Skip to main content

Dear Thelma. (My Fiancé Wants a 3some!)





Hello T, it's ok if you don't feel comfortable posting my mail but i will appreciate it if you do. My boyfriend and soon to be husband has been asking for a request for sometime and being honest with myself I actually want to do it, because he has been so good to me. He was like the answer to all the prayers in my life when everything was just very depressing and nothing good was happening for me. My ex just disappeared from my life because according to him I did not have a job and he needed to marry somebody that can bring something to the table. Thelma I was jobless, broke, single and very depressed when I met this man. He did not only get me the job where I am working now but even helped my twin sister to get a job too. Last year he took me to europe and us, the very first time I'm leaving this country and this year he is planning vacations for us abroad again and for our honeymoon, please don't look at it as if I love him only for money because it is not true, it's just that I never believe that somebody can love me to this extent. Even when his aging month was saying that she doesn't want Himto marry somebody from my place he stood his grounds and said that it is either me or nobody else, he made sure that his family accepted me against the person they wanted because he is the first son.
 I cannot begin to tell you all the things this man has done for me but he has truly changed my life and even my family. Thelma I even now drive a car o! In almost two years of dating I have never caught him cheating on me and I just have so much peace with him. The only issue now is that he's been saying he will like us to do something fun to spice up our sex life. We really enjoy good sex together but he said for more flavour that can we have a threesome? At first I thought he was joking but he has asked several times again, although not forcefully or putting me under pressure. He says he just thinks we will enjoy it and even strengthen our bond. Personally I have nothing against it really so it is not like I am under duress but I'm afraid that it will change our relationship or bring about something negative that might affect us. We are planning our wedding for november-december and I don't want anything to come and scatter our plans. Please I need advise from your mature reader because I want to be guided. Thank you.

Comments

  1. You do know that your boo is about to open the door to who he really is. If you walk through, there's no turning back. More bizarre requests would follow and because you feel so grateful cos he's your Jesus in this earth, you will want to humour him and give in till maybe he requests your twin joins in or... Ok I'll stop now before I get carried away. All I'm trying to say is, it won't be a one time thing and he'll keep asking for more especially after you sign the dotted lined. Be guided.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are so right.

      Delete
    2. Putting it in the dance context then, we can say step one step two is the foundation to becoming Michael Jackson or kaffy if you prefer. Then again.... Maybe not! Be guided and prepared to bear the consequences of whatever you decide, though I'd give Lohla's comment much more than a passing thought (If I were you).

      Delete
    3. That's not true. I had a threesome with my fiance when we got engaged newly. We're married now and he hasn't come up with any bizarre request, we haven't had another 3some since then and his respect for me hasn't diminished in any way. So poster, maybe you should give it a try, maybe it's just something he wants to try out.

      Delete
    4. i agree with lohla. jenny what works for you might not work for the poster

      Delete
  2. Kon,
    Please respond from the man's point of view. Thanks.

    Dear lady,

    If you want to do it, go ahead. But know it will not be a one off thing. It will continue. Read up on the pitfalls of such adventures first. Ask questions on use of protection, sex acts and what is forbidden. Who will get the third party? Will she be a stranger or someone you know? Will there be a non disclosure agreement?

    All these and more should come into play. By the way, what if he wants your twin sister? Think about it.

    Mallama

    ReplyDelete
  3. Lol! You have no problems with it, then why bring it here.
    People should learn to keep their issues to themselves. You have brought it here and everybody who can type will have a say.

    I did it with my fiancee (now wife) because we were curious. I brought up, she was intrigued we decided to try it but there were rules. It should not be anybody we know or are friendly with and it should not be someone who stays in our vicinity and it must not be done in my apartment. I used to visit a popular strip joint in Ikeja, so one day, i decided to take her there and ask her to choose who we should ask.

    Bottom line, we did it. It was nothing too spectacular and it cured both our curiosity. We are happily married now and I do not have that kind of urge again and i believe neither does my wife.

    IF you feel comfortable with it go ahead (if you trust your husband not to get carried away).

    My two cents, threesomes are overrated.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Baba. When you get home. Help me shake your wife's hand.

      Delete
    2. Rhetorical Q: Em, did u do it with the other chick or was she just there for props?

      Delete
    3. thats a good question.. did you have sex with the other girl ?

      Delete
    4. Left to me I don't think there's anything wrong...lol..we all have fantasyzzzzz..if you can handle the aftermath fine if not don't do it...btw if you n your partner understand yourselves n are both freaky go ahead..because let's face it alot of people especially guys fantasise about it...Nne you don't have a problem...

      Delete
    5. i'm curious to see the reply to sasha's question

      Delete
  4. Lol, amma look at this post independently of what he's done for u. My dear, u knw a 3some is just "licence to cheat with ur partner being present",yh? So once a 3some, always gonna be more 3somes (later in the marriage). Don't start what u can't continue (esp when it relates to sex). You cld promise him one tho but don't say when (prolly when ur both wrinkled as an anniversary something)
    Hope my comment is mature enough..

    Lemme ask, wld it be a guy or a girl in the 3some?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But is it really "cheating" if your partner is present, consenting and fully aware?

      Delete
    2. It's not cheating, you're both having fun. But poster don't do it if you're not comfortable with it.

      Delete
  5. He says he just thinks we will enjoy it and even strengthen our bond. Personally I have nothing against it really so it is not like I am under duress****** smh.. Imagine your life. Why asking questions when you already have an answer.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Me I just think threesomes are shady sha. Anyways, question for you- are you interested because you really love him and can do anything for him or because you might also be interested? I don't even know what to say... Let no boyfriend of mine go all threesomes on me o... I can't even deal

    ReplyDelete
  7. Don't do it. Gently talk him out of it. And you sound like you want to do it because of his goodness to you.

    ReplyDelete
  8. *Dear girl, it seems u wanna do it, and since u are not under pressure, i feel like u should give it a deep thought. will it be worth it at the end. In my opinion, u shouldn't since the relationship will likely lead to marriage. (No use ur own hand pour sand for ur garri o!)...Jane #myfirsttimecommenting#

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Jane, please keep the comments coming.

      Delete
  9. - Threesome is a level of sexual perversion.
    - Is your sexual perversion as high as his? Because after threesome it will be maybe group sex, or he wants to watch you being gang banged by men, or animal sex, or hard core sex. Have you guys done anal sex? If you wont be able to handle all the sexual perversion then dont even start it.
    - If he cheats on you what will be your reaction? Because basically he is asking for approval to straff somebody else. If you dont give him the threesome he will have sex with somebody else to kill the urge. So the question is - Would you rather be there while he cheats OR you dont wanna know about his cheating.
    - My advice would be to turn down his offer gently. Thats my advice. Im the kinda guy that cant do freaky shit with my wife because I look at her like a queen that should not be stained but I didnt mind doing freaky stuff with all the girls before her. Im saying he might even appreciate you more if you stand your moral grounds. Its a risk tho.
    - As a trick, tell him the 3rd party in the 3some should be a huge, sweaty, hairy muscular guy. Lets know his reaction.

    Peace.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ugh!! why do guys think this way ?? you don't want to do freaky things with your "queen" but you rather do it with someone else ?? my bf has said that too.. I wanted to spice things up.. whipcream and give him a bj he stopped me and said he doesn't really like this because he sees me as his future wife and this seems too nasty and does not want to see me this way ??... (he never asks me to give him a bj.. I'm the one who offers)..I would love my partner to be freaky with me...lets explore our bodies together don't see me as a queen or whatever that should not be grabbed or rough handled (just a lil bit) lol..

      as for you madam.. if you are open to threesomes..I'm with the guy who did it with his wife...but thread lightly

      Delete
    2. Kon I really don't agree that it would lead to more freaky stuff. And what's with you men and not wanting to "taint" your wives then going outside to do the more exciting things with sidechics? Do you really think you're doing your wives a favour?

      Delete
    3. On the contrary, I do freaky things with my husband (not 3some tho) n I'm sure a lot of other married couples do.. it all depends on the individual in this case, as dats part of d reasons I married my husband. So girl maybe u should try other freaky stuff with him, it doesn't have to be a 3 some, but girrrrl make dat man sweat, ther r many other things u can do to him n he'll totally forget abt dat 3 some n marry u real quick...lol...
      Jane

      Delete
    4. It might and it might not lead to more freakyness. But if you do a 3some then its easier for me to suggest to you that we should become swingers or try out group sex.

      Dunno mehn. Cant explain. But I'd rather not do some things with my wife. She would kiss my kids with that same mouth. But yea if she brings up the freaky stuff....yall know Kon doesnt back down *Wink.

      Delete
  10. Please have the fear of God in you! You're not supposed to be involved in sex before marriage and now you're talking of threesome(sexual immorality). Please give ur heart to Christ, change ur mindset and live only to praise the name of God and you won't need to ask such questions. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I sincerely doubt the Poster is a Theist, and if she is, "fear of GOD" mantra isn't what she's looking for right now...which is quite disappointing though.

      Delete
    2. LMAO ... but Jesus is always the answer na lol

      perverts everywhere

      Delete
  11. Why do I feel this man is testing you, please stand your grounds, no threesome until you are married, before d man ll think that's how u ve been doing threesome upandan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol, testing her as per microphones, right?
      If so, he's not well.

      Delete
  12. Poster what is NO in your language? Oya tell him Capital NO. You want to know my reason? Scroll up and read mallama's comment.

    Besides sex is Adam & Eve, not Adam,Eve, & Linda. Be wise darling, tell him to hold his piss. Maybe just when I get home, I would write extensively and post.

    ReplyDelete
  13. He most likely already has someone on his mind.

    He is just trying to open the door to something.

    I believe there are couples that can do this, enjoy it and move on.

    Obviously from all indications, I sense his own 3rd party will be a girl, cos no reasonable husband to be will watch another man wank his wife (except ur boo is hiding in the closet).

    My theory is that he is probably gay, and this is his own way of opening up gradually. (lol)
    He has probably put you where he wants you to be (dependent on him) while you hide his secret in the future.

    But don't take me seriously, cos he may just be adventurous like that, and of course we can't ask you to pray for guidance, since you are ok with it.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I assert that the relationships that thrive best are those that are exclusive - intimacy shared between a man and woman only!

    ReplyDelete
  15. I won't do it if I were you. .. no matter what he's done for me. In fact I had rather have this story as why we didn't end up together.. cry in my room and be pathetic a while.

    ReplyDelete
  16. More so I don't think your heavenly father ll like this. Not to seem so religious but you already having pre marital sex, why rub it in with threesomes????

    ReplyDelete
  17. I can't picture it in my head. It's a NO, for me.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hmmmm I just don't think you should allow it. I mean pre-marital sex is a sin already and you now want to add threesome. Like I always tell peeps 'don't start what you can’t finish.'

    ReplyDelete
  19. Has d world really turned this way?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Poster, I just asked my husband about this and he said the experience will probably bring the 2 of you more closer and comfortable with each other,like it did for us.

    ReplyDelete
  21. I just have this feeling that the poster has done it already. The aftermath of the whole issue ( doubt of what she's done) is what she's bringing here to likely have someone tell her to go ahead with it, so that she can put her mind at rest.
    This chic so obviously do not need ur advises to decide if she should do it or not, she needs y'all to tell her 'oh honey, it's okay to do it with the man u love and who seems to love u back, and intends to marry u'. That comment will put her mind at rest biko. Abegi jor, people be thinking they are smart by twisting their lame stories.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Late to the party, I suppose.

    Humans just like to complicate things always. If you love someone and the person wants something, if u want that same thing as well then go for it. Love and be loved.
    From all indications, u are also open to it as well. What other approval are u looking for? Apparently u want doubts as well. Trust me, doubts won't help.
    Enjoy your relationship with your fiancé and stop getting scared of the future. The future in itself will happen just as it happened in the past when u met him.

    Bottom line; he wants to 'explore' threesome and you are not stuck-up to it. Have fun with the (legendary) 'threesome' (that everyone is skeptical about it) and let's know how it went. Lol

    ReplyDelete
  23. what is this "it will make our bond stronger" it will bring you closer and be more comfortable with each other" that's what me i don't understand o.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL. It seems the other person's fluids will act as gel to the couple's pre-existing bond! Or maybe it's that kinda bond that comes with having Bonnie and Clyde 'runz'!

      Delete
  24. 3some? Me? No no! Aren't I enough? Or maybe the extra would be there for props? Something like refereee in a wrestling match? Ehen!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Turia Pitt Suffered 65% Burns But Loved Conquered All...

Amazing Story Shared by Dr. Ben Carson on Facebook, i thought it is inspiring and i decided to share;

The Australian ex-model Turia Pitt suffered burns to 65 per cent of her body, lost her fingers and thumb on her right hand and spent five months in hospital after she was trapped by a grassfire in a 100 kilometre ultra-marathon in the Kimberley. Her boyfriend decided to quit his job to care for her recovery. 
Days ago, in an interview for CNN they asked him:
"Did you at any moment think about leaving her and hiring someone to take care of her and moving on with your life?"

His reply touched the world:

"I married her soul, her character, and she's the only woman that will continue to fulfill my dreams."

***
This made me very reflective. I just wonder; if the person you love today encounters an incident or accident that transforms who they are physically, it could be amputation, it could be paralysis, it could be severe burns that scald their flesh beyond recognition, w…

#WriteRight. VIVIAN: MY FIRST SEX EXPERIENCE WITH MY BOYFRIEND

He was my coursemate, crush, then my boyfriend.... he was super
intelligent, smart, tall, dark and handsome. Believe me he got
swag, but he didn't seem to notice me. (I'm a nerd but a sassy one
if I say so myself).  So oneday I decided to take it to another level..
After listening to a song "IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY TELL THEM THAT YOU
LOVE THEM and watching the season film of The Secret Life of
American Teenagers. ..when Amy Jeugerns mum told her "you are only
young once". LOL that part got me.
Hope you know what i mean?

Though I'm okay with chemistry class I approached him to coach me for
the Quiz that was coming up, we found out that we had this
great chemistry between us.. hehehe both the covalent and
electrovalent bonds....

So one thing led to another till one unusual Saturday. I invited
him to my house and he came. The guy got swag, he even came
with a packet of durex condom.
We talked for a while and and and and and and
Kai!
See how you are serious dey read this story....!
My…

...

Good morning people! 
Just checking in to sign the register. Lol. It's been a very busy week and it looks like it might be an even busier weekend. I was hoping to get some writing done when I got to the airport yesterday but I even almost missed my flight. It was hopeless trying to do any work on the plane as it was bumpy af, and this toddler behind me wouldn't stop screaming in piercing shrieks like he was being exorcised. 
I got into town pretty late and needed to keep an appointment ASAP. I'm heading out right now and it's going to be a long day, but thought I should drop this first. 
Have a splendid day. Im'ma be back soon.

One More Post...

THE ‘NEW’ SIDE CHICK: I WAS HER

A side chick is commonly known as a mistress or a woman that’s romantically involved with a man who is in a committed relationship.  However after doing some reflecting, I realize that’s not the only type of side chick.  I want to discuss “the new side chick”–a woman who decides to stay by a man’s side after he has expressed his lack of relationship intentions with her through his words or actions.  So many women have made this mistake at least once in their lifetime, and unfortunately I’ve done the same thing. I like to think of the new side chick as an appetizer.  You’re there just to satisfy the immediate appetite of the man, but as soon as that mouth-watering entrée comes out to the table, you will get pushed to the side, literally.  Why?  Because that entrée is what he really wanted; he went to the restaurant to order steak, not hot wings.  You were just a placeholder, fling, temporary commitment, or  maybe even just a “good ol time” until what he really wanted was presented to hi…

Shhhhhhh....

I'm in an amebo mood tonight. Don't ask me, I honestly don't know why. Also I'd like to share too but I'd do that anonymously in the comment section. Tonight I want to talk about secrets. It's ok, we can all be anonymous. 
Is it true that EVERYBODY has a secret? 
Is there anyone here who doesn't have a secret? I'd really like to know; You're a completely open book and there's not ONE thing about you that you wouldn't mind other people knowing about? Please raise your hands up. 
And for the rest of us, what's something about you that no one knows, or very few people know? Who's got a dark secret here, or a weird one, or a funny one even? I really don't mean to be invasive but I don't want to be the only one sharing, plus I think hearing other people's secrets is quite fun, don't you think?

Let's Be Random Together! (Open Keypad).

Hey guys, a while back blog reader F said something about creating an Open Keypad post, where you can write whatever you want in the comment section. I thought it was a fun idea!
So who is interested? Comment on anything you feel like, ask me or anyone a question, talk about how your day went, your job, your interests, tell us something about you that we don't know, share a testimony with us, rant about anything you feel like, talk about your crush/boo/spouse/relationship/marriage, challenges you're facing, ANYTHING AT ALL! 
I'll only make one request; that we stay civil. 

(F it was you who made this suggestion, right? I'm not too sure and I can't even remember the post the comment was made on). 
BTW please Ejoeccome out come out, wherever you are!

Question of The Day.

TTB readers doesn't this tweet below remind you of something?
That mail that someone sent me a few weeks back. 
But why on earth should a man sleep with his son's fiancé? But what am I saying, some men even sleep with their daughters...

Oh well, I'm throwing the question to you. What has happened in your life that you never saw coming, you never hesperred it, you never imagined could happen, you never imagined could happen to you? 
It could be good, it could be bad, it could be ugly. Do tell!
And it can be more than one. Let me tell you a few. 
-owning a blog -week long dry fast at Prayer City (I never hesperred it).  -staying in an (emotionally) abusive relationship.
The others require anonymity. LOL. Now over to you.

Adventures, Fun, Friendship & Laughter at the TTB Hangout (Lekki Conservation Center).

Nicole to Clare: mummy lets go. I want to climb that ropy thing!

Isn't Clare beautiful?!

Uyi et moi. Clowning. 

Mother & child. 


Scary af! Trish on the ramp. The chica loves the outdoors so much, she was like a kid in a candy store. She and Uyi took this walk twice! More power to them, you can't pay me to do this a second time.


Uyi & Tiwa