"I was just angry! I listened to their show for about thirty minutes and heard them give advise after advise to different callers. But I couldn't take it anymore when one woman, another married woman called and they gave her an advise that seemed as if they were trying to finish what was left of her marriage. It was then that I couldn't hold it anymore. I decided to call!" The man paused for breath.
"I called the station and I asked the hosts politely, please, are you people single or married. I was surprised to hear that both of them are single. Not even one, but two of them. So I still don't understand how they became marriage experts, and they're here giving all sorts of wrong advise to people!"
I could feel the vexation in the man's voice. He called a radio station to complain about a show on another radio station.
Truth be told it's something I've been weary of. When I started blogging and sharing a lot of my past relationship experiences, I started getting a barage of emails asking for advise and I could see how easy it could be to become some "relationship expert", even without any actual knowledge, real experience or training. Yet I couldn't help feeling weird and wondering why people were so quick to ask for my advise knowing fully well that I was neither married nor in a relationship (that they knew of at least).
It occurred to me recently that most of the popular "relationship experts" are single. In Nigeria we have the famed Toke Makinwa who runs probably the most successful relationship Vlog in the country. We also have Joro Olumofin who happens to be a psychologist and seems to be in the process of carving a niche for himself as a love doctor, literally. Another of my favourites is UK based Oloni.
Ohhhh, my favourite is Derrick Jaxn. The guy in the picture above (Ladies, he's FIRE isn't he? A tall glass of creamy brown chocolate I can drink all day, calories and all!). This man is making hundreds of thousands of dollars as a relationship expert. He has written books, given talks, has a strong online cult-like following, is worshipped by many as a relationship god... And what's more, He. Is. Very. Single.
You'd think that one of the major prerequisites to be termed an "expert" in something like marriage or relationships, is to have been and stayed in an actual one, marriage to be precise. So it's somewhat mind boggling especially as all these people seem to be thriving really well.
Which makes me ask, do you think some people perhaps possess an natural aptitude for relationship matters, whether single or married, or would you rather they left it to those who have actual experience of being married.
Is being in a marriage and living through its realities daily, a necessity for one to term themself a relationship expert?