Please post urgently. If someone loses their temper and does something just one time does it mean the person is an abuser? I ask because my partner of two years and seven months did something last night and I am so confused about whether I was at fault or he just displayed something that he has been hiding since. But is it possible for somebody to be pretending for almost three years? Yesterday we were in his house and I noticed he was chatting with someone. His phone then rang but he immediately cut the call. I grabbed the phone from his hand and if you see how he jumped up and started struggling for the phone with me and it made me more curios and angry. He started screaming that I should give him the phone and I refused. Then guess what, he burnt my face with his cigarette and pushed me on the floor. I was so shocked because I never expected that kind of assault of using fire on my face. I packed my things and ran home. Before I reached my house he was already calling me to beg me to forgive him, he said he didn't know when he did it and he can never do it again. He has never lost his temper in my presence before or shown any sign of abuse so that's why I'm wondering if this was just a one off. But see, if he slapped me I wouldn't have minded as much as I do that he actually pressed a burning cigarette to my face. To me that was calculated and wicked. If he wanted to burn me he could have done it on my hand or anywhere else but he chose my face. Also I'm petite so he could have just pushed me on the floor without burning me. I am very fair and now I'm carrying a fresh burn on my face that I cannot explain to anybody. But I know he loves me so much and so far is the gentlest and kindest man in the whole world so I'm so confused. He even called his elder ones to call my phone to beg me.
Another issue also is the way he reacted when I grabbed his phone, this means he may be cheating or hiding something from me. The truth is that I can forgive a cheat but not an abuser. I need answers because we have done introduction and I cannot be in an abusive marriage. Thelma please help me post because I need answers. Thank you.
*poster I'm so sorry I didn't post immediately you sent this. I haven't had access to my blog for a while*