes it with him in the morning or he should biko by all means sort himself out. Thelma read through your last paragraph and correct it.

    1. Nkem please what's the error? I've searched twice but can't seem to find it. Thanks btw.

    2. Ok, found it. To that other Anon, do get some manners. Thank you.

    3. oya, Nkem please help point it out, cos me no see anything

  4. I believe it depends on the man. There are men out there who values their wives food and ll never eat out. Such men ll definitely want the food brought over. That being for me I ll rather not start it cos if there happens to be a fight between us, it's very possible I won't bring the food that day/week and I hate people knowing we fighting. So he eats wherever he chooses..

  5. Gaddamnit future wife! I don't need you bringing my lunch to work every other day. I can sort myself out biko. I'm not a baby, thank you! Warrahel? Na we sabi play love pass? Ptfffffff

  6. My boss gladly carries his well packaged lunch from home in a cool basket. I admire d whole concept.
    Dnt really know abt taking food to ur man's office... Really dats idleness.

  7. Open communication is key. It's cute to wanna be all cute and all do it if it's something he wld want and something u can do.
    Biko how far does ur hubby live from his office that u wld be doing school run because of lunch delivery?

  8. I agree with what Sasha Bone said.

  9. On a very good day, I can send pizza to him via delivery, all this taking lunch to hubby, me I can't o, who gats times for that. When I'm even praying for a chef.

  10. Never been to my husbands office .. If I want to give him lunch, he will take it with him in the morning .. The priest is right and u also don't want his colleagues to use you and do "see finish" ..

  11. And who would bring my own lunch to my office?
    Biko,don't start what you can't finish...its cute tho,kudos to all who do it..
    If you have the time and you both agreed to do so,fine!

  12. well, if the man is the like of Kenneth Abah, he wouldnt mind. otherwise i dont think men like it.

    to the women, if all wives and girlfriends begin bring their food for office, the office bin will run over

  13. The Rev. Father said it all. Good luck to those who are doing or will do it.

  14. Ladies, unless you dropping by to grab a quick quickie, you have no business going to your husband's office.J

  15. My boss brings his breakfast every morning. Madam brings lunch with the driver at lunch but sits in the car while her driver delivers to oga's driver. I can count the number of times she has been in his office in two years - Exactly 3 times, yesterday being the third and first time this year.

  16. Thelma your ebeano supermarket is on fire oh.
    Chai what happens to our Thelma now?

  17. Where @ thou oh Thelma. Hope you are doing well. Regards.


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