Tuesday, 29 September 2015
Monday, 28 September 2015
Sunday, 27 September 2015
Saturday, 26 September 2015
My name is Raymond; I am from South South, Bayelsa State to be precise. I am in my mid 30s, working with one of the branches of United Bank for Africa (UBA) in Aba, Abia State.
I was involved in a ghastly auto crash a few years back on my way home from the east for christmas celebration. We were between life and death before God eventually sent a duex mechina to our rescue.
The incident damaged my reproductive system. The doctor declared me impotent ever since then. I met a girl in 2008 who came from one of the private institutions in southeast for her 6 months internship. One thing led to another, we both fell in love with each other and that was how the journey started.
During our first date, she told me she was a virgin and I promised her ‘no pre-marital sex.’
Four years down the line, we are still on. The parents are aware of our relationship. In fact, I just declared my intention of walking her down the aisle in December, but the question is that how would she feel when she discovers that I’m IMPOTENT? I dont want to lose her’
Please if you're dating or married to a man with certain erectile dysfunctions, impotence for instance, can you tell us how you both work around it, how you have coped so far and if it affects your relationship, and your happiness. Thanks.
Let me begin by saying that I really empathize with the poster for the accident and particularly having his reproductive system damaged. That's very unfortunate.
People who say "be weary of men who too readily accept the 'no sex till marriage' rule", are on to something. I've heard only too many times about people who painfully regretted that decision not to test the ride before the purchase. Please I'm not trying to pervert God's words, merely stating that it's a huge risk to take, and some people willingly agree to it for their own very selfish and wicked reasons.
But that's really not the issue now... I read this feeing very angry with this brother for leading this girl on for four years knowing fully well that he does not have a functioning penis. He's not just sterile, he is impotent! And no, I don't believe he loves the sister. But hey, the sister obviously loves him and I'm putting myself in her shoes. If a man I really truly love and am about to get married to after a 4-year relationship, tells me that he's impotent before the wedding, would I still get married to him?
To be honest, I don't know. I think sex is way toooooooooo important. I mean, even if there are medical methods of getting me pregnant, my life would still be very incomplete without sex from my husband. And I honestly don't think I can settle for a life time of average sex, much less no sex. Sex has got to be the bomb! Omo, I might sound shallow right now but I honestly don't know if love can conquer this. Yet, the thought of throwing four years away just because of sex, hmmm, is it worth it; worth losing four years for...? That's another thing to consider.
He's asking how she will feel when she discovers that he's impotent. Please can you answer him, how would you feel in her shoes. But more importantly, what would you do? Can love conquer impotence?
Photo source: www.blackloveadvice.com. Mail Culled from: DailyPost
Thursday, 24 September 2015
Wednesday, 23 September 2015
Tuesday, 22 September 2015
So, here we go…
Sometimes I am grateful to God I am not a woman.
I can’t have an education or it will make me lord it over my man, and tempt me to be the head of the home.
I can’t have a job because I will become proud and un-submissive.
I can’t have a job that pays more than my husband’s because it is an insult to his manhood and he will be emasculated. One day I will even use it to rubbish him outside.
I can’t be single at 25, and unmarried at 30, or without a single child at 35. It means I am cursed, have a spirit husband or have a bad character and no man wants to be with me.
Any achievement of mine is a waste and useless if I have no boyfriend or husband, and it will only make me more arrogant and unattractive to men.
Heaven forbid I own a car or a house for the same aforementioned reasons. The only place I can live till I marry, is my parent’s home.
Only loose women stay in hotels. If my job requires I travel, I must stay with older people, friends or an elderly couple who can talk to me about this my job that won’t allow me settle in one place and marry.
Expensive things are not allowed. I can’t marry quick with them.
I can’t speak about anything under the sun without a ring on my finger and babies who have suckled my breasts.
If my boyfriend/husband cheats on me, I must endure it and manage. All men are the same. There are no good ones around any more.
Whatever my husband says (even common pangolo boyfriend that doesn’t know his left from right) I must agree. The moment we got together, I lost my sense of reasoning and purpose in life. his word, even if foolish, is law and I must die to please him and obey.
How dare I expect my husband to hire a maid or ask anyone asides me to clean? What did he marry me for?
My husband, cook and clean? Am I mad? Is that not witchcraft?
Why should he take care of the kids while I sleep, travel or go out? Is he my mate or my servant? Am I a fool?
Oh, so I don’t know I must cook fresh soup everyday? I must be an idiot.
So, I don’t know I must wear make-up , heels and sexy dresses or be naked all day? Do I want him to go out and cheat?
The home falls apart because I’m a useless and stupid woman.
The marriage ends because I am a useless and stupid woman.
My husband cheats on me and beats me because I am a useless and stupid woman.
The children grow up horrible because I am a useless and stupid woman.
I am a useless and stupid woman…because I am a useless and stupid woman.
Its bad enough men think this way. To see women do it too, and fight men like me who have been carrying women’s rights on our head like we are the next Malcolm X, Luther or Madiba, is shocking and sad. Maybe one day things will get better.
I pray it does, because anyone who says the aforementioned trash to my baby girl(s) will hear from me, and they won’t forget me in a hurry.
Sometimes I am grateful to God I am not a woman. I might have killed someone by now…
Monday, 21 September 2015
Saturday, 19 September 2015
Friday, 18 September 2015
Take the first step by participating in this life changing mentorship program.
Topics to be discussed
Date: 22nd Sept; 2015 Time: 10am-12noon Venue: Wahab Folawiyo Senior High School.
Benefits: Scholarship Opportunity, Mentorship Session, Gift Awards, Life skills and knowledge for success, Tickets to Silverbird Cinema’s, Refreshment and lots more.
The Aspire To Become program is a mentorship program for Senior Secondary School students in a public school in Ikoyi. If you're interested in attending or being involved with the program, the details are up there.