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Unconditional Love & Homosexuality.

Hey guys, I hope you've had a great day so far. I sure have and I'm thankful for each second of the day. I'm airborne at the moment and I'm thankful for zero turbulence. 

So the airport was crowded an hour ago, there was an imminent Air France flight and the intending passengers were of mixed ethinicities, and races. However I couldn't help but notice this one family, a group of siblings most likely. They caught my attention because of the way they hovered around one of them. On closer inspection you'd find that the one in the centre is an adult in his early twenties, he's got really good looks, in fact he looks almost feminine and in truth he actually looks like he might be very gay. I kinda got the feeling that his siblings, despite what he is, still love him so much and knowing the climates they're in, are very protective of him. 

It immediately brought to mind the recent wedding of Mpho Tutu, daughter of South African Archbishop Desmond Tutu. People had very mixed feelings about him attending that wedding. If you're wondering why then you obviously don't know that she's a lesbian and the wedding in celebration of her marriage to her gay lover. She's a mother of two from a previous traditional marriage btw. 

I read comments on various blogs. Some saying that an Archbishop attending a gay wedding was mockery of God and God cannot be mocked! Some saying that it was actually ok. Some saying that they did not care if she's his daughter; he holds a very high religious position and should have therefore dissociated himself from the marriage and wedding. 

Reading through the comments, many holding the opinion that Archbishop Tutu's action was morally and spiritually reprehensible. I began to wonder if there's a line we draw when it comes to loving, our loved ones and sexual orientation. I'm not sure about every family but I would like to believe that the idea behind being a part of a family includes experiencing unconditional love. 
    But when a loved one's sexual orientation is not in line with our religious or moral beliefs does it exempt them from this unconditional love? 

It was very interesting to read people views and I would love to hear yours. What say you, if gay marriage is legal in your country, would you attend the wedding of a gay family member or does your love suddenly become conditional? 

Do you disapprove of the former Archbishop attending his lesbian daughter's gay wedding?

Do tell. 


  1. Like my mother would say "if your child turns oht to be gay, you can only love them in return- anything less would make you a questionable parent" - i have gay friends and 2 gay cousins and frankly i don't give a toss whether they sleep with men or women - I loved them from the start and that wont change anytime soon based on their sexual preferences. I would rather discriminate against selfish and wicked people which is more common place in Nigeria.

  2. I once read a christain book that explains d real meaning of 'love thy neighbour as thy self. It says we ought to love, no matter what, becos God loves us all despite our sins, weaknesses, foolishness and all of that, and yes including the gays and lesbians!!!
    I think the bishop sure knows this very well,- not to talk of when the person is now a loved one. He can only talk to and keep praying for her.

    PS. It takes Grace and the HolySpirit to love in the way God wants us to and this kinda love will be tested when u are around annoying and unbearable people.

  3. No m'am. I wouldn't attend any gay weddings... Loved ones or not. In the case of the former, it wouldn't mean I loved them any less. It simply means I don't believe in what they are doing, and while I understand their right to their sexuality, so too should they understand my right to choose not to attend.

    As to the archbishop... Like I always tell people, Christianity isn't emotional at all. The very kind of love it is built on is not emotional and so except anyone wants to sell the logic that he attended as a father and not as a Christian cleric (which holds no water for anyone that understands that Christianity as a lifestyle transcends all that we are), then I think he shouldn't have attended. That attendance is easily interpreted to be consent and even approval of her choice, and that isn't what the faith He represents says. Add up the fact that he already got a chance to play "loving father of the bride" for the same daughter once, then you may begin to wonder "Wetin him dey find upandan"!

    1. What Buby said.

      it doesn't mean I love him/her any less or my love is conditional. A stand is a stand.... there are places where the presence of God would never follow you to. Not because he loves you any less, he just won't follow you.

    2. You brought the words right out of my mouth. Seconded

    3. I'm not perfect, so I leave judgment for God. I certainly won't hate anyone simply cos they are gay, I sure won't love my own child any less either. However, I will not attend the wedding simply because I don't believe in it.
      Other functions, on an individual level, yes.

      God's word is clear on this, but I will not discriminate against anyone. I equally don't think gays should be sent to jail either, it's absolute rubbish.

    4. "I wouldn't attend any gay weddings... Loved ones or not. In the case of the former, it wouldn't mean I loved them any less"

      My position exactly.


  4. I will have a hard time getting to used the fact but it won't make me love them any less. When I traveled I met a guy that looked and acted like a girl, I realized that all the guys were avoiding talking to him,(or her, I get confused sometimes) so that no one would think they are guy, he looked so sad and lonely that I felt so bad for him. Eventually I went to talk with him and he turned out to be quite interesting, although the gender mix didn't come up.

  5. 1 John 4:16: "So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him."

    In order for us sinners to be able to abide in love, and hence abide in GOD, we need JESUS to (literarily) come dine with us as he did with sinners over 2 millenia ago. Once at the table, the message is clear, gentle, and simple: "Step into the light".

    GOD loves us unconditionally that's why HE'S given HIS SON to us, who has paid a very steep price so we can abide in HIM. We have to also bear in mind that those who, for reasons sometimes clouded in ignorance, fail to abide in GOD, end up tragically. Question now is: didn't GOD love these ones unconditionally? Didn't GOD love the victims of the great flood, citizens of Sodom and Gomorrah, the conquered citizens of Canaan? Didn't GOD love Ananias and Saphira? And...DIDN'T GOD LOVE LUCIFER BEFORE HIS FALL?

    In the parable of the great feast (Matt 22:1-14), we see the outcasts being invited to dine with the king, but one of them was still dressed as an outcast while feasting (verse 11-13). Terrible mistake. He was immediately cast out.

    It's normal for Tutu, as with any NORMAL parent, to have unconditional love for his kids. But failing to admonish his lesbian child and even supporting the degrading of a sacred institution in the name of love is delusional and dangerous. An outcast doesn't attend a feast dressed as an outcast. The result is catastrophic, not even "unconditional love" will save the situation.

    Peace (in Kon's voice).

  6. If I love them from the start before realizing they were gay...,the love continues but to attend the wedding,I doubt if I would not because I don't want to associate myself with them but with regards to my beliefs concerning this issue and I expect them to be understand and respect it the same way I would respect theirs.

    Do I disapprove of the archbishop attending his daughter's wedding.....No I don't,to each his own.

  7. Why is the next man's sexual orientation important?? To me its not. If you like be a fag. As long as you dont try to fag me, we are cool.

    If my family member is gay. Its not a problem. Ill attend the gay wedding proudly. As long as its family, I have unconditional love.


  8. I think we have over-flogged this gay issue for long...
    My stance still remains, if Desmond tutu's other daughter was getting married to a man, should he attend? If Yes. Then he has no reason to justify not attending the wedding of the other marrying whoever that one wants to marry. You are celebrating with daughter's happiness for heaven's sake.

    If we like judge from now till tomorrow... He's not apologetic of his action. So no one has anything against him.
    And if my child turns out gay(hopefully not), if I hear say I won't attend because of resentment for his sexual preference. *sigh!

    1. why the "hopefully not" clause ehn Uyi? is that not judging too? if you dont see anything wrong in being gay, why dont you want any of your children to be gay?

  9. Family tie is very strong especially where genuine love exist.


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Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
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