If I scream now they'll say my mood swings have come again, seeing as ever since I wrote that post (Here) everything is now mood swing this mood swing that. But why wouldn't I react when this guy just grabbed my arm like I'm a common thief?
Yes, it's understandable, it's his job, it's for security purposes. I don't always like it but you're searched before you enter some bars, and if you've got a bag with you, it's searched too. That's fine, what wasn't is that the guys all went in, after receiving amiable greetings from the bouncer but when it got to me he grabbed my arm!
"Open your purse" he gruffly ordered me and I obliged him, and then I said to him, "Next time, do not touch me. You did not have to touch me". The men, my friends, exchanged knowing looks and I could hear them think #dramaqueen.
Maybe I was being a drama queen but shouldn't I find it upsetting that each of them were greeted like royalty simply because they have penises and when it got to me, i was grabbed by the arm and ordered to open my bag? Didn't I deserve to be greeted too? Didn't I also deserve to be treated with respect? I ignored their derision and settled into my seat.
A few minutes later the waitress approached us to take our orders. "Good evening sir. Good evening sir" she greeted my two male companions. "What can I get for you?" She asked them without as much as a flicker or a glance in my direction.
"Wait o! Nwanyi! Am I not here? Am I invisible? Do you mean to say that as conspicuous as I am you did not notice me? Or where you come from they don't greet women?" I asked her casually. 'Casually' because even though I was, I did not want to sound upset. I didn't want to make an issue out of it. In fact, I didn't want to talk about it but I just couldn't ignore, especially after what just happened at the door.
She mumbled a nervous apology and actually looked regretful, as though it's never occured to her to greet a female. When she walked away from the table I looked up to see both men staring at me irritably.
"Are you a feminist?" One of them spat. I was confused.
"Yes i am. Why do you ask? And why does your question sound like an accusation?"
He immediately backed down, as though not wanting to get into an argument with a mad person, simply because when asked a question that I suspect was aimed to shame me, i stood up and owned it, to their collective shock.
This post is not about feminism. It's about your perception of feminism. Your honest opinion.
I call myself a feminist and I love and respect men. I do not think feminism means women are superior to men, I simply believe that no man is superior to me. You won't see me refusing to shave my legs or baring my chest because men can. You would see me taking care of my man and gladly cooking for him and doing things that make him happy. All I ask is to be seen and treated as a person, not less than. My belief is simple and that's that what's good for the goose is good for the gander.
But it seems there's something missing. Perhaps my notion of the concept is too simplistic? I hear men talk about feminism like it's a dirty thing. They'd say she's a feminist the same way they'd say she's a hoe or a gold digger. But what makes even less sense is hearing females say God forbid, I'm not a feminist oooo, as though it's insulting or something shameful.
So I'm confused and I'm going to ask. Let's play a game and do a little word association here, I can't help feeling like I'm missing something and I'd like a clearer picture.
When you see or hear the word FEMINIST what's the very first thing that comes to your mind?
Please type your comments below. Also please share your thoughts on the concept of feminism and why you're for or against it.
Thanks a lot.