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30 Going On 40!

I'm finally feeling like Christmas is in the air!

Anyways..... Just when I was getting depressed over feeling like I'm an ancient dragon, thanks to people not addressing me as sistah, aunty but as ma and madam, something had to go and happen to make it worse. 

Yesterday I had a morning flight to catch and seeing as I have some kind of history of missing flights, I somehow overdid it and got to the airport too early, and seeing as I left home before I could have breakfast, I had to get something to eat at one of those overpriced airport fastfood joints. Thankfully just when I was cursing under my breath, wondering why the sandwich which was really just two slices of bread with half an egg cost more than a loaf of bread and a crate of eggs, I heard someone ask the waitress to put my bill on his tab. 

I smiled politely in gratitude and carried my tray to a table and as expected uncle asked if he could join me. He was very chatty and started to tell me about his life and his career, turns out he's much older than he looks. Then he asked where I'm from. "Anambra", said I. 

"Oh wow. Anambra. I worked there in 1981. But you must have been very little then" he said. 

"I wasn't little, I wasn't even born!"

"What? In 1981?" Surprise written all over his face. "What year were you born?" He asked and I told him.

"Wow! Wow! I wouldn't have guess it" he said reflectively. 

"Why?" I asked, my heart breaking by the second. 

"You just look so, so, so.... mature" he said, lying. We all know the word he was looking for is 'old'!

Guys it's official. I'm 30 going on 40 and this isn't good for business! It's just not. 


In any case when I got into town I was starving once again but this seemingly extreme aging made me swear off food for a while so when I saw this smoothie bar I was all over it! Now don't you find it strange how there are so many smoothie bars everywhere. Two years ago nobody would have considered this a lucrative business to have in Nigeria. Apparently this place is doing so well, I was there for about 10 minutes and there was never a lull. 

Their fresh juice was also very fresh and 100% natural!

Anyhooooo after a very healthy lunch, I still went and spoilt it by eating heavy food late at night, when I decided to go out for dinner with this guy I met a while back. Brother is fine af! Great job, great hair (yeah I love thick bushy hair on a man), great physique, great prospects et al, but... You see, this "but", I'm just not feeling it. 
     This guy is a grown man in his mid 30s yet is swears stupidly like a child. The first time I decided I couldn't deal was when he said "I'm so fucking upset, I have a presentation to make tomorrow and i need excel to do it but I'm not so good excel so my colleague promised to help me. Now I'm calling the fucking bastard on my phone and she's not answering". That made me like him less. Then one day we were gisting and I said something funny and he laughed and said "Oh Nwando, you fucking twat!" Hia! Now I liked him much less. Another time he called a "fucking wanker". Still last night I decided to finally go out with him and I can't say I'm glad I did. It was curse-galore. 
     At some point he addressed the waitress as a "stupid fucking bitch" to her face, all because I said I wanted gizzard and she brought snails. He always sounds good natured and humorous but I do not like it. And when I mentioned it he said "You can't change me. I can't change for you". Would something like this be an issue for you or nah?


  1. Well, judging by ur photos, u don't look 30 honestly O, but then again there's this thing they say about the looks and the beholder.
    As for the 'fucking brother, I don't think its an isssue at all because he can actually stop it, just that he doesn't want to, just yet!

  2. Big issue. Obviously, he has no regards for others.

  3. Red flag - font touch him not even with a borrowed brain or heart. As for looking older than 30 - might not be such a bad thing. If you want to look younger - natural hair is almost aleays a winner - it took about 7 to 10 years off my face for starters.

  4. "You just look so, so, so.... mature". Reminds me of one time I didn't see my ex for 2 months, and when I did..

    "Wow, you're now f..."



  5. haha! Just Imagine if someone marries that one and there is a fight, I fear what he would say...Not only is it a big issue for me, I would never go out wth him again. tooo Immature. A mature guy would speak like a person not bark.

  6. Tee that LV bag, please can you do giveaway with it?

    1. This your question makes sense, truth.
      And she should say the winner must have two Cs in his/her name! :D

    2. Lmao @ two c's, ole

  7. Hian!
    That's a deal breaker- a big one- for me.
    There is nothing I dislike more than a person who curses- whether it is in writing or in speech- it tells and shows how uncouth such a one is.
    Let me put it this way, the friends I gravitate towards are people who would NEVER swear so I wouldn't really be seen on a second date with the guy- if he pesters me about the reason for my avoidance, I'll simply tell him the truth- maybe it'll make him change in the long run for his next girlfriend.

  8. "Oh Nwando, you fucking twat!" Hahaha, this one killed me.

  9. Ah! It'll be a very big issue for me o. Why won't a grown up 'somebody' (in my parents voice) have a conversation without using swear words? Mba nu. My friend in school does the same thing, small thing you'll hear 'idiot/idiots', 'motherfucker' and so on.

    And I hate it when someone's says I look older than my age, chai! The thing dey pain me die.

  10. I fucking hate that there is no light at home,and these bastards keep bringing crazy bills running into millions.who the fuck do they think will offset the damn bills.I don't wanna fucking rant but Naija be making a Virgin cum.
    Btw I don't blame him, that bro must be getting them crazy Nepa bills too.

    1. Hahaha, I agree with you o. I was hardly at home last month and they brought a bill of 60k.I don't swear normally but I shouted "fucking he'll!" when I saw it.

    2. Steel, where do u live that u pay 60k Nepa bill? My bill hasnt passed 2500 in the last 1yr

  11. The guy swears too much. I don't think it's cool.
    Then he is rude too...tsk tsk.

  12. Oh ok

    Me I was just giggling all over this post

    Thelms....u sure don't look older than 30....whatever the age you look,there is someone out there who would love you for looking like you

    OK bye

  13. Lool...
    you do lool good for a 30years old woman!
    As for swearing it can indeed be a turn off...but my female cousin, she used to swear so much it was her second nature! But now shes calmer, she has a kid and tries to control herself!

  14. There are a few things I've learnt and one of them is that we shouldn't be too quick to dismiss people at the first sight of a perceived 'failing'. For analysis sake, You mentioned a number of his pluses: 1) Great Job, 2) Great Hair (sentimental attachment), 3) Great Physique 4) Great Prospects and just one 'failing'. The thing with 'changing' perceived 'flaws' in people is that you have to earn the right to change it and show and convince them that you really are working in their best interest. I'd reckon that if he listens to you, heeds your well thought advice on certain matters, there is a higher possibility of him dropping the swear word usage (forget about his impulsive response to your initial try).

    As an addendum, I'd advice that you should draw up a number of items that are critical in a relationship for you, and items that are less critical. Often, when we meet people, it is easier for us to be put off with a social flaw in them even when they seem to meet most of our checkboxes. The thing with social flaws is that it can be corrected especially if the checkbox of 'a desire to improve of oneself' is met.

    1. I totally agree with you....but he is also rude,rude people annoy me. J

    2. Chrysyinks, well thought out and presented idea. But how often do significant others succeed in changing character flaws, especially while dating? For the most part, you just get to accept them as they are. And the few times success is achieved in changing such flaws, how long does the process take? And who has time to wait and find out?

    3. Thank you Ada_Ugo.

      Well I can't be certain on how much change one can effect in one's significant other. But I know I'd be doing a disservice if I generalize that we have to always accept our SO's as they are because not every SO is the same. That's the reason why I hinted that she should look out for if he listens to her, takes her advice on related matters and he has a desire to improve himself. These qualities are indicative if expecting a change is reasonable.

  15. Reminds me of the time i went to the market to buy rice. I couldn't have been more than 14 or so. I was trying to price down the rice or summin, and this guy starts commiserating with me on how he knows its difficult to feed the family these days. *eyeroll*

  16. Sure deal breaker. And No, you don't look older than your age to me.

  17. Swearing is a total turn off, what will he teach his children and nieces and nephews given that he can't even help but curse even when unnecessary, but I like the part where he said 'you can't change me, I can't change you' he didn't try to pretend like he would change and be keeping his true self until you are neck deep then he finally explodes, I take his words to mean it's never that serious, If you don't like me it's fine we can move on as distant friends

  18. Pls he wld nt change for you,so dt even expect dt u can cope with it for a while and he'll later change,he is even using style to insult u,those people are very capable of verbal abuse.Run sistah!


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Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

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