Thelma Thinks...

Guys, I was Catfished. No, it wasn't as extreme as the above but let me ask you this;

I have often compared relationships to baskets that can’t retain water. As a young man i have struggled to reconcile myself to the ways and behaviours of women especially when it comes to money. Try as i might, I cannot understand the lust for money that most women have, neither have I found a woman who does not yearn for financial contributions in relationships. Most of the ladies i have met in my 30 something years on earth have been so money-grubbing that they have scared the heck out of me and have kind of put me off marriage. After dating for several years and almost going bankrupt trying to please my girlfriends, i decided i had to find other ways to assuage my sexual appetite pending when i find a woman who can love me for me. You see most of the ladies i have dated in the past have always had one request or the other that they needed me to fulfill. Their wants were always insatiable… from an iPhone, to an iPad, to assistance with house rent or their parents/siblings medical bills…

I have been married to my hubby for 8 years and we are blessed with 4 boys which I had vaginally. After my last boy, my marriage went from bad to worse, as in, getting my hubby’s attention over the years has been very difficult. To have sex with him is even on ‘appointment’ basis. The rate at which my marriage was going, I knew that if I didn’t do something about it, it would move from worse to worst. I sought the advice of one of my very close friends and she told me what to do. As funny as this sounds, it was working very well and I don’t want what I am doing to end. I got a new phone and sim card, then opened new accounts on all the social media, putting all my best body parts as the display/profile picture, especially on facebook, whatsapp and bbm. I then sent a friend request to my husband. The silly man did not waste any time in accepting my requests. At first, he played hard to get but I still relented. Because my identity is not revealed to him, I went back to being the way I us…

During Mass today, when it got to the stage when the 'prayer of the faithful' will be rendered, the priest, in his obvious sensitivity for gender equality asked that four people should step forward. Two men, two women. They marched forward. The first person to come forth was one dark man, average in height. He never ceases to come out to offer the prayer of the faithful. Most times, the priest hardly concludes with the asking and he steps forward. I now assume he comes every Sunday prepared to do this service; with a seeming rehearsed prayer point. He has a mode of operation. First, he commands us to close our eyes! Usually in a tone fit only for the barracks not far away from where the Mass is held. Well, from the first day I attended Mass there, I have deliberately and defiantly flouted that command. After the command, he then goes on to shout his chosen prayer point for the day in a way that mocks God as deaf. I usually shook my head as what readily comes to mind is: "…